HATE is HATE. LOVE is LOVE!

I’ve been listening and observing to what is going on in me and the world around me. These are my perspectives on what I’m seeing. Hate, no matter where it is aimed, is still hate. I can see this in every area: race, gender, religion, intimate relationships, familial relationships, workplace, law enforcement, politics, economics, sexual preferences, community, the list goes on. Hate is hate! 

Hate divides, separates, and causes horrible devastation wherever it touches. Hate destroys the person who is feeling it too. Think of the way our bodies respond to hate in just one day. Now, imagine that hate festering inside you for months, decades, and centuries. When we project out hate, it often lands on the people closest to us. Hate destroys relationships, communities, countries, and the environment. 

Love is love. Love opens people’s ability to see a person behind the category or title (including ourselves). Love allows space for connection, compassion, and forgiveness. No group, category, or label own love. Love can be felt by any individual who is willing to be vulnerable enough to look in the mirror and embrace their own beautiful being. Love is the purest light within in our souls. The path to seeing love lies within us, and we only can project out unconditionally (which is the only authentic love) when we see and love ourselves. We have to know love from the inside in order to see and recognize it in someone else. Love is a gift that keeps on giving. We sabotage anything we don’t feel worthy of. We have to know we are WORTHY of love by giving it to ourselves. If we depend on the outside world to give us love, when that love goes wrong it can quickly turn to hate because that love isn’t coming from a solid foundation. Love is solid when it comes from within.

Hate suffocates love. When I see people lost in their hate, I feel for them. I have compassion for them. I pray for them. Their hate doesn’t dampen my love. If I feel like I am taking on their energy, I have to remember that I am responsible and accountable for the energy inside me. If I’m that person projecting hate, I pray for me, and feel compassion for me. If I don’t want hate inside me, I have to do the work to return my energy to love. That can mean:

  • Set healthy boundaries for myself
  • Stop watching, following, and engaging in things that trigger feelings of hate
  • Remove myself from a person’s life if their energy feels dangerous to my well-being
  • Seeking justice by reporting wrong-doing even if it is within a group I am connected with
  • Meditate more to restore my sense of calm
  • Write out my feelings fully to be able to see them and work through them
  • Find a professional or a HEALTHY person/group to talk to who will help me move away from the feelings of hate
  • Remove myself from groups that amplify the energy of hate
  • Find a physical outlet to work through hate and/or rage’s physical hold on my body (swimming, punching bags, trampoline, running, lifting weights, basketball, “Dammit dolls”, punching pillows, martial arts, etc.)
  • Take deep breaths in and fully release them, because we hold our breaths when our energy is tensed up. That is NOT good for our brain or body function.

If my energy is attached to the hate in anyway, it becomes my problem. It is my job to fix whatever is inside of me that is not aligned with how I want to be living. It is my responsibility ALONE to change the energy that is moving through me. My life and the lives of the people I love are going to be affected by the energy I’m carrying around with me.

Even with all I’m aware of, studied, observed and practiced, I’m not perfect. I still have to do the work and be reminded that I’m responsible and accountable for the energy that moves through me. I still have conversations with my kids that involve how they saw something I did or said differently than what was intended. That is within my own home!! Let that serve as a reminder. People will only ever see us through their perspectives of truth (beliefs). We will only ever see others through our perspectives of truth. The question is: How do you want to see yourself and the world around you? Choose perspectives of truth that define how you want to live your life. Love is a CHOICE! Hate is a CHOICE! If someone else chooses to hate, that is on them. I know their is a lot of love in the world. I want to amplify and align with that energy, because that CHOICE feels ABSOLUTELY AWESOME to me.

With Love, Compassion, and Gratitude, 

Rachael Wolff

Author of Letters from A Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World
Available in audiobook, audio CD, ebook, and paperback
see FromALovingPlace.com/book for a list of retailers.

Unity is in Our Humanity

Sometimes we just need to listen. When we see each other’s humanity, we stop hating what we don’t understand. We tell our stories from our own personal experiences. Each person’s story is important, because they are our truths. When we realize that a person is speaking based on their own personal truths, we understand that we didn’t live their experiences, so we may not have the same truths. It doesn’t make one more or less real than the other person’s truths. Our truths are all perspectives. We make them our reality by believing them. We can’t help others if we first don’t listen to the truths that they are believing about themselves and about others.

When we look deeper, we see beyond the categories and labels. We see the pain, joy, sadness, trauma, happiness, fear, and love within each other.

