Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #171

I’m grateful for the life and wisdom of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. For those of you who don’t already know, MLK is one of my inspirations for FromALovingPlace.com. After my divorce, I spent the next four and half years going to school full-time as a single mom. I graduated with a B.A. from Eckerd College in December 2015. I studied MLK a lot in my years at Eckerd. My final year there, I went to the Holocaust Museum and upstairs they had a civil rights exhibit. I stopped at every section and listened to MLK give his amazing speeches. I listened to people talking about what it was like and the man MLK was. I think I went through an entire box of tissues that day. I just remember standing there in complete awe of how this man was faced with so much hate and kept choosing love over and over. Not perfectly, because none of us are, but with 100% conviction. In that moment, I knew it was a CHOICE to live from a loving place or a place of fear. One would leave me a prisoner in my own mind, and the other would set me free.

Today, I commit to soaking up the wisdom of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. His voice still rings hope in my ears every time I hear and/or see his powerful words…

“I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.”

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Peace is not merely a distant goal that we seek, but a means by which we arrive at that goal.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

“We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies.”

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Never succumb to the temptation of bitterness.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

“An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.”

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice anywhere.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

“The function of education is to teach one to think intensively and to think critically. Intelligence plus character—that is the goal of true education.”

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression, and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

“I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.”

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Just typing up his words brings peace to my soul as I’m once again reminded to…

RISE UP in LOVE!

If you want to join the journey of living life from a loving place, scroll down and follow FromALovingPlace.com.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

Rachael Wolff

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #170

I’m grateful for all the people who speak out about abuse. Tears fill my eyes as my fingers stroke the keys. If you have never been a target of a narcissistic abuser or a sociopathic abuser, you really don’t know the courage it takes to speak out. Some people don’t even recognize that they were abused until they start hearing other people’s stories. Abusers can be parents, family members, neighbors, loved ones, partners, bosses, co-workers, pastors, etc. If someone grew up in a household with abuse unrecognized, they will not see it in others who are doing the same behaviors. We have to recognize it first. Once we recognize it, we open a closed box of painful memories. It’s the people who speak up that help those people through one of the darkest times they may ever have to face.

I’m so grateful for all the testimonials, books, and personal stories I heard when I was unearthing my truths. I spent years in an emotionally, mentally, and verbally abusive relationship before I was willing to see. I was living numb. I was living empty. When people spoke up, I didn’t feel alone. When an abuse victim has those voices under their feet, they are carried. When we WAKE-UP from the brainwashing and mind control, we start taking our power back. I know that even though I read many of the books I did after I left, the people’s stories helped me break free from the cycle of abuse, because the stories were so similar. I started asking myself, how I became a target. I discovered I had unhealed shame cycles going on that were causing me to self-abuse. I didn’t recognize his behaviors, because I was treating myself worse.

Though people heal from abuse in different ways, the beauty is that there are so many people willing to share their stories. The more people who share their stories, the less we sweep it under a rug. When we face the abuses that touch our lives whether it is in our personal lives or professional lives, we give ourselves the space to heal, grow, and expand. Suppressing it can actually make us perfect targets for cults, extremist groups, and more abusive situations. If you’ve been reading this blog the last few weeks, I’ve been talking a lot about the ways people will attempt to get us to align with fear, lack, and separation. Unearthed shame around abuse can keep a person aligned with fear, lack, and separation at such a deep level. Remember, healthy people don’t intentionally hurt other people. Only the hurt parts of us can hurt someone else intentionally.

Today, I commit to using my voice to speak up about abuse. I hope that today someone who needs to know that they are not alone reads this blog. I hope they will choose to look at the way I choose to live now and have hope. I was once a victim, but I’m not anymore. I once felt like I was just surviving the day, now I choose to live it fully. I’m not alone in how I choose to live either. One of the things that really helped me heal was reading books by Holocaust survivors. I spent time in Holocaust museums and paying close attention to the heroes who spoke up and/or did something. I did everything I could to learn about abuse, so that I would not only spot it, but I would help myself find the path to breaking the cycle.

My book, Letters from a Better Me has been in the top 20 for domestic partner abuse on Amazon. People can find other books, tools, and resources throughout the pages I’ve written in both my book and on this blog. The best things I do for myself is to align with love, abundance, and peace and be willing to look at what keeps me in the energy of fear, lack, and separation. Our healing matters, not just for us, but for all the relationships we have throughout our lives. Our healing matters, because when we can become aware of when we are in the energy of fear, lack, and separation, we get the opportunity to heal, learn, and grow from it. We stop the cycles of abuse in the generations that come after us. It’s important to be kind, loving, forgiving, and accepting of ourselves. Learning to the difference between accountability and responsibility which aligns our energy with love, abundance and peace and then self-blame which aligns our energy with fear, lack, and separation is so important when we are recovering from the patterns of abuse. The blame keeps us in the cycle of abuse, and accountability for what is ours sets us free. We get to choose.

