I’m grateful I authentically love myself. This took me a VERY long time to get to. I can look in the mirror without self-abusing. I can say no and KNOW that I have healthy boundaries because I love myself. I can love someone else without taking on their feelings of guilt, shame, fear, lack, and separation. I can disagree with someone else and not slide into the energy of fear, lack, and separation. I can do all these things because I authentically love myself. I know that the one person I am responsible and accountable for is me and that I’m going to project out to the world whatever I feel most inside me, I want that to be love.

I didn’t even recognize the definition of love until I was open enough to see that my definition of love was laced with fear, lack, and separation, which is anything but love. Learning how to love myself was an essential piece of being able to live life from a loving place. Loving myself helped me to love others in a way I NEVER knew before. I am able to see people and circumstances in a way that I’ve never been able to see before I knew this love.

I love that I can tell when and when I’m not treating MYSELF with love and respect. When I used to treat myself like I wasn’t worthy of love, respect, time, compassion, and empathy, I would accept others treating me like I wasn’t worthy of it. I would fight for others to love and respect me. I would fight for people to give me their time, compassion, and empathy. I was expecting others to give me what I wasn’t giving myself—that’s not love.

I am who I am, and I love who I am. I choose my reality by the energy I align with to create it. I choose to create my reality with love at the core. I choose to project the love I have for myself out to the world as much as I can. I choose to work through my energy of fear, lack, and separation as it comes up, because it will. I will learn and grow from my shadow, because I love myself enough to embrace all of me both shadow and light.

Today, I commit to showing myself the love I deserve. It’s not enough to say that I love myself. I authentically love myself when I am willing to do the work. My actions speak louder than words. One of the techniques I use is to think about the expectations I have of others to show me they love me. Then, I take that list and can see all the ways I’m neglecting to show myself the love I deserve. I look at my list and anything that I’m expecting someone else to do that I don’t do for myself is what I need to work on to give myself the love I deserve. The more focused I am on what others aren’t doing for me or how they aren’t appreciating what I am doing is how I’ve come to determine when I’m not SHOWING myself enough love. Here’s a sample of how I’ve learned to show myself the love I deserve:

1. I will show myself the love I deserve by MAKING the time to take care of my needs.
2. I will show myself the love I deserve by ENJOYING my time with others.
3. I will show myself the love I deserve by not expecting others to be who they are not.
4. I will show myself the love I deserve by drinking plenty of water.
5. I will show myself the love I deserve by taking time to stretch.
6. I will show myself the love I deserve by giving love to others.
7. I will show myself the love I deserve by treating myself like a life partner I want to live with.
8. I will show myself the love I deserve by sitting outside and enjoying the peace and quiet (quality time).
9. I will show myself the love I deserve by establishing healthy boundaries with others.
10. I will show myself the love I deserve by serving other from a loving place (not a place to gain worth or get something back).

We all deserve to be the best life partners we can be to ourselves. The healthier the relationship we have with ourselves, the healthier the relationships we have with others.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World (click title to learn more)