When we connect there, we unite.

We become vulnerable as the storytellers and as the listeners. We start healing, growing, and expanding. We see that each of us have the ability to change perspectives of truth, beliefs, and thoughts that are no longer working for the life we want for OURSELVES. We can’t change anyone else. We can make choices that will help us live better with ourselves and others. It’s all in how we decide to write and tell our stories.

Successful memoir writers and biographers are masterful at bringing us on a journey of connecting through story. Think of all the stories that have helped you connect to yourself and others. Right now there are so many people offering their stories on Facebook Lives amongst other venues.

I’ve learned so much about where individuals are and how they feel. I sometimes have to look past their rage, because that is the symptom of the pain that is so much deeper. Rage surfaces from unhealed parts of us that become triggered by circumstances, events, others, and even our own self-abuse. I can clearly see if a person’s perspective is from a loving place or a fear-based place. They project whichever one they are living from even when the words are not matching up with the energy they are projecting out.

We don’t have to agree with other people’s actions or views, but if we want UNITY, we have to first see the humanity in each other. Back in 6th century B.C., Greek storyteller Aesop said “United we stand, divided we fall.” We’ve seen and heard these words uttered over and over across categories, titles, genres, and venues. If we want to unite, we can’t just want to see things from our point of view and expect the the rest of the world to fall into place. Unity is in our humanity. It is the ONLY part of us that will experience the same things despite our differences. In our humanity we feel love, fear, joy, hurt, happiness, sadness, encouragement, disappointment, etc. No person’s money, religion, country, politics, race, gender, or sexual preference matter if we connect through what makes us human…LISTEN!

There are so many layers to this. This is just a small piece of a very big UNITED puzzle. But without seeing each other’s humanity, we won’t complete the puzzle. There will continue to be a missing a piece. We will never ALL believe and see the world the same way, so if you depend on that for unity, you will only ever find it in small groups which will keep you divided.

The beauty I’ve found living from a loving place is that I don’t have to agree with people’s beliefs on ANY subject and still see their value. The lessons I’ve learned from other people’s cruelty don’t strip me from seeing their humanity. I see the mentally unhealthy person, and know that it’s not safe or healthy for me to be around them, but I still learn from their story about the dangers of living life through the perspectives of truth that they believe. I see how miserable their perspectives have made them and how it’s hurt their relationships with others. Seeing that person’s humanity helps me to see my own darkness and work on shining light in areas that can easily turn dark if they go unchecked.

If I’m triggered with fear, anger, rage, or hate, I see what parts of me I need to spend time with to heal, so that I don’t project my darkness out to the world and hurt someone else. I don’t ALWAYS do this perfectly, because that is not what the human experience is about. The human experience is about learning. How can I learn if I’m not willing to listen? So, even in my differences with others who want to live from a fear-based place, I still can find a place to unite, grow, and learn. I cannot unite the world, but I can feel united with the world, and I do.

We have arrived at a point in time where we have the ability to listen to people’s stories first hand from all different corners of the world. We have the ability to learn about people’s truths that our different than ours while being safe in our own homes.

If you are looking to try to learn from truths that are different than yours, I suggested doing a meditation first. This helps me to really try to listen to the person’s story and learn from it. I pay close attention to the feelings that are running through me as I listen and see where my thoughts go. I find feelings I’m united in even if they are coming from different perspectives. I listen to hear if their perspective is coming from love or fear. I LOVE when I find people’s stories who are coming from a different way of seeing the world from a loving perspective. Those stories make my soul sing and my heart soar. The love within me expands so much more when I find voices united from loving perspectives. I don’t know if this will be true for you, but when I hear people speaking from fear-based perspectives, I feel so incredibly grateful that I learned a different way of living. Listening to them reminds me of where I once was and how much I’ve grown. Seeing their humanity strengthens my conviction on the way I’ve CHOSEN to live.

I know I need the reminder that unity is in our humanity, because sometimes it’s easy getting stuck in the chaos of what is keeping us divided. When I’m there, it hurts. I feel anxious, disconnected, confused, angry, and sometimes even vengeful if all of that goes unchecked. I know what I need to do to bring me back to peace, and writing these words right now is a part of that process. Thank you for being a part of my journey.

