The Art of Making Quality Friends and Keeping Them

The Importance of Friends

Friendships are so important for living a fulfilling life, but if we have the wrong friend/ friend groups they can also lead us down a path that keeps us in dark places. If friendships are formed around addictions, gossip, and constant complaining; we keep ourselves from reaching higher and living better.

I’m often asked about how I stay surrounded by such amazing friends, so I started paying attention and here is a list of ten things I do to make and maintain quality friendships.

10 Ways to Make and Maintain Quality Friendships

  1. GET YOUR MINDSET ALIGNED WITH MAKING NEW FRIENDS— If you tell yourself it’s hard to make new friends, it will be. When we give ourselves this message, our body language will reflect our belief in this message. Instead of attempting to connect or engage, our bodies give a signal that we are closed off. Make sure your mind is open to actually making a new friend.
  2. GET OFF YOUR ELECTRONICS—Engage with the life you are having in the moment. An opportunity for a conversation can start anywhere, but if you aren’t where your feet are, you will miss it.
  3. STOP LOOKING DOWN— Look up and make eye contact with others. You won’t connect with others if you don’t make eye contact. When we look in the eyes of others, sometimes we see ourselves. Those are the people to engage with; one simple comment can turn into a 30-minute conversation and lead to a great friendship. 
  4. CONNECT LOCALLY THROUGH GROUPS AND VOLUNTEERING—Find groups that interest you and/or volunteer with a local cause you support. You will meet plenty of potential friends through your passion for your community.
  5. WALK YOUR NEIGHBOORHOOD—If you live in a good walking area and have the right mindset, you have the opportunity to connect with plenty of people who live right by you. If you have a good conversation, you could ask if they will be here the same time tomorrow. Then it may become a regular thing.  If you don’t live in a good walking community, find a local area where there are opportunities to connect with other people who are walking—Always remember steps 1-3!
  6. INVEST IN YOUR DEVELOPMENT— This will mean something different for everyone; it can be personal, professional, spiritual, financial, educational, and/or physical. If you go places to invest in yourself, you will meet others who are working on the same thing. THOSE ARE YOUR PEOPLE!
  7. SHOW UP IN YOUR KID’S LIVES—If you have kids, show up at events.  Connect with the parents of the kids that they are hanging out with. Some you may want nothing to do with, but others may turn out to be your best friends.
  8. KNOW WHO YOU ARE WITH— We each will have people who are around us who have different strengths. We can’t expect people to be who they are not. If someone makes you laugh, enjoy that quality. If someone is good when your stuck in a storm, let them carry your umbrella. Just don’t expect more from people than where their strengths are. When we allow people to be exactly who they are, we keep old friends too, because we remember why we love them in the first place.
  9. DON’T EXPECT OTHERS TO DO WHAT YOU ARE NOT DOING FOR YOURSELF— When we take care of ourselves, love ourselves, respect ourselves, and show up for ourselves—We attract people to our lives who will treat us the way we deserve. 
  10. KNOW WHEN FRIENDSHIPS ARE UNHEALTHY AND WALK AWAY— Friendships are meant to lift us up. If friendships are making you feel under stress on a regular basis, you do have the option to end relationships that aren’t contributing to you leading your best life. If we feel like the friendship isn’t serving a positive purpose in our lives, we don’t have to stay in them. This doesn’t mean if a friend is struggling, we walk away. It’s being healthy enough to know what is a drain to our energy, and what is being the best friend we can be in someone else’s time of need.

I hope this list helps! Enjoy the journey!

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff ©2020

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Rachael Wolff

I believe we are all powerful and can change the trajectories of our lives by breaking old patterns that no longer serve us. Our perception is our power. I share my experiences to keep me focusing on what matters and to help others do the same. My goal is to live life from a loving place. This is my journey! I hope you come along, and it becomes a destination you want to come back to on yours.

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