A Mom’s Tale: Reflections from the Heart

This past Saturday was my daughter’s first high school Homecoming dance. I don’t know if it is because of our recent experience of running from the gun, recognizing how fast time flies, and/or feeling for people like the Guttenbergs and Gabby Petito’s family (and so many families like them) who never get to see their little girls again, but I’ve been feeling super sentimental through this entire experience.


If you know my writings, you know that my journey is about figuring out how to live life from a loving place. It is at the heart of everything I do. Yet as a mom, I’m not above the struggle of the re-surfacing of old wounds and projecting those on my kids. My kids are my drive for living life from a loving place, and they are the ones who help me see the importance of staying on this path. I’m so incredibly grateful to be a mom and to have the opportunity keep doing better for them and myself as I grow right along side of them on this journey. As I’ve written and spoken about ample times, the moment I found the definition of love and truly saw it as the definition was the beginning of a series of life-altering changes in thought, belief, and behavior patterns that keep on offering me the most amazing gifts and blessings.

The definition (in different versions) is posted multiple places in my room as a reminder (that I’m don’t always remember to follow) to project love. Following this definition has changed all my relationships for the better and has given me the strength and courage to remove myself from relationships that didn’t have this definition at the core. Having this reminder helps me be accountable and responsible for my thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors whether I’m operating from a place of love or a place of fear. These two versions of Corinthians 13.4-13.7 are just different enough to make sure I don’t rationalize my thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors to confuse love with fear. Even if I can’t see it in the moment, I have the opportunity to hold myself accountable when I CAN come back in a loving way:


“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

1 Corinthians 13.4-13.7, NIV Study Bible (1985)

“Love is patient, love is kind; Love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; It is not irritable or resentful; It does not rejoice in Wrongdoing, But rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, Hopes all things, endures all things.”

First Corinthians 13.4-13.7, Harper Collins Study Bible (2006)

I just can’t help but be grateful for my kids, because without them, I would have never known that love could be more than what I had allowed myself to experience up until that point.

At this moment, I feel nothing but love in my heart and it is the most wonderful feeling—pure AWE. My hope is that I will be able to carry this feeling with me as I know I will need it in my next moment where I will have to choose to respond to my kids from love or react out of fear.

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff, Author of Letters from a Better Me

About this post:

This piece started as a Facebook post on my personal page. I didn’t see what I wrote coming, but as I wrote I felt this need to keep sharing. There is a lot going on in the world right now and sometimes, I need the reminder project love in my daily life. I thought maybe others might too. For anyone who needs it, I hope this helps. Thank you for reading. If you want to see more FromALovingPlace.com, you can explore the page and/or subscribe with your email here:

Taking Responsibility for Contributing to the Collective

I’m taking responsibility for what I’m contributing to the collective. I’m not responsible for what anyone else is doing. I’m serving my highest good when I’m aligned with energy of love, abundance, and peace. It’s not just about the actions I take, but it’s the energy, thoughts, and beliefs I put into those actions. If I do things from the energy of fear, lack, and separation, I’m contributing more fear, lack, and separation to the collective—EVEN IF my actions are what others think will benefit the collective.

What I’ve discovered in the last year of doing the Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace (click to read more) blog series is that doing things for the wrong reasons, which is out of fear, lack, and separation doesn’t serve anybody. The same action can be taken by two people, one out of fear and the other out of love. The one that comes from love is the one that serves the collective in the best way possible. The one that comes out of fear still contributes to the collective of fear. I’ve seen this in the world and within myself over and over. I’ve come to the conclusion that if I truly want to contribute to the collective energy of love, abundance, and peace, I have to take responsibility for when I’m not doing that. I have to watch where my thoughts, beliefs, and energy are going.

I’ve watched myself struggle through some very dark perspectives that have led me to take actions. Even though the ACTIONS were positive, the energy I was contributing to them wasn’t. I was in the energy of fear, lack, and separation and as much as the steps could be good for the whole, my energy wasn’t so I was still contributing to more fear, lack, and separation. It took me a long time to figure out the impact of this on myself and others.

