I’m grateful I found home. In my 20’s I spent so much energy and time looking for home outside of myself. I spun energy of fear, LACK, and separation projecting my desperation to live in a place that I considered home. I moved all over the U.S.A. looking for this place. Year to year I moved feeling disappointed. Each transition made me feel more unworthy and unlovable. I felt rejected. It was in that energy that I found a man that would feed on that energy in me. I gave him power over me by living in such an internal place of lack. I lived in the energy of fear, lack, and separation for nearly 10 years before I woke-up. This was not home, this was my self-inflicted hell that I created by living in the energy of fear, lack, and separation.
When I realized home was about feeling aligned with the love within myself, being able to project that love to the world, and creating a place where love could flow back to me—Feeling, Being, and Creating. Being able to feel, be, and create while aligned with love, abundance, and peace is my home. Home is within me and I project that home out to the people I connect with. This is why I have friendships that feel like home, a place to live that feels like home, a community to live that feels like home, etc. It’s not because home is outside of myself, it’s because I feel the home within myself so that I’m able to project home and receive it back. The people might change, the places might change, but the feeling of home within me doesn’t change as long as I continue to live and project from the place of love within me. Just another reason I’m dedicated to living from a loving place.
Today, I commit to BEING at home. Home is where the BEING is. When the DOING comes from the BEING I’m aligning with the energy that is home. That is the energy of love, abundance, and peace. In the past, I’ve talked about the internal garden. I create my own garden. I’m given seeds that I decide to plant and feed to become the life that they are within my garden. Today, I’m focusing on the home that is overlooking my garden. Just like in my garden, I’m responsible for building my home on a healthy, safe, and secure foundation, for me that is the energy of love, abundance, and peace. From that energy I build, manifest, and create the home that I wish to live in, but I only can do those things to the best of my ability by mastering the art of simply BEING.
Being is where I am grounded. Being is where I’m conscious of my thoughts, beliefs (perspectives), actions, reactions, and responses. When I don’t operate from a place of BEING, I’m not at home. I’ve left the building so to speak. Instead I’m operating in auto-pilot walking around unconsciously. This is where I decide to plant things in my garden that aren’t serving my highest good. The longer I stay in this energy, the more I plant that is aligned with the energy of fear, lack, and separation, because I’m separate from my home. I’m separate from BEING a source of love.
Committing to BEING is about connecting to the LOVE within me. If I want to project the purest love out, I have to be living the purest love within me. Being allows me to take time to be aware of what is happening within me:
- Where am I feeling blocks in my body, mind, and soul?
- Where is my source of love coming from?
- Is what I’m projecting out what I want to receive back?
- Where are my thoughts going when I slow down?
- Are those thoughts aligned with love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation?
- Am I giving from a loving place?
- Am I serving from a loving place?
- Am I receiving from a loving place?
- Am I open to receive Divine communications?
I don’t find these answers in the chaos, the busy-ness, or the doing. I find these answers in the BEING present in the moment. I find them when I slow down time and space to connect with the Divine Source. This is where my clarity comes from. This is when I sit peacefully in the walls of my internal home and act as the observer of the whole garden view. It’s from this place I can see any weeds hidden. It’s from this place where I can observe any areas that need some extra nurturing. It’s from this place I can pick and choose the seeds from my garden that I want to offer to my fellow humans.
BEING home isn’t selfish, it’s how I ensure that what I’m giving the people around me is aligned with the energy of love, abundance, and peace. There is nothing selfish about that. When I give and receive from an overflowing vessel, I serve the highest good for myself and humanity as a whole. We are only separate from each other when we are separate from ourselves. When we are at peace within ourselves, we project the energy of peace in the world. I have to stay conscious of what I’m projecting in order to live a wholehearted life.
With Love, Abundance, and Peace,
©Rachael Wolff 2021
Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World – Click on book cover to get your copy and start reading or listening today. For those of you who want a physical copy to mark-up with your insights, paperback is also available.