In the last few years, more and more people are speaking out. I have such tremendous respect for their bravery. Does this mean an attention-seeking person won’t sneak in and try to grab the spotlight from time to time, and lie? Of course there will be people who do this, but remember they are coming from an unhealthy and unhealed place too. If I choose to hate that person and let it affect my humanity with the next person who comes forward, that’s on me. If I let their alignment with fear, lack, and separation affect my alignment with love, abundance, and peace, I’m empowering myself to do something about it. They are responsible and accountable for what they put out into the world, and I’m responsible and accountable for what I put out into the world. I do my best to ask God to help them find their path to love, abundance, and peace. Just doing that helps me to realign.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #169

I’m grateful I understand agenda—the good, the bad, and the ugly. In school, I took a course in media & society. I also took time to study the psychology of sales and marketing because I was an International sales trainer for just under a decade. The one thing a person has to be crystal clear on is the story they are selling. That story must serve a person’s agenda to make the recipient hear a call to action. Some people will do this with good intentions, others may be bad, and then we have individuals who are very sick that have the ugliest of intentions. A person has to have a VERY sick mind to be in that category.

One of the greatest gifts is to be able to see agenda without attachment to the agenda. When I learned to be the observer, spotting agenda became an empowering experience. Some agendas are trying to trigger people’s energy of fear, lack, and separation. Others are trying to trigger the energy of love, abundance,and peace. When we are advanced enough to see the difference, we start seeing things in a very different way.

Understanding agenda has helped me in SO many ways. When I understand that people who want to get me to do something have an agenda, I can start asking questions and digger deeper to find out where that person’s agenda is coming from. If we assume because we are making a judgment about them as a part of a WHOLE group, we won’t see them clearly. If we put the group on a pedestal we may overlook important cues that tell us something about the person in front of us that may be a red flag. If we are judging them negatively by how we are labeling the group they are in, we won’t see their humanity clearly. The best thing we can do for ourselves is not restrict our own thinking.

One of the ways I do this is—I flip the script. What if someone I did like was saying what this person was saying? What if someone I didn’t like was saying what this person was saying? If it’s not the same, I need to open up my thinking. If I have to justify someone’s behavior, it’s usually coming from the energy of fear, lack, and separation. If I feel good about what a person is doing or saying, I don’t feel the need to justify it. I pay close attention to how people are trying to sway me if I hear justifications in my mind. For me, that is an internal red flag.

I’ve found conspiracy theories are riddled with some of the darkest agendas. Anyone who wants me to hate a group of people, I know that I want to stay far away from it. If someone wants me to dehumanize someone else, that is an agenda that breeds fear, lack, and separation. I like to make sure I can see the human. When I look to see the human, I find I don’t get swept up in the bad and the ugly agendas.

If I want to stay aligned with love, abundance, and peace, I have to make sure I’m not aligning with the energy of fear, lack, and separation. Understanding agenda helps me do that.

Today, I commit to considering agenda to help me align my energy with love, abundance, and peace. When I’m considering agenda, I ask myself these questions:

  • How is what this person is saying making me feel inside?
  • What is this person wanting me to do?
  • Does this person want me to judge myself of others negatively?
  • Do they want me to love myself and/or others?
  • How does it benefit this person if I hate this other person/group?
  • How does it benefit this person if I love this person/group?
  • Do I feel the need to justify this person’s actions?
  • Is this person coming from a place of fear, lack, and separation or love, abundance, and peace?
  • Are they wanting me to respond from a place of fear, lack, and separation or love, abundance, and peace?

These Questions help me get clear so that I don’t take in other people’s agendas unconsciously. I know that whatever I come up with is a perspective. That being said, the most important thing is how someone’s message feels inside of me. I’m not responsible for the other person’s energy, but I am 100% responsible and accountable for mine. If I want to stay aligned, it’s important that I feel connect to others who are spreading their energy of love, abundance, and peace. I’m very clear of how that feels when that is someone’s agenda.

I’ve noticed when I use these tools more and more, I feel it in others. It’s a beautiful thing. We get tuned in to see if someone is desperate and wanting us to pay. We can see if they are enjoying serving us from an authentic place or if they are doing it for a tip. We can see if someone wants to get us to pay attention to the good that they represent or distract us by telling us to focus our energy on hating someone else. We can see when a person is representing what they stand for (love, abundance, and peace energy) or what they are against (fear, lack, and separation energy).

This is a very interesting journey. Make sure if you go down this path, you stay focused on how you WANT to align your energy. If we don’t, we can easily slip into the energy of fear, lack, and separation. Revenge mentality comes from fear, lack, and separation. Forgiveness mentality comes from love, abundance, and peace. Forgiveness doesn’t mean we don’t hold a person accountable for their actions, it means that we aren’t willing to compromise our peace for their hate. It’s about us not tapping into the same energy as someone who’s agenda is aligned with the bad or the ugly.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #168

I’m grateful I overcame my victim mentality. I’m a multiple trauma survivor, so when I say this, I don’t say it lightly. There is a huge difference from being a victim of a oppression, harassment, assault, abuse, etc. and living in a victim mentality. It’s the same difference between feeling fear and living in a fear-based mentality. The “mentality” makes it a driving force in our lives. It’s the mentality that makes us spin all our stories to see victimhood and fear. It’s the mentality that pigeon-holes our focus to only look in directions that prove to us that we are victims at every turn.

There is a lot of psychology in marketing. Whether it be marketing for products, organizations, churches, political parties, candidates, and lifestyles. When we live in victim mentality, we turn off our critical thinking that makes us ask ourselves the right questions about what we are taking in. It stops us from doing the research outside of our own victim/fear-based resources which are all perpetuating fear, WHICH IS HOW THEY GET US TO DO WHAT THEY WANT! Even though people are using this to their advantage, it still doesn’t mean we need to ALLOW ourselves to be victims of it. I don’t carry anger and hate around to all those who use these techniques. That is their karma. Mine is making sure my energy is aligned with what I want to see more of in the world, which is love, abundance, and peace.