Even now, I’m raising two teenagers whose experiences can help me see where I’m holding onto emotional pain from when I was a teen. I’ve seen myself react out of fear of them repeating patterns. I’m still actively trying to navigate not letting my actions be out of fear while helping them work their ways through this time. I keep repeating to myself, “I’m giving them seeds, they have to choose if they are going to plant them.” I remind myself that they will have to experience what is necessary for their own paths. I have no control over that. The best I can do is guide them by aligning my own energy, because then I know I’m serving them the best I can. I’m responsible for what I contribute to their journeys and that’s it.

When I take responsibility for what I contribute to the collective, it means that I’m going inside to keep myself in check. It’s not about if people agree with my perspectives, choices, and actions. If I know that my energy is aligned with love, abundance, and peace, the choices I’m making are serving the highest good for the collective. If I’m aligned with fear, lack, and separation, I take responsibility for that and do my best to figure out how stop contributing to that energy in this moment. THIS MOMENT is the only place I can make choices to do better.

With Love and Gratitude,

©Rachael Wolff 2021, Author of Letters from a Better Me

Get your copy today in audiobook, ebook, or paperback!

Beyond Talking point author Interview with Rachael Wolff

Bridgitte Jackson-Buckley, owner of Little Visioneers bookstore, asked me to be her special guest on her Beyond Talking Points video podcast series. I was so grateful for the opportunity to have this important conversation about forgiveness and so much more.

Beyond Talking Points: Forgiveness and Affirmative Letter Writing with Author Rachael Wolff

You can also find the interview at: https://www.littlevisioneers.com/podcast

We had such a beautiful conversation! I hope you enjoy!

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff, Author of Letters from a Better Me available in audiobook, ebook, and paperback

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #342

I’m grateful for waking up socially. Waking up socially for me is about becoming aware of what I’m responsible and accountable for in my social interactions and what I’m not. I used to put a lot of responsibility on others to make me feel a specific way. I had no idea that my expectations are not someone else’s responsibility to manage. Waking up to this has saved me SO MUCH emotional pain. I’ve become a natural at setting healthy boundaries for myself and not accepting unacceptable behavior, but in a way where I stay at peace. That was a HUGE one for me! I treat myself with the love and respect that I want, so it’s reflected back to me in my relationship with others. I feel blessed to learn and grow from all my social exchanges no matter how uncomfortable they may get.

I actually love watching when I’m having a negative reaction socially what it’s reflecting back to me. If I’m attracting energy to me that is aligned with fear, lack, and separation, I look at where I’m projecting fear, lack, and separation out. I usually can find it pretty easily now. I cannot fix what happened, but I can choose different and awareness is ALWAYS the first step.

I absolutely love the feeling of having an enlightening exchange with someone that is aligned with love, abundance, and peace, because I know when I spot it, I got it too! The energies together amplify which makes me feel wonderful about the energy I’m helping to contribute to the collective. There is always more room for the energy of love, abundance, and peace out there. I have specific relationships which I’ve scheduled in that are truly focused on aligning with the energy of love, abundance, and peace. If we weren’t there when we started the conversation, we get there in the conversation. It’s so important to my wellness to have relationships that contribute to aligning my energy with love, abundance, and peace. Knowing that helps me attract more of it. I love how my social interactions contribute to my wellness.

One of the things that I love being aware of is watching how plans work and how they don’t with others. I’ve gotten to a place where I fully trust what is meant to work out does, and if it doesn’t it’s not what’s meant to be in this moment. I don’t get angry or upset by the people who cancel plans, change plans, don’t have time for plans, and/or come and go from my life. I know when I’m meant to share a moment in time with someone, I will and it will be Divine timing.

I don’t focus on what specific relationships don’t provide, I put my focus on what I AM giving and receiving in the moment. I have no expectations on any one person to be what they are not and give me what they can’t. If my energy isn’t aligning with someone else’s, they won’t be in my life at that moment. No judgment, no resentment, just a simple awareness that right now in this moment our energies aren’t aligned. Either, I’m not the person they need right now or they aren’t the person I need right now. My needs are always DIVINELY met.