With Love, Compassion, and Gratitude,

©Rachael Wolff 2020
Author of Letters from A Better Me
Available in audiobook, audio CD, ebook, and paperback
FromALovingPlace.com/book

I Can’t Change You, You Can’t Change Me

My beliefs have never been changed by force. Each perspective of truth (belief) I’ve changed in my life has been based on if that belief serves the person I want to be and how I want to serve others. When I was younger, I didn’t consciously see my choice in how I viewed myself and the world around me.

Certain beliefs made me feel tense, angry, and rage-filled. When I would think about the thought/belief, my whole energy shifted and I often would feel sick and depleted. It took me a VERY long time and a whole lot of seeds from other people that got me to see I was making choices in my perspectives that were holding me back and keeping me prisoner.

There were some so deeply imbedded that it took voices from the Holocaust like, Viktor Frankl & Elie Weisel. Along with people like, Martin Luther King Jr., Mother Teresa, Byron Katie, and stories about Jesus and Siddhartha to help me see that I didn’t HAVE to continue to feel this inner world of pain. Those people were just the tip of the iceberg. I’ve talked to millions of people throughout my life. I read thousands of books. Nobody changed me, but I got the seeds and made choices on what to plant in my internal garden.

When I was young, I thought the world was against me. That belief didn’t feel good to me, because I can’t control how anyone else views me. 

What I do have power over is how I view and treat myself and how I treat others.

If I’m believing something that makes me feel like a prisoner of my perspective, I work on changing that. I found that EVERY time I engage in a perspective based out of fear, I feel like I’m a prisoner. Here is an example of another change I made:

I used to feel like a prisoner when other people would judge me based on a category/title they gave me or that I am naturally.

I changed my perspective to the understanding that people are going to judge me from their own perspectives of truth. That has nothing to do with who I AM. I know if someone speaks to me in a category of ALL: all women, all trauma victims, all white women, etc. that person won’t come close to seeing me, a person is only ever looking at me through their own perspectives of truth. If they want to lump me in an ALL category— That is their loss.

I love and respect myself. I take responsibility and accountability for my thoughts, feelings, actions, and reactions.

IN THAT ENERGY, I FEEL FREE. In that freedom, I attract amazing people to my life from different genders, races, cultures, religious followings, political backgrounds, economic statuses, and so much more.The more open I stay, the more I change and grow. Not by force, by choice and action.

Though, no one else changed me, I didn’t change on my own. I got the opportunities to SEE through different perspectives. I got the tools to change. I could only do that by being open to listen to ALL different perspectives to see what fit and what didn’t based on the place I wanted to live from, which is FROM A LOVING PLACE. I’ve disagreed with many of people along the way who tried telling me how I “had to” or “should” think. I know that is part of their journey. I don’t have to make it mine.

I know from my education in science, religion, psychology, spirituality, and personal growth, I can’t project out what I don’t already have inside. If I wanted to live from a loving place, I had to love myself FIRST. I had to experience love from the source of self to even know what I was projecting out to the world. I had to find the voices of leadership through love and not fear.

I can’t make anyone else change, but I will do my best to project the energy that I want to see more of in the world. I will do my best to give the people who want to listen the same opportunities I got. I will listen to the voices of the unheard, and learn and grow from them.

I will keep choosing to do my best to contribute to LOVE in my thoughts, beliefs, actions, and reactions towards myself and others. You do you! I will be here to representing my perspectives of truth FROM A LOVING PLACE.

With Love, Gratitude, and Compassion, 

Rachael Wolff
Author of Letters from A Better Me
FromALovingPlace.com/book

What is True about Choices?

If you convince yourself you don’t have choices, you will CHOOSE to believe that is true.

If you convince yourself you ALWAYS have choices, you will CHOOSe to believe that is true.

I know which perspective I’m going to choose! Now, you get to choose for you.

Choices of Perspective

I’ve chosen both of these perspectives at different times in my life. One kept me a prisoner and held me under water. The other set me free. I refuse to believe I don’t have choices in how I view things. The perspectives I choose keep me from feeling trapped in any ONE thought or belief system. I LOVE THAT! I CAN CHANGE. I CAN tell others what has worked for me and what hasn’t. In the end, we each get the OPTION to believe whatever we focus our attention on. We will find ways to prove either side. Our perceptions of reality will ensure that. It all starts and ends within. 

I’ve made my choice to live by the voice that fuels the LOVE inside me. You can choose to tell me that is not possible in your life, and you will be right if that is what you believe to be true. 