Our feelings of powerlessness and living in the illusion that something outside of ourselves gives us power is how we fall into belief systems of us against them, inferiority, superiority, cult mentality, along with blaming, shaming, and victimizing others. It’s a VICIOUS CYCLE. The only way the cycle continues is if we buy into it. I can’t tell you how many times people have tried to get me to buy into their fear-based belief systems. I had to recognize within myself that the only times I buy into them is when I’m in a fear-based or victim-based mentality. I’ve had people tell me that as a abuse (verbal, mental, and emotional) and rape survivor how I would feel for the rest of my life. I WAS a victim. I’ve spent years working on myself to break free from victim mentality because I saw how much it limited my thinking. I saw how my own stories were keeping me prisoner. This doesn’t mean current events don’t trigger me from time to time, they are feelings and they pass. I don’t give them the power to rule my life. Breaking free from victim mentality didn’t just happen. I had to work my ASS off! I had to fully commit to empowering myself from within. That is how I stopped being victim of anyone who wanted to have any power over what I did and how I did it.

Sometimes when people read “From a loving place”, they think light and fluffy. If you take a deeper look at the blogs that I’ve been writing since 2016, I face the world head on from a loving place. I don’t deny my feelings that are ugly and painful. I allow them to teach me what they are here to teach me. I look at what I’m feeling and dig into it. I don’t run, avoid, or numb what is going on inside of me. This is how I overcame victim mentality. I become a prisoner to the outside world if I’m not honest with myself. Not only have I done bad things when I was in that space, I’ve watched millions of people being swayed by the same psychology tapping into our alignment with fear, lack, and separation. That is the same place that victim mentality lives, breathes, and spreads. If someone is trying to convince me that I am a VICTIM, all my RED flag sensors go off. Being a victim can set off people’s rage, fear, and hate.

I took my power back when I became responsible and accountable for the energy I exude. When I took responsibility for this, I found ways to change my thoughts, beliefs, and actions to align with what I wanted to see more of. If I’m not aligned with love, abundance, and peace, there is no one else responsible and accountable for that. I have to make the commitment to shift my energy. I have to take responsibility for healing past hurts that keep my thoughts prisoner.

The number one person I had to stop being victim of was myself. That is how I kept my inner victim alive was because I kept abusing myself. When I abused myself, I invited others in to make me feel like a victim too. I became victim of the media, beauty industry, political parties, and even the fitness industry. I kept looking outside of myself to feed my inner victim. As I’ve observed people in 2020 and watched myself sliding down into a spiral, I’m so grateful I caught myself. Just because we have the tools not to be in the energy of fear, lack, and separation, doesn’t mean we will do the work. That’s what was happening to me. I stopped doing the work. That was no one else’s fault. I take responsibility for my slip, which is how I was able to find a solution. That is why I’m here today writing this piece.

Today, I commit to empowering myself. FromALovingPlace.com and my book, Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World are LOADED with tools to help individuals empower themselves. Empowering ourselves doesn’t mean disempowering anyone else. It doesn’t mean taking someone else’s power away. Empowerment is about rising together. We rise together when we become the healthiest versions of ourselves, because only from that place are we open to hear others clearly. When we are aligned with fear, lack, and separation, everything we hear, see, and feel is skewed with that lens. If we want to let go of our victim mentality, we have to be willing to look at ourselves without blaming and shaming ourselves for our missteps. When we do that, we only strengthen victim mentality. We simply need to practice empowering ourselves starting with treating ourselves the way we deserve to be treated. When we don’t treat ourselves well, we don’t have healthy boundaries. It’s very easy to become a victim of the outside world if we don’t have healthy boundaries safeguarded by the energy of love, abundance, and peace.

Not succumbing to victim mentality doesn’t mean we will never be victims again. What it does mean is that we will have the tools to see that the person who hurt us was the sick individual. Just because they want to take our power away by whatever avenue they are taking, doesn’t mean they can. I was shocked after I was harassed by an unhealthy individual. I said to myself, “He is not talking to me, he is talking to himself.” I also asked myself, “Do I want to take on his toxic energy?” I didn’t, which is why I made the decision to walk away. I knew that he wasn’t open to hear my words, so I wasn’t willing to risk my peace. Just because I made those choices, I still had to work through stuff happening inside of me, but because I didn’t give away my power, I was able to open my mind up to solutions that didn’t compromise my emotional and psychological well-being.

Living life from a loving place is a one day at a time and sometimes one moment at a time journey. Empowerment is a gift we give ourselves by doing the work. If you like what you are reading here, follow along daily by scrolling down and following FromALovingPlace.com.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #167

I’m grateful for the feeling of authentic joy. No matter what is happening around me in the world, I’m responsible and accountable for the the energy I’m bringing to the table. If I want to see more love, abundance, and peace in the world, that is the energy I need to give to the world. Authentic joy comes from the energy of love, abundance, and peace. When I feel the awe from nature’s beauty, whether it be in person or on a screen, I’m contributing the energy I feel to the world. When I hear people laugh over something pure, I’m contributing my energy of joy to the world. I’m taking care of my own body, mind, and soul by feeling the joy and the bonus is that I get to pass that energy on.