The relationships I have now are all blessings. Some people will reach out when they are in pain and my feeling is that if I’m available to be there to support them, that’s my Divine purpose in that moment. It doesn’t matter if I don’t hear from them again in a year or 10 years, I feel like if my name pops into someone’s head and I’m there to receive the call, I’m meant to be on that call. If I miss the call or have other things going on, I’m not the one who is meant to be there. Now, if I answer the phone and get a tight feeling inside, I pray and ask for guidance on my next move. I just make sure my energy is aligned with love, abundance, and peace and the call will serve the highest good.

The most amazing thing I’ve noticed is how people are attracted or repelled away from my energy field. I’ve learned to have faith in how this works. Every time I’ve tried to force relationships with people when the energy is actually being repelled, it just doesn’t work. I figure if our energies ever align, we will have a place in each other’s lives. Being awake to all of this has helped me to live a more peaceful life.

I love that any social drama that comes into my life quickly moves away from me, because sometimes people need to cause some chaos to give themselves permission to walk away. I’m not responsible and accountable for anyone else’s energy, thoughts, feelings, and/or actions. We each get to choose the stories we are telling ourselves and those stories will align us with the energy of love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation. That’s why my social wellness relies on knowing what is mine and what isn’t.

Today, I commit to igniting healthy social interactions. The best way I know to do this is by making sure my energy is aligned with love, abundance, and peace. I want to make sure that I’m projecting the relationships I want to have reflected back to me. I love my social exchanges when my energy is aligned with love, abundance, and peace. Even if the other person is in the energy of fear, lack, and separation, I can meet that exchange with compassion and empathy as long as I don’t join the person in engaging in the energy of fear, lack, and separation.

One of the things that helps me is seeing people I’m in a social exchange with as my mirror. Do I want to be a reflection of their energy that is being projected onto to me? What energy do I want to project out to be reflected back to me? If the energies don’t match, one person will walk away from the mirror. My job is to focus on what I’m projecting in social exchanges. What someone else is projecting is not my responsibility to change, yet if I project love, abundance, and peace and they realize they want to be there, they will make the choice to be there. Me trying to force someone to be where they are not is me being in the energy of fear, lack, and separation. I’m saying that this person isn’t being who they are supposed to be in this moment. That is not the reality of the moment. They are being exactly who they are supposed to be in the moment because that is who they are being. Denying that doesn’t help me in ANY way. All it does is give me permission to make myself miserable with any story I’m telling myself about how they are not thinking, believing, and acting like they are supposed to act. Doing this then gives me permission to act like them just from a different angle. Mirrors are funny that way.

I have to do the work to stay aligned with the energy of love, abundance, and peace in my social exchanges. Sometimes it feels more natural to me to slide into my energy of fear, lack, and separation. When I’m there, I find justifications for staying in that energy, because that is the story I’m telling myself in the moment. I move out of the energy of fear, lack, and separation when I stop spinning stories that keep me in that energy. Once I stop making excuses and justifying my choice to stay in the energy of fear, lack, and separation, I can move back into the energy of love, abundance, and peace. The beautiful thing is it can happen in the space of one long deep breath. At the end of the exhale I can be back in the energy of love, abundance, and peace.

Part of me doing the work to stay aligned with love, abundance, and peace in my social exchanges is writing it out, which is what I’m doing here. When I see it clearly in writing, it becomes easier to do when I’m in the moment of the exchange. I’m working on choosing differently more often, which is what makes staying in the energy of love, abundance, and peace over fear, lack, and separation become the more natural choice.

Since I lived in the energy of fear, lack, and separation for so long, I have a lot of habits that have become an autopilot mode for me. I’m still in the process of being able to spot them when they pop up. The more I spot them, the easier it becomes to CHOOSE to think, believe, and do things differently in the moment. My social exchanges help me to see where I REALLY am in the moment. I pay close attention to the stories playing in my head during the exchanges. In order to ignite healthy social exchanges, I have to project healthy energy. If I’m not projecting that energy, I can spot that in my inner stories that are playing before, during, and after the exchange.