I believed I was prisoner of my circumstances. NO ONE could convince me otherwise until I was ready to open myself up to see another way. That was and is my path to A BETTER ME.

With Love and Gratitude, 

© Rachael Wolff 2020

Author of Letters From A Better Me
Available in all formats and multiple countries
FromALovingPlace.com/Book

Letters to Corona: Part 2

Dear Corona,

Tick-tock, tick-tock; time.  Until you, I never noticed time the way I do now. I notice the time I waste and the time I unconsciously give away. I notice the power of the time I commit to myself and the people I love. I notice the importance of time we give to slow you down from touching the lives you will put in the ground. 

There is a power that comes from the time I’ve been blessed with, like the stem that sprouts buds then becomes flowers that inspire such beauty, and the caterpillar that take the journey through the stillness of the chrysalis to become the empowered butterfly—Time MATTERS! 

You have given me time while others have had to learn what it means to truly lose time. The time we think we have to say I love you. The time we think we have to connect—the time to say goodbye. Your lessons have showed me the importance of the time I have. Now it’s my job to make conscious choices of how I want to experience my time moment to moment­­.

I sit in the grass appreciating nature, the power of energy, and the connectedness of it all. I walk the road less travelled and am moved by how in silence I hear more, listen more, and take in more. 

When I’m home, I love with a clearer mind. I eat without the rush of having somewhere else to be. I listen with my whole heart, through the sadness, fear, joy, and love—I’m here.

Corona, you have changed my life in so many ways. I know I could focus on all the things you have taken away, but today I’m focusing on the time you’ve given me to live consciously.

With Love and Gratitude, 

A Better Me

© Rachael Wolff 2020

Letters to Corona: Part 1

Dear Corona,

When I started hearing how you were making it hard to breathe to the point where some are losing their lives, I wanted to blame you. When I heard how easy you were to spread, I wanted to blame you. When I heard that people were having to die alone and their families would never get to see their loved ones again, I wanted to blame you. 

Looking at you has opened my eyes to something so much bigger, and for that I thank you. You being here has helped me to see the ways many of us haven’t been putting humanity first. If we did, you wouldn’t have spread the way you have.  

I know I can’t go back, but what I can do is commit to be better from here. I can be more conscious of how I treat myself and others. I can look for ways my skills can help to make today a better day. I can do my part to stop allowing you to spread. 

I know that your presence has changed the world. I also know it’s up to humanity to make that change for better or for worse. I want to do my part so that all the people who have and will lose their lives will live on through the positive changes we choose to make starting now. 

My job is not to blame anyone for being where we are right now, but to hold myself responsible and accountable for my choices. I can only do this by taking this time you’ve given me to go within and pay attention to where I’m putting my energy. What changes do I want to see in myself and the world around me, AND what can I do about it? I will do better one choice at a time. 

I know that I want to see humanity rise up, so I will commit to RISE. I will be the best version of myself by putting my energy into what I can change, and that is me.

With Love and Gratitude, 

A Better Me

©Rachael Wolff 2020

Virtual Book Tour: Letters From A Better Me

How Quickly Plans Change

As you can probably imagine, my book tour was cancelled due to COVID-19 coronavirus. I get it, and I want to do my part by staying home so that healthcare workers can do their best and hopefully get a break in the near future. I will tell you, I have become very aware of how much I use my hands and how many people touch the same things I do. I’m sure like many others, my hands are cleaned to the verge of cracking, so I added a 20 second lotion ritual to my 30 second hand washing ritual.

Doing My Part

Since my book can actually help people through these challenging times, I REALLY wanted to find a way to get Letters from A Better Me out into the world. Perspective can definitely be what empowers us or keeps us prisoner right now, and Letters is all about becoming aware of where our perspectives are taking us and how to make sure they are aligned with the life we actually want to be living. This is CRITICAL in times like we are in right now.

Virtual Book Tour

I decided to make a series of videos which will include readings, practices, and tools from the book. You are welcome to ask questions and contact me here or in the comments below. Don’t forget to follow the blog via e-mail so that you will be able to see the latest videos.

When we go within, we empower ourselves to make the best choices and stay conscious and calm while doing what is best for ourselves, our families, our community, our country, and our world. I hope you will join me on this journey and make the choice to rise together. I’m committed to find the blessings and lessons that will make me a better human. Embrace the journey, because we are about to do deep!