In our authentic joy, we are not trying to change anyone. We are just living in an energy that is aligned with love, abundance, and peace. When we are aligned with that energy, we attract more. Authentic joy can’t be faked. It can’t be experienced if we are submerged in the energy of fear, lack, and separation. If we feel it, in that moment, we are aligned with the best of what humanity has to offer. In the next moment, we may slip back into the energy of fear, lack, and separation if we cling to the past or fear the unknown future.

The more we appreciate each moment we get to experience authentic joy, the longer we get to experience it. If you use the moment as a launching point for the next moment, we can live in that space for as long as we can continue to hold the energy. That could be minutes, hours, days, or weeks. I love experiencing authentic joy, because I know in that moment I’m 100% present with the moment that I’m in. I’m present. Authentic joy happens only in the moment we are in. When I feel it, I honor the beautiful gift.

Today, I commit to appreciating moments of authentic joy. In the present moment, I can create moments for authentic joy. I have the world of awe at my fingertips. I can watch home videos that make me laugh; look up photos of nature’s beauty; get up and dance to my favorite songs; play a game with my kids; watch my dog get so excited over a dog treat; and so much more. I don’t even have to leave my house for any of that.

I’m not helping anyone else, or myself by sitting in the misery of the energy of fear, lack, and separation. When I’m there, I’m spreading it. The worst part is, I’m spreading it to the people I’m closest to. If they aren’t conscious of what is going on, they may absorb that energy, and spread it too. I have to be conscious of the energy I’m in if I don’t want to spread more fear, lack, and separation in the world. This means if I feel fear, I need to embrace that fear with my love. If my thoughts turn to lack, I have to re-focus myself on gratitude, which aligns me with abundance. If I separate myself, I need to do the work to re-unite myself with others by questioning my perspectives. I can only do these things if I’m honest about what is going on inside of me. If I try to numb, suppress, or avoid what is happening, I’m only feeding the very energy that I don’t want to see.

The way we buy into cult thinking is through the energy of fear, lack, and separation. This is how they get their loyal followers who are pigeon-holed into focusing on only what their leaders want them to see. The groups can be disguised in righteousness, but their energy is tied to our energy of fear, lack, and separation. Righteousness is an engagement in the energy of separation. It is not love, no matter what what we cut it. If we are justifying our own righteousness, we are engaging in our energy of fear, lack, and separation. Will most of us do this from time to time, YES. We have a beautiful opportunity to learn from our own energy when we do it. I encourage those who are feeling that in this moment to pay attention to what is going on in your body. Then, find something what makes you feel authentic joy. Feel that in your body. One of those is spreading toxic energy inside us, no matter how much we want to justify it. The other is healing and spreading light energy inside our bodies, and there is no justification required.

I’m no better or worse than any other human reading this post or not reading this post. I’m responsible and accountable for my energy. I’m spreading my energy no matter how I try to explain it or justify it. I’m not perfect at this process. I slip into the energy of fear, lack, and separation too. The only way I get myself out of it, so that it doesn’t have power over me is to do the work. The work is doing what I need to do to align with love, abundance, and peace. Experiencing authentic joy is when I know I’m FULLY and 100% engaged in it. I’ve learned to revel in the moments I’m there, especially during these challenging time. May everyone who is reading this get to experience authentic joy today. When you do, imagine that joy running through you and into the Earth to spread it to anyone who touches it.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

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Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #165

I’m grateful for my consideration of other perspectives. I honestly never knew how much of a gift this was until now. I keep watching people not willing to listen to each other and insist on their own way, which by my definition of love, is not love. So when we are not willing to listen, we are just feeding our own fear of the other. Just another way to feed the energy of fear, lack, and separation. We can do this in our relationships and our judgments of whoever we determine the OTHER is. If we think we are better or less than that OTHER, we disempower ourselves.

I choose to live in the energy of love, abundance, and peace as much as possible. That is where my perspectives of belief come from. I’ve read, heard, and listened to countless people express their perspectives from a place of fear, lack, and separation and love, abundance, and peace. The one thing that can feed both energy groups is feeling HEARD and understood. This DOES NOT mean we will agree. Once I’ve listened to someone, I get the opportunity to ask questions and insight critical thinking. I get the opportunity to share my perspectives. If they choose to attack me for my perspectives, I have the opportunity to call on my healthy boundaries. Healthy boundaries and considering other perspectives go hand in hand for me.

By considering other people’s perspectives, I will look at where they are getting their information. Is it media (perspectives, agenda, facts), courts (facts), public records (facts), conspiracy theorists (perspectives), politicians (perspectives & agenda), direct source (perspective), gossip (misinformation-just imagine the childhood game telephone), religious beliefs (personal perspective that differs from person to person even in the same organizations/groups), science (facts in the moment, agenda, and ever-changing with new information), etc.? I have to use critical thinking. I have to stay current with new science, because the field moves fast. This is why in school we weren’t allowed to use any research that was beyond five years old. I also learned that in some research, results can be skewed due to agenda and method. If we are aligned with fear, lack, and separation, our beliefs are often pigeon-holed to specific sources. I have to remember there is always a human and a human’s perspective coming from a place of love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation behind any information being spread, bought into, and absorbed. In order for me to stay aligned, I HAVE to listen to the information that I’m taking in.