Today’s mantra: I’m accountable and responsible for the energy I’m projecting out onto others.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021, Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World (click title to learn more)

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #20

If we believe and expect someone else to do or be something that we are not being the example of ourselves, we are living in fear, lack, and separation. I’ve learned through a lot of VERY hard life lessons that until I started being the life partner I deserved, I was going to take what I wasn’t doing for myself out on any partner I attracted. I also figured out the even HARDER lesson that if I didn’t treat myself with love and respect, I showed others it was okay to do the same. For a very long time, I believed being treated disrespectfully was normal. How I treated myself kept me living in fear, lack, and separation daily. Learning to an AWESOME and AMAZING life partner to myself has made it so much easier to live in love, abundance, and peace daily. I’m so grateful I learned to be the best life partner that I can be on a daily basis. This doesn’t mean I’m perfect, nobody is. It does mean when I slip into the energy of fear, lack, and separation. I treat myself with compassion and respect as I remain accountable and responsible for making the necessary changes to move me back into love, abundance, and peace. Today, I’m very grateful to be my life partner.

Are you ready to commit to being your ideal life partner just for today? This journey is a one moment a time, one step at a time, and one day at a time process. The more present we can be with ourselves, the more capable we are of living in the energy of love, abundance, and peace daily. If you struggle wondering how to be your own ideal partner, take today and write down everything you think your ideal partner is. Now, what are you not doing for yourself that is on that list? I’ve written a lot about this both in my book and in my blogs. Making this list and doing the work to become everything on my list changed my life in the best of ways. I had to see the list to realize how much I wasn’t doing to be the ideal partner to myself. Once I did the work, I attracted a person to me that is a reflection of what I project now, and it is the relationship that is right for me. What I realized is I used to want the fairytale, but what I wanted as a life partner didn’t look like what was actually in the movies at all! Now, I do check-ins with myself to make sure I’m being the best ideal partner that I can be to myself. All my other relationships benefit from me doing this, because I don’t put unrealistic expectations on others when I’m fully aligned with the energy of love, abundance, and peace. When I’m not, I feel it in my relationships and I know it’s time to check-in again. Be your best date ever today!

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With Love, Gratitude, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2020

If you really want to dive into the inward journey, you can get your copy of Letters from a Better Me in audiobook, cd, ebook, or paperback.

Available at most major online book retailers

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #17

A key factor in aligning our energy with love, abundance, and peace is truly appreciating what we already have. Today, my focus is on the people in my life who show up. I feel the tears welling up as I start to think about how truly blessed I am to have so many amazing people in my life. I have people who have never met me showing up to support me in all kinds of ways, and I’ve been blessed to have opportunities to show up for others. I was supposed to be starting my book tour when things started shutting down and I wasn’t alone. I met so many authors on-line who were in the same boat, so we showed up for each other and it was absolutely beautiful. What could have been a very isolating experience wasn’t, because we came together. We have been celebrating each other ever since. I’ve actually met so many people since the pandemic in Zoom sessions and Facebook groups, people I probably would have never thought to connect to if it weren’t for this pandemic. I’ve gotten closer with family members near and far. I’ve also got to spend time with my two teenagers who were usually running around non-stop before the pandemic gave us this time together. Abundance in my relationships is off the charts, and for that I’m so grateful. I am not taking for granted the love that is extended to me and love I am so grateful to give. I’m so grateful to have a partner who despite how far away he is, he knows how to show up daily. I hope you will join me today celebrating the people who show up for you.

In order to create more abundance around our relationships, we have to show appreciation for the people who are already in our lives. If we don’t appreciate the efforts people make, we can easily start living in the energy of lack by focusing our energy on what people aren’t doing or what we wished they would do. I’ve seen this in my own life and other people’s lives. When we focus our energy around fear, lack, and separations in our relationships, we create and maintain cycles of chaos. Even when I was just beginning to find myself near the end of a toxic relationship, I made sure I to write things I was grateful for because it helped me to keep raising my energy to love, abundance, and peace, which is what gave me my strength to leave and permanently shut the door out of love for myself. I didn’t sink to a level that would take me down to create the same pattern with someone else or go back to him. If we want healthier relationships in our lives, this practice is so important! It’s not about what someone else is doing to us. It’s about the energy we are carrying within us—that is what we are responsible for! When our energy is aligned with love, abundance, and peace that is what we attract to our lives. People who aren’t in that energy may distance themselves, leave, or rise-up to meet our energy, but whatever they do is their business. Being responsible and accountable for what we are putting out into the world is our business.

