Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #143

I’m grateful for the times I had with loved ones who passed. Life is a precious gift. The people we spend time with leave imprints on our souls. We are with the people we love as long as we are meant to be, if we expected more time with them than we got, we are fighting the reality that is. It’s a perception that can cause many people great pain that goes well beyond grieving. Years ago, I learned the importance of focusing on the time I did have. This perception of thought has helped me so much through times of grief.

Not everyone will understand it or want to believe this perception for themselves, and that is okay. We each have to find perceptions of truth that align with the lives we want to be living. My perceptions of focusing on the times I was given with a person help me to align with love, abundance, and peace. Even in my grief, when I focus on the the times I did have, I find peace in my heart. Expectations of more time or beating myself up over things I should have done, keep me in the energy of fear, lack, and separation. When I look back at all my loved ones who passed, I’m grateful for the memories I do have; I smile at the stories other share; and I feel blessed that I got the time I did. This doesn’t lessen their places in my my heart.

Today, I commit to celebrating the times I DID HAVE with loved ones who passed away. Around holidays and milestones I think about the loved ones who passed more than on any average day. It’s the memories of the holidays spent together, which usually were filled with joy and laughter. I know I’m not alone in this. In the past, I’ve written them letters; I’ve talked to them on walks; I’ve written to others about them; and I’ve went through old pictures and videos remembering the times I was given. Just to write this piece, I went through over 10,000 pictures tracking down special memories. I’m so grateful I have the picture and got the moments, even if some of the moments were shared through others. I have the memory.

I know loss can be extremely painful. I’m not saying that tears aren’t running down my face sometimes when I’m thinking about the people who are no longer with me, but what I love is that when I put my energy into celebrating the times I DID HAVE, as sad as I may feel, I still feel aligned:

  • I’m aligned with love, because I’m celebrating the memories.
  • I’m aligned with abundance, because I was given the opportunity to share love with someone else for however long I was given. I’m grateful for the moments I got.
  • I’m aligned with peace, because I know I’m honoring their legacy by living in the energy that keeps them alive in my heart and empowers me to keep doing the best I can.

My goal is to honor the lives of the people I love by living the best I can with the time I have left. I know by aligning with love, abundance, and peace, I’m doing just that. This piece is dedicated to all the people who have lost people they loved and are struggling. My prayers are with you.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2020

Author of Letters from a Better Me

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #140

I’m grateful for pictures. One of my favorite things to do this time of year is go through pictures. I go back through years worth of moments that I captured in time. I get to see loved ones who are far away and moments of firsts from mountain tops. I have over forty years of memories that I cherish. My heart expands as I look back to see how much my kids have grown; I laugh at the memories with friends; and I cry at my final memories with loved ones. Just writing about it puts a smile across my face. Each wall of my bedroom has pictures that inspire the best in me, which is the energy of love, abundance, and peace. I have my heavenly cheerleaders, mesmerizing scenery, and loved ones who bring joy to my heart. Anytime I need a break from any heaviness I may be feeling—I simply look around. I’m back to centered in the love that lies within me.

Today, I commit to taking pictures of moments I want to bring with me. Common knowledge tells us as we get older, our memories will fade. We have a lifetime of moments, there is no way we will remember them all. I love celebrating the moments I want to bring with me by capturing the moment. I love pulling up memories and timelines based on the pictures I’ve taken. I love that I have hundreds of picture of my life with my dad and stepmom who have both passed on. I love all the pictures of family members throughout history that guide me to who I really look like and get glimpses into their moments in time. I love the moment I caught with this mama deer and her fawn. Pictures can capture the AWE of a moment. These moments can help to re-align us with a moment we felt love, abundance, and peace to remind us how it feels. Once we feel the feeling, we can bring that energy into the present moment and let us help us move into our next with love in our hearts.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2020

Author of Letters from a Better Me

Remembering Trauma

How we use are minds to go through the remembering process of trauma can be a powerful tool to help launch us forward, or a cruel weapon to keep us down. What many don’t understand is the choice is ours. Our perception is our power. We can use it to lift ourselves up or to beat ourselves down. We get to choose thoughts of love or fear as we travel back in time. This is no easy task when the trauma is severe. Processing through the lens of love doesn’t mean that the memories won’t make us cry. The difference is when we process the memories through a lens of love—the tears ignite our souls. When we process the trauma through fear—we run into our darkness. 

How We Live is How We Remember

When we choose to live in our darkness (fear), we immerse ourselves in the fear, anger, rage, hate, resentment, greed, envy, and separation within us and in the world around us. Our energy attracts like energy, so we are drawn to seeing the darkness in others. We act as magnets because we need to keep pulling in examples of why the stories are valid. We live in a place of separation from ourselves, others, and the Universe. 

When we choose to live in our light (love), we immerse ourselves in the love, compassion, empathy, joy, forgiveness, wholeness, and inclusion within us and in the world. We connect to the best in humanity. We attract the light in others. We are making the stories we are telling ourselves valid and we are connected to ourselves, others, and the Universe. 

Can we fake it? On the outside, yes, but our magnetic pull comes from deep inside us. When we are not honest about seeing our own darkness, we may attract the wolves in sheep’s clothing (narcissists, abusers, sociopaths, etc.). We are running and we will be handed lesson after hard lesson to try to help us to move into the light, but as long as we keep telling ourselves to live in the fear, we stay in the dark.  

Why is How We Remember Trauma Important?  

The stories that play in our heads about our past experiences are more powerful than most people realize. Our memory of trauma can ignite buried feelings of shame, guilt, and fear that internally contribute to feelings of unworthiness, abandonment, and separation. There is a piece of us that may feel completely unlovable from the shame attached to an unhealed trauma. When we engage and swim in those feelings, they will permeate into our everyday lives and affect everything we touch. One unhealed trauma can lead to a life filled with resentment and separation, which often times leads to unhealthy addictions. Remember, like attracts like. When we hide from our own darkness, we are living in our shadow. We are caught in that dark tunnel of our minds. 

Here’s the awesome part, all it takes is one seed of light to come in and spread in order to help us start lighting our pathway out. That seed can come from a person, book, posting, place, event, video, story, meditation, therapy session, church service, tree, flower, etc.? That one thing can help us see more light. Eventually if we keep taking one step at a time out of our own mental prison, we become the light.

When we can look back at trauma without feeling the dread and hopelessness, but instead see what we learned from experiencing the trauma without the blame, guilt, and shame—we stop paying the steep price of living in the dark. We start finding hope in what was once madness. We see the strength in the survival. We begin realizing that we are not the traumas we survived. Our worth was there before learning the important lesson in life that the trauma taught us. Now, WE RISE in LOVE. This is where the best solutions come from. Remembering the trauma becomes a tool to help us live better and wiser. With that, we become the light. 

Getting Help

This isn’t an overnight process, and some of us may need a lot more help than others. There are plenty of tools and people out there to help. If remembering past traumas feels like a weight, here’s my suggestion to you:

Get out a Post-It, 3×5 card, or a piece a paper. Write down: “How do I become the best version of me?” Keep this question close to you, and be open to see, feel, and hear the answers. If you hear the same advice multiple times, you can guarantee the Universe is trying to help you.  Pay attention if people recommend specific books, therapists, practices, exercises, videos, articles, meditations, mindfulness practices, gratitude journals, courses, church services, foods, etc.  Just be open! Our worst enemy is a mind living in fear. Our greatest ally is a mind living in love. Be conscious of where your mind is. 

With Love and Gratitude, 

Rachael Wolff ©2019