Aligning with love, abundance, and peace allows me to keep my mind open, but it is not a veil of la la and everything is beautiful all the time. Aligning with love, abundance, and peace means keeping a clear head by making sure my energy field can’t be manipulated by people spewing hate agenda, fear agenda, divide agenda, and victim agenda. These agendas keep me prisoner. I want to make sure I remain free from the evil people in this world who use innocent people to do their bidding. There are plenty of social science experiments that show how good people will do bad things. Staying aligned with love, abundance, and peace keeps me protected from going along with agendas that expand the energy of fear, lack, and separation in the world. This is why I have to consider individual’s perspectives carefully.

Side note: Please, don’t misunderstand me, I’m not talking about someone who is unleashing their energy out on me as a form of abuse or harassment. Healthy boundaries are important to be able to know when my listening will benefit the greater good. I will be talking about healthy boundaries on day #166.

Today, I commit to considering other people’s perspectives. Here is some of the things I ask myself when I’m considering other people’s perspectives:

  • Is the person speaking wanting me to align with love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation?
  • Does the person speaking have an agenda to have power over the way I think?
  • How is my body reacting to what I’m hearing?
  • How many people or institutions do I have to believe or not to believe to go along with their perspective?
  • Is the person I’m listening to take accountability and responsibility for what is theirs or do they shift blame?
  • Does the person want me to put them on a pedestal (RED FLAG)?
  • Do they have public record, court, or scientific proof to go along with their perspective (shown, not spoken)?
  • Is this person engaging in gossip to spread their information?
  • Am I feeling aligned with love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation while engaging with this person? WHY?
  • What are other perspectives within their group saying (the one’s that don’t agree)?
  • Does the person have compassion, empathy, and forgiveness or do they push victim mentality, revenge, and us against them mindsets?
  • Is the person open or close-minded?
  • Is the person willing to listen and/or consider other perspectives of thought?
  • Does this person want me to hate a group of people? How does me hating the group of people give them power and create me to feel separate, divided, or victimized?
  • Is the person wanting me to focus on problems (fear, lack, and/or separation) or solutions (abundance- considering choices and options)?

If you are going to do this for yourself, make sure you have your definitions of fear, lack, and separation and love, abundance, and peace in front of you, but if your perspective of these definitions is skewed, so will how you perceive anything you hear. It’s important to be in a peaceful place and see how your body reacts to the definitions. If you’ve been following along on this journey, I’ve already given you tools to do this.

These questions may seem like a lot in the beginning, but they all become very natural. I use these practices every day. Considering perspectives keeps my critical thinking mind working. Some of the places beyond my personal relationships, I started realizing doing this was so important in considering politics, media, and religion. The group itself isn’t bad or good. The people within the group can be aligned with love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation. Knowing the difference is essential for me to know if I align with a person’s energy or not. A person who is aligned with fear, lack, and separation to the point of a psychosis like Narcissistic Personality Disorder or Antisocial Personality disorder—that person can use any venue to manipulate, abuse, and harass people because their personal agenda of power and control.

Example: If I believe that all media, politicians, or religion is bad, I’m living in the energy of fear, lack, and separation, because I refuse to see the humanity in the people within the group/field. I just need to use my critical thinking. I know that I’m looking for specific characteristics, which is one of the many reasons that I like studying people, because I don’t want to give my power away like I have before. In religion, I would see how some of the leaders would use shame tactics (fear, lack, and separation) and others would use love and compassion (love, abundance, and peace) to get their congregation to follow them. They could be from the same overall group, but the person leading took different approaches to how they interpreted and preached.

Years ago in the US, political parties and power grabs for position within a party became so based in fear, lack, and separation that I had a very hard time understanding where candidates actually stood. I didn’t understand how they could say such hateful things, then say, okay now let’s come together. To me, that is like my best friend telling me that she is being abused by her partner, then making up and telling me that I can trust him again…REALLY?! This is how adults leading our country are behaving. There are a lot of people behind a campaign, it is not just the candidate. So, I learned to dig deeper. I know the other side has an agenda for me not to like the other candidate, so I’m not going to go to them to determine what I believe about them. I dig into public records, court records, and voting history. I look for words that came out of their own mouths, and what people who have worked, lived, or been in close contact with them say about them. What I found is that individuals on both sides lie and/or choose perspectives of fear, lack, and separation. If a campaign is trying to get me to HATE a person, group, or side…I have to look at the agenda behind why they want me to hate them. My experiences of being abused by a narcissist and studying the disorder is that it has made me believe in actions over words for trust, and when words are used to hate, demean, belittle, abuse, hurt, incite violence, separate, or create victimization, I know that person is wanting me to align with fear, lack, and separation over me to gain control over may thoughts and actions. Many campaigns on both sides have used fear-based tactics.

Side note: For full transparency, I’m an independent voter who votes for the person I feel is most willing to work with the other party, because I believe in “United we stand, divided we fall.” These are my perspectives based on how I choose to live my life. When I sided with a particular party, I noticed that I narrowed my view on what I was willing to look at and hear. I felt like I got swayed too easy when I did that. So for me, it was right for me to take the stance that I did. I actually enjoy researching both sides. This election more than usual. Because of the political climate, there were tons of different very interesting perspectives out there. There were more people looking for more bipartisan politics (i.e. country over party perspectives). For someone who studies people and how their minds work, it was very eye-opening for me to see how people got to where they did. Some of the testimonials from these groups came from thoughtful critical thinking based on a unity perspective. Some came from fear/revenge mindsets, which is a given in today’s climate. Some were people really struggling to prioritize character vs. policy. Many people in these groups fell into this grey area of perspectives that I hadn’t heard much of especially since politics had become so polarized.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #164

I’m grateful for my continued growth. The last couple days, I’ve decided to gain understanding on cults. As much as I’ve studied psychology, social science, abuse, Narcissistic personality disorder, Antisocial personality disorder, etc., I’ve never spent time investigating cults on an educational level. Staying open to learn about what is uncomfortable in the human psyche helps me to be a better human. Many of the same tactics are used in abusive relationships are in cults. What’s interesting is the same techniques I’ve learned to keep me safe from falling prey to an abusive relationship again are the same as what keeps me safe from falling prey to a cult atmosphere. It has been interesting to get further understanding of where my vulnerabilities to become prey are.