With Love, Gratitude, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2020

See a preview of my book here:

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HATE is HATE. LOVE is LOVE!

I’ve been listening and observing to what is going on in me and the world around me. These are my perspectives on what I’m seeing. Hate, no matter where it is aimed, is still hate. I can see this in every area: race, gender, religion, intimate relationships, familial relationships, workplace, law enforcement, politics, economics, sexual preferences, community, the list goes on. Hate is hate! 

Hate divides, separates, and causes horrible devastation wherever it touches. Hate destroys the person who is feeling it too. Think of the way our bodies respond to hate in just one day. Now, imagine that hate festering inside you for months, decades, and centuries. When we project out hate, it often lands on the people closest to us. Hate destroys relationships, communities, countries, and the environment. 

Love is love. Love opens people’s ability to see a person behind the category or title (including ourselves). Love allows space for connection, compassion, and forgiveness. No group, category, or label own love. Love can be felt by any individual who is willing to be vulnerable enough to look in the mirror and embrace their own beautiful being. Love is the purest light within in our souls. The path to seeing love lies within us, and we only can project out unconditionally (which is the only authentic love) when we see and love ourselves. We have to know love from the inside in order to see and recognize it in someone else. Love is a gift that keeps on giving. We sabotage anything we don’t feel worthy of. We have to know we are WORTHY of love by giving it to ourselves. If we depend on the outside world to give us love, when that love goes wrong it can quickly turn to hate because that love isn’t coming from a solid foundation. Love is solid when it comes from within.

Hate suffocates love. When I see people lost in their hate, I feel for them. I have compassion for them. I pray for them. Their hate doesn’t dampen my love. If I feel like I am taking on their energy, I have to remember that I am responsible and accountable for the energy inside me. If I’m that person projecting hate, I pray for me, and feel compassion for me. If I don’t want hate inside me, I have to do the work to return my energy to love. That can mean:

  • Set healthy boundaries for myself
  • Stop watching, following, and engaging in things that trigger feelings of hate
  • Remove myself from a person’s life if their energy feels dangerous to my well-being
  • Seeking justice by reporting wrong-doing even if it is within a group I am connected with
  • Meditate more to restore my sense of calm
  • Write out my feelings fully to be able to see them and work through them
  • Find a professional or a HEALTHY person/group to talk to who will help me move away from the feelings of hate
  • Remove myself from groups that amplify the energy of hate
  • Find a physical outlet to work through hate and/or rage’s physical hold on my body (swimming, punching bags, trampoline, running, lifting weights, basketball, “Dammit dolls”, punching pillows, martial arts, etc.)
  • Take deep breaths in and fully release them, because we hold our breaths when our energy is tensed up. That is NOT good for our brain or body function.

If my energy is attached to the hate in anyway, it becomes my problem. It is my job to fix whatever is inside of me that is not aligned with how I want to be living. It is my responsibility ALONE to change the energy that is moving through me. My life and the lives of the people I love are going to be affected by the energy I’m carrying around with me.

Even with all I’m aware of, studied, observed and practiced, I’m not perfect. I still have to do the work and be reminded that I’m responsible and accountable for the energy that moves through me. I still have conversations with my kids that involve how they saw something I did or said differently than what was intended. That is within my own home!! Let that serve as a reminder. People will only ever see us through their perspectives of truth (beliefs). We will only ever see others through our perspectives of truth. The question is: How do you want to see yourself and the world around you? Choose perspectives of truth that define how you want to live your life. Love is a CHOICE! Hate is a CHOICE! If someone else chooses to hate, that is on them. I know their is a lot of love in the world. I want to amplify and align with that energy, because that CHOICE feels ABSOLUTELY AWESOME to me.

With Love, Compassion, and Gratitude, 

Rachael Wolff

Author of Letters from A Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World
Available in audiobook, audio CD, ebook, and paperback
see FromALovingPlace.com/book for a list of retailers.