Cults, just like abusers, need their followers/victims to be aligned with fear, lack, and separation in some way. They both can use love bombs as a way to disguise this to make fear look like love. They both preach victim and revenge mentalities to make followers/victims align with lack and separation. Both also use isolation tactics to only be fed what they want you to believe. I remember friends and family telling me that I was like a robot and/or just disappeared. They didn’t recognize me anymore. The same happens in cults.

The more I read, the more grateful I am I decided to take the path that I have to align with love, abundance, and peace. It actually makes me want to stay even more vigilant in these trying times to make sure my empathy, compassion, and forgiveness mindsets are intact. Sometimes, seeing the ugliest parts of humanity opens our eyes to what can bring out our best parts. I, like many, never thought I would have been the victim of abuse. At the time, I thought I was strong and independent. I didn’t realize I was self-abusing. I didn’t see that I was lost in the world of lack. I also didn’t see how separate I felt because of showing one side of myself to the outside world, while I was silently suffering internally. If you are wondering why I write about why it’s so important to be honest with how we are feeling inside, this is why.

My honesty with myself has been essential to my growth. I keep having to put myself in-check, which is why I keep writing these posts and stay open to learning from everything that is happening in and around me. In my latest examination, I learned a lot more about some of the actions I’ve taken as I’ve broken more and more unhealthy patterns in my life. I understand more about my empathy towards some of the people who others only feel vengeance for. Somewhere deep inside, I know that vengeance and revenge are paths that lead me away from love, abundance, and peace. They keep me in the energy field as abusers, cult leaders, and followers. It’s times like these, I’m grateful I grew up with Star Wars. When I talk about this, I often think of all the good points the movies made about the path of light (Jedi) and the dark side.

One of the things that has helped me is that I wanted to understand the answer to the question I’ve been asked, “If things were really that bad, why did you stay?” It wasn’t until I discovered layers of buried shame cycles and self-abuse that I would figure that piece out. Staying until the moment I did was a part of my personal journey that got me where I am today. Many people fall prey to abusers/cults unknowingly. Something feels normal and like home. There is a familiarity, and an energy of belonging. Our belief systems get aligned with the messages of fear, lack, and separation. We start not trusting anyone except who the source of power deems fit. We separate ourselves from everyone else. We grow in the energy that keeps us prisoner. Not just of someone else, but of our own minds and our own stories. I’ve been there. I was prisoner of my own mind longer than I haven’t been. I still have to do the daily work not to slip into the energy of fear, lack, and separation, but the blessing is the longer I do this, the more I learn and faster I catch myself.

Because of knowing what I’ve had to go through to get to where I am, I’m not going to give-up on and seek revenge on those who are having to experience wake-up calls. I cheer on wake-up calls no matter how long they take, because it can be the most pivotal experience that will help us to do the greatest good in the world. Waking up out of aligning with fear, lack, and separation is such an empowering experience, but that doesn’t mean the journey isn’t challenging. We have years of programming that align us with fear, lack, and separation. Stepping away and into the energy of love, abundance, and peace is a journey that takes time. This is why I celebrate my continued growth on this amazing journey.

Today, I commit to focusing on my growth. None of us are perfect. When I attended AL-ANON, one of the sayings was, “Progress, not perfection.” I’ve grown so much since the days where I felt like an empty shell. I continue to grow through the immense abundance of experiences I’ve been faced with in 2020 and now 2021. As I learn about others, I learn about myself. I’ve seen the difference between learning about myself and shaming myself. That was a HUGE one for me. 2020 gave me ample ground to learn new techniques of connecting with others and with myself. I’ve learned to set healthy boundaries without the need to explain myself. Today, I’m smiling from ear to ear. Today, I know how to show up for myself and others with my whole heart. The days I don’t, I know it and I know how to fix it. That is beautiful progress in my book.

In my growth, I’ve learned not to put others on pedestals. We are all human. We each have our journeys. I can’t change someone else, but I CAN and will continue to be the best version of me. I’m the only one responsible if I align with fear, lack, and separation or love, abundance, and peace in ANY moment. By taking that responsibility, I empower myself to change what I need to change to re-align my energy where I want it. That takes me changing my behaviors. Fear, lack, and separation blinds me, and I want to see. This is why I choose to be on this journey. My perspective is my power or my prison. Today, I choose to live in my power by aligning my energy with what expands my soul.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

If you are wanting to align your energy body, mind and soul for 2021, join me at Mad Business Solutions Virtual Planning Party!

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Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #163

I’m grateful to be a lifelong learner. I believe the best version of ourselves is being open to learn, shift, and grow in and out of beliefs that align us with love, abundance, and peace. If you are wondering what I mean by that, I mean there is never one way of aligning with love, abundance, and peace. We get to try all different ways and decide which way works best for us. If and when that way stops working or we just outgrow the energy, we expand and learn a way that works better for us. I love staying open to learning because that also means my brain is open to form new neural pathways. When I do that, I release more of the things that are no longer working in my life, and I teach my brain to work more efficiently for me. I find that pretty amazing! I love the classroom of life. Some lessons have been gut-wrenching, but I learned incredible lessons from being open to learn from EVERY trauma I’ve faced. I loved going back to school in my thirties after having been through so much. I feel like I got so much more out of the experience. I’ve faced moments of my own ignorance that made me a better person today, especially in the area of human rights. I learned as much from my classmates as I did from some of my professors.

I love listening to people’s stories, because their unique perspective has something beautiful to teach me whether I agree with them or not. As long as I’m aligned with love, abundance, and peace, I remain open to learn things that will better me. If I’m aligned with fear, lack, and separation, I will learn more and more to stay aligned in that energy. This is why I stay FAR away from FEAR agenda material. I can learn and become aware of the evils of the world by studying the psychology, cultural anthropology, cult mentality, and sociology without aligning with fear agenda.

Aligning my learning with love, abundance, and peace doesn’t mean I put my head in the sand. It means I research people, events, history, and perspectives with an open mind. I do my best not to put people in categories of groups. When I do that, I can’t learn. I can’t see. I’m denying a person their humanity of what brought them to where they are now, and that can mean for better or for worse. This is how we miss red flags when we believe us against them thinking. We get stuck in fear, lack, and separation energy. When we feed that, we don’t see that each person has an agenda. Some will use their agendas for good, and others will use them to keep people in fear, lack, and separation because they can control people better there.

I learn so much from where I’ve fallen into these traps and when I’ve watched others. When we are aligned with fear, lack, and separation our minds are closed to learn from love, abundance, and peace because the two energies don’t align. We can’t be in one and be open to see the other. If we are in fear, lack, and separation we aren’t even seeing a clear definition of what love is, because if we did, we would see what we are buying into doesn’t match up.

My blindness led me to ten years of being emotionally and mentally abused by a narcissist. By the time I got help, I felt like an empty shell. I believed I deserved the abuse. Everything I was learning about was linked to staying in the energy of fear, lack, and separation because that is how he kept his power and control over me. After many prayers asking for help, and reading books that started to open my eyes, I started to align with love, abundance, and peace. Miracle after miracle happened to open me up to learn and grow from the place of love, abundance, and peace. When I finally walked out the door. My heart was at peace.

I spent the next four and a half years in college learning everything I could about humans, their behaviors, passed down patterns, religious belief systems, history human rights, and psychosis. I keep my mind open to any place I can learn from a place of understanding instead of judgment. When I’m tied to beliefs that make me judge a person or group, I’m closed to learning and understanding that group. I strip myself of the ability to potentially help a person if I do that, and I love helping individuals who want the help.

I’m grateful to be a lifelong learner because it has also helped me to see that it’s okay to make mistakes. My mistakes don’t define me (no matter what someone else thinks). It’s what I do after I make the mistake that holds my growth potential.

Today, I commit to learning from what hasn’t worked and celebrating what does. We have to be open and honest with ourselves in order to do this. We have to be willing to see ourselves clearly. This is why I wrote my book, Letters from a Better Me the way that I did. We can’t learn what isn’t working until we open our eyes to fully see it. Then, once we see it, we have to accept ourselves and move into the place of forgiveness in order to shift into actions aligned with love, abundance, and peace. This is a process. This is why I write every day. I need to do the work to keep me in a growth mindset. This is why it’s important for us not to numb our feelings. I have to look at what my feelings are there to teach me in order for them not to have the power to control my life.

I’ve learned to take cues from my body when it’s telling me a thought or belief doesn’t work for me. If a belief comes from love, abundance, and peace, I feel expanded. If I feel a thought or belief comes from fear, lack, and separation, I feel restricted. One causes me stress and the other brings me peace. Be with the feeling whatever it is.

  • What is it there to teach you?
  • When have you felt this feeling before?
  • Do you remember the first time you’ve felt this feeling in your body?
  • Is any energy of fear, lack, and separation attached to this feeling?
  • What are some perspectives that could help you move into the energy of love, abundance, and peace?

We have to be willing to learn from what is inside of us because that is where all our outside beliefs and attachments come from. This is where we create our view of reality from. If we want to align with love, abundance, and peace, we have to see where we are still holding onto fear, lack, and separation. Remember, we can’t be in both energies at the same time. Wherever we are, is where our focus is. Which energy do you want to learn and absorb your life lessons from? The choice is up to us.

  • How do you want to live your life?
  • What have you learned that is working to align yourself with life you want to be living?
  • What isn’t working?
  • What do you need to change to make what isn’t working work?
  • Where can you go to learn more to help you change what isn’t working? If you don’t know the answer to this question, pray, meditate, and ask to be open to see the answer. Then watch for the answer to reveal itself. If you are open, it will. If you really don’t want to change and/or learn, it won’t.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

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Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #162

I’m grateful for my choice to step away from the chaos. I knew if I wanted to align my energy with love, abundance, and peace, staying in the chaos is not an option. Every time I slip down into the chaos, I’m aligning with fear, lack, and separation. I don’t think straight in that place. My focus is on problems instead of solutions. I slam doors instead of looking for ones that lead to better places. When I move into the peaceful mind, I see more options in perspectives. I listen to others who are speaking from the heart, even if that looks different. I don’t BELIEVE that what I think is the only way. Chaos closes the mind. Peace opens the mind.