Unity is in Our Humanity

Sometimes we just need to listen. When we see each other’s humanity, we stop hating what we don’t understand. We tell our stories from our own personal experiences. Each person’s story is important, because they are our truths. When we realize that a person is speaking based on their own personal truths, we understand that we didn’t live their experiences, so we may not have the same truths. It doesn’t make one more or less real than the other person’s truths. Our truths are all perspectives. We make them our reality by believing them. We can’t help others if we first don’t listen to the truths that they are believing about themselves and about others.

When we look deeper, we see beyond the categories and labels. We see the pain, joy, sadness, trauma, happiness, fear, and love within each other.

When we connect there, we unite.

We become vulnerable as the storytellers and as the listeners. We start healing, growing, and expanding. We see that each of us have the ability to change perspectives of truth, beliefs, and thoughts that are no longer working for the life we want for OURSELVES. We can’t change anyone else. We can make choices that will help us live better with ourselves and others. It’s all in how we decide to write and tell our stories.

Successful memoir writers and biographers are masterful at bringing us on a journey of connecting through story. Think of all the stories that have helped you connect to yourself and others. Right now there are so many people offering their stories on Facebook Lives amongst other venues.

I’ve learned so much about where individuals are and how they feel. I sometimes have to look past their rage, because that is the symptom of the pain that is so much deeper. Rage surfaces from unhealed parts of us that become triggered by circumstances, events, others, and even our own self-abuse. I can clearly see if a person’s perspective is from a loving place or a fear-based place. They project whichever one they are living from even when the words are not matching up with the energy they are projecting out.

We don’t have to agree with other people’s actions or views, but if we want UNITY, we have to first see the humanity in each other. Back in 6th century B.C., Greek storyteller Aesop said “United we stand, divided we fall.” We’ve seen and heard these words uttered over and over across categories, titles, genres, and venues. If we want to unite, we can’t just want to see things from our point of view and expect the the rest of the world to fall into place. Unity is in our humanity. It is the ONLY part of us that will experience the same things despite our differences. In our humanity we feel love, fear, joy, hurt, happiness, sadness, encouragement, disappointment, etc. No person’s money, religion, country, politics, race, gender, or sexual preference matter if we connect through what makes us human…LISTEN!

There are so many layers to this. This is just a small piece of a very big UNITED puzzle. But without seeing each other’s humanity, we won’t complete the puzzle. There will continue to be a missing a piece. We will never ALL believe and see the world the same way, so if you depend on that for unity, you will only ever find it in small groups which will keep you divided.

The beauty I’ve found living from a loving place is that I don’t have to agree with people’s beliefs on ANY subject and still see their value. The lessons I’ve learned from other people’s cruelty don’t strip me from seeing their humanity. I see the mentally unhealthy person, and know that it’s not safe or healthy for me to be around them, but I still learn from their story about the dangers of living life through the perspectives of truth that they believe. I see how miserable their perspectives have made them and how it’s hurt their relationships with others. Seeing that person’s humanity helps me to see my own darkness and work on shining light in areas that can easily turn dark if they go unchecked.

If I’m triggered with fear, anger, rage, or hate, I see what parts of me I need to spend time with to heal, so that I don’t project my darkness out to the world and hurt someone else. I don’t ALWAYS do this perfectly, because that is not what the human experience is about. The human experience is about learning. How can I learn if I’m not willing to listen? So, even in my differences with others who want to live from a fear-based place, I still can find a place to unite, grow, and learn. I cannot unite the world, but I can feel united with the world, and I do.

We have arrived at a point in time where we have the ability to listen to people’s stories first hand from all different corners of the world. We have the ability to learn about people’s truths that our different than ours while being safe in our own homes.

If you are looking to try to learn from truths that are different than yours, I suggested doing a meditation first. This helps me to really try to listen to the person’s story and learn from it. I pay close attention to the feelings that are running through me as I listen and see where my thoughts go. I find feelings I’m united in even if they are coming from different perspectives. I listen to hear if their perspective is coming from love or fear. I LOVE when I find people’s stories who are coming from a different way of seeing the world from a loving perspective. Those stories make my soul sing and my heart soar. The love within me expands so much more when I find voices united from loving perspectives. I don’t know if this will be true for you, but when I hear people speaking from fear-based perspectives, I feel so incredibly grateful that I learned a different way of living. Listening to them reminds me of where I once was and how much I’ve grown. Seeing their humanity strengthens my conviction on the way I’ve CHOSEN to live.