Today, I commit to staying away from chaos. Today, I’m going to keep myself busy with self-care, spending time with family, and doing a project at home. Doing these things will help me keep my head in gratitude and contributing to the best version of myself who is aligned with love, abundance, and peace.

If you find yourself scrolling through chaos, whether it is in your mind or on one of your devices, come up with a list of things that you want to accomplish today. If you can add music that makes you feel good or a audiobook that keeps you in the mindset of love, abundance, and peace. At the end of the day write a gratitude list. Notice how much better you feel when you are focusing on what you can change. Instead of focusing your energy on the things you can’t.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

Do you need help starting yourself off on the right foot this year?

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Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #161

I’m grateful I have self-worth. When we don’t have self-worth, we become doormats, victims, prey, and attackers. Lack of self-worth attracts people and situations that align us with fear, lack, and separation. However we treat ourselves, is what we will make acceptable for the way we treat others and the way they treat ourselves. READ THAT AGAIN. The way we hurt others will look different, maybe we will gossip, abuse, personally attack, manipulate, demean, or judge them unfairly by not seeing their humanity. When we are acting in our healthiest minds, we don’t call names, we don’t ignite violence, we don’t blame everyone else without being accountable and responsible for our own actions. We do those things when we feel threatened or judged as less than, not enough, and wronged. Sometimes we are victim of other people’s poor choices, but if we have a strong sense of worth, we see them for who they are and we take responsibility for our energy that we are contributing—And show them the example of a person that doesn’t try to rise by taking others down.

Revenge mentality comes from aligning with fear, lack, and separation. Forgiveness mentality comes from aligning with love, abundance, and peace. It takes a great deal of self-worth to not seek revenge. If we find ourselves saying, “Well they did (blank), so they deserve (blank).” We all know that two wrongs don’t make a right. Healthy thinking can see that we can be a victim of something without taking on a victim mentality, which once again comes from fear, lack, and separation.

Now, after we ARE victimized, most of us won’t jump into a healthy self-worth mindset. I know it took me YEARS to tell my brain new stories. I know some don’t take that long, but I had to get to a very dark place in order to realize that my hate for others, no matter how justified it feels, is poison running through MY veins. I had to have the self-worth to be responsible and accountable for what I was allowing to fester inside of me.

I learned that I have NO control of what other people do, but I definitely know what I want to contribute to the world and what I want my legacy to be. Some days are better than others. Some days it takes me a little longer to realize how I’m treating myself by the energy I’m putting out there, but I simply do my best. I keep learning and growing. When my self-worth was non-existent, I couldn’t stand making mistakes. I attacked myself in the worst ways. Unfortunately others also get hurt in our wakes when our self-worth isn’t there, because we can’t see how dark we are being—It’s normal to us.

When I found my own worth, it helped me spot when other people were lacking it. If someone is attacking someone else’s value as a human being, I promise you that person doesn’t have self-worth. They may try to make people think they do by telling others how great they are, but someone who feels great about themselves, doesn’t think of themselves as better or less than any other human. If someone wants you to put them on a pedestal, that’s not someone with a healthy sense of worth. They don’t have to tell us how great they are by putting others down. When someone is secure in themselves, it’s obvious. They are aligned with love, abundance, and peace. That’s the gift of a healthy self-worth.

Most of us will not be able to stay aligned with love, abundance, and peace 100% of the time. There is a lot to learn from the times we slide into fear, lack, and separation. With a strong sense of self-worth, we don’t beat ourselves up for the slide. We recognize, apologize (to ourselves and/or others), and change our behaviors. When I started treating myself the way I deserved, other people treated me that way too.

Today, I commit to appreciating the person I am, just the way I am! I might have said this before, but it’s one worth repeating if I did. When I accept and love myself, I allow myself to be aligned with love, abundance, and peace. This makes my day go so much smoother. The reason is because I’m not spending time in the energy of fear of acceptance. I’m not spending my day in lack of what I’m not, what I can’t have, and what I think I deserve but I’m not getting. I don’t spend my day envying someone else’s life, comparing or resenting, which separates me from another human.

I know whichever energy I feed: Love or fear; abundance or lack; peace or separation—I MAKE THE CHOICE! It’s way too easy to fall into the abyss of chaos if my self-worth can be moved by someone outside of me. I love feeling empowered to make conscious choices to align my energy. I can only do that with a clear head. I love when I fill myself with the stories of how much I’ve grown, my strengths, my openness to learn, and the qualities that make me—ME. I’ve learned to appreciate the unique person I am. Today, I will spend time enjoying the person I love being and the only person I can be.

I give from a loving place when I’m not trying to gain worth in my doing for others. When my worth is already there, everything I do for others adds to my abundance of love, service, and hope. If what I say resonates with you, make sure to scroll down and follow me here on From a Loving Place.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2020

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

Today’s post is dedicated to my beautiful friend D.C. Stanfa. D.C, was one of the first people to write an endorsement for my book. She has walked with me on my path of getting my book published, getting back into public speaking, and sharing stories while her book was being shopped. Yesterday morning she passed away. She was a force of nature with one of the biggest hearts. She made me laugh regularly. She will be missed. Please send prayers to all the people grieving her loss, thank you. Rest in Peace, D.C. I know your spirit was too big for humanly form. Now you are free to SOAR!