I know I need the reminder that unity is in our humanity, because sometimes it’s easy getting stuck in the chaos of what is keeping us divided. When I’m there, it hurts. I feel anxious, disconnected, confused, angry, and sometimes even vengeful if all of that goes unchecked. I know what I need to do to bring me back to peace, and writing these words right now is a part of that process. Thank you for being a part of my journey.

With Love, Compassion, and Gratitude,

©Rachael Wolff 2020
Author of Letters from A Better Me
Available in audiobook, audio CD, ebook, and paperback
FromALovingPlace.com/book

I Can’t Change You, You Can’t Change Me

My beliefs have never been changed by force. Each perspective of truth (belief) I’ve changed in my life has been based on if that belief serves the person I want to be and how I want to serve others. When I was younger, I didn’t consciously see my choice in how I viewed myself and the world around me.

Certain beliefs made me feel tense, angry, and rage-filled. When I would think about the thought/belief, my whole energy shifted and I often would feel sick and depleted. It took me a VERY long time and a whole lot of seeds from other people that got me to see I was making choices in my perspectives that were holding me back and keeping me prisoner.

There were some so deeply imbedded that it took voices from the Holocaust like, Viktor Frankl & Elie Weisel. Along with people like, Martin Luther King Jr., Mother Teresa, Byron Katie, and stories about Jesus and Siddhartha to help me see that I didn’t HAVE to continue to feel this inner world of pain. Those people were just the tip of the iceberg. I’ve talked to millions of people throughout my life. I read thousands of books. Nobody changed me, but I got the seeds and made choices on what to plant in my internal garden.

When I was young, I thought the world was against me. That belief didn’t feel good to me, because I can’t control how anyone else views me. 

What I do have power over is how I view and treat myself and how I treat others.

If I’m believing something that makes me feel like a prisoner of my perspective, I work on changing that. I found that EVERY time I engage in a perspective based out of fear, I feel like I’m a prisoner. Here is an example of another change I made:

I used to feel like a prisoner when other people would judge me based on a category/title they gave me or that I am naturally.

I changed my perspective to the understanding that people are going to judge me from their own perspectives of truth. That has nothing to do with who I AM. I know if someone speaks to me in a category of ALL: all women, all trauma victims, all white women, etc. that person won’t come close to seeing me, a person is only ever looking at me through their own perspectives of truth. If they want to lump me in an ALL category— That is their loss.

I love and respect myself. I take responsibility and accountability for my thoughts, feelings, actions, and reactions.

IN THAT ENERGY, I FEEL FREE. In that freedom, I attract amazing people to my life from different genders, races, cultures, religious followings, political backgrounds, economic statuses, and so much more.The more open I stay, the more I change and grow. Not by force, by choice and action.

Though, no one else changed me, I didn’t change on my own. I got the opportunities to SEE through different perspectives. I got the tools to change. I could only do that by being open to listen to ALL different perspectives to see what fit and what didn’t based on the place I wanted to live from, which is FROM A LOVING PLACE. I’ve disagreed with many of people along the way who tried telling me how I “had to” or “should” think. I know that is part of their journey. I don’t have to make it mine.

I know from my education in science, religion, psychology, spirituality, and personal growth, I can’t project out what I don’t already have inside. If I wanted to live from a loving place, I had to love myself FIRST. I had to experience love from the source of self to even know what I was projecting out to the world. I had to find the voices of leadership through love and not fear.

I can’t make anyone else change, but I will do my best to project the energy that I want to see more of in the world. I will do my best to give the people who want to listen the same opportunities I got. I will listen to the voices of the unheard, and learn and grow from them.

I will keep choosing to do my best to contribute to LOVE in my thoughts, beliefs, actions, and reactions towards myself and others. You do you! I will be here to representing my perspectives of truth FROM A LOVING PLACE.

With Love, Gratitude, and Compassion, 

Rachael Wolff
Author of Letters from A Better Me
FromALovingPlace.com/book