Letter from A Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

Get it in paperback, e-book, or audiobook:

Http://FromALovingPlace.com/book/

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff ©2020

INTERNATIONAL WOMENS DAY 2020: Rising Up to Our Best Selves

International Women’s Day 2020

March 8th

A day to celebrate women in all our glory, strength, and empowered souls. A day to look at the contributions of women to our beautiful humanity set inside WOMEN’S HISTORY MONTH.

ARE YOU LOOKING DEEP ENOUGH?

Look beyond the surface of what our physical eyes can see. GO DEEPER! Explore the journeys. They will not always be as pretty as the end results we celebrate. The caterpillar journey is just as important as the butterfly. I invite you to sit within your chrysalis and self-reflect. What does International Women’s Day 2020 mean to you?

If we are not aware of the belief systems that make up our perspectives of truth (our beliefs), we are missing so much. We are interpreting the world through glasses that are not our own. It’s time to GO DEEP into the journey of what makes us who we are both separately and together.

CELEBRATE YOUR JOURNEY

What lessons have been the most impactful? Was it the times when things came easy or the times you were called on to RISE UP and be the change within yourself? What got us to the moments we celebrate now? What traumas were we able to use to lift our ability to shine as humans?

WHERE CAN WE DO BETTER NOW?

When I use the word now, I mean it. RIGHT NOW, what can you do better in this moment? If you are internally living in a place of lack, RIGHT NOW you could write five things you are grateful for and you have taken a step into abundance. RIGHT NOW you can write a friend a letter thanking them for what they contribute to your life. RIGHT NOW you can reach out to a business resource to help you deliver your message, product, or both. RIGHT NOW you can start looking at what is holding you back from loving that person in the mirror and start investing ways to fix it, whatever that means for you.

Our perspective is our freedom or our prison, our power or our weakness, our lack or our abundance, our empowerment or our oppression. We are making choices RIGHT NOW. Be conscious of what you CHOOSE. We don’t HAVE to believe anything that attempts to disempower us. Even if it lies within our own self-criticism.

RIGHT NOW you can write perspectives down that will serve you better than the ones you are carrying around with you. If you feel that tightness in your body, you are believing something that is not serving you. FREE YOURSELF! You are only ever a perspective away, but no one can choose the perspectives you are going to put your energy into. This is YOUR POWER—YOUR EMPOWERMENT!

DISCOVER YOUR AUTHENTIC EMPOWERMENT

Empowerment from a loving place is how we lift ourselves and the world. That is why I’m offering my readers a VERY special extra when they purchase and read Letters from A Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World in 2020. Send me any questions you have about the book and how to apply it to your life in the contact section (link). I will send you my personal response in PDF form so that you can easily print it out and use whatever tools I give you. Please feel free to reference page numbers and/or quotes if you want to take the conversation deeper. I invite you to go deep to reach your authentic empowerment, so that you can truly live your best life. PLEASE read the WHOLE book before you contact me with your questions. I want you to get the most out of the experience, and you can only do that with the FULL picture.

START NOW! If you still wonder if the book is the right choice for you, there are samples of e-book and audiobook are available in the link below.

making women’s history month matter

What will you do to make this month bring awareness, growth, perspective, and positive change to the world? This is a human question, it has no gender lines. If we want positive change, the answers must come from a place of love, not fear pretending to be love. Love lifts us all and fear takes us down and separates us. Make sure you are operating from a place that will lift you and the world.

With an ABUNDANCE of LOVE, GRATITUDE, and Appreciation,

Rachael Wolff

Who Is My Reader?

When I was asked in the marketing meeting about who I wanted to read my book, I thought every woman could get something out of it, since it covers romantic relationships, family, parenting, career, spirituality, addiction, unhealthy belief systems, and all things self. I also thought men could gain a lot of understanding and get a lot from it too, because it would not only give them tools, but help to better communication and empower themselves to make positive change in their lives.

For those who struggle in any unhealthy belief patterns, it gives tools to get out. For those who are healthy, it may help them see how their belief systems help them and give them a better understanding of those who struggle.

The book celebrates authentic empowerment. “Empower Yourself, Change the World!” When we see our own value, we lift others up and don’t tear them down. Authentic empowerment comes from love not fear. It’s about representing what we stand for and not putting our energy into what we are against (VERY IMPORTANT in today’s climate).

The marketing team said I needed to narrow it down to the one reader. Who was the one person I wanted to get through to with my book? I had the picture of the exact person in my mind. I want to get to the woman who is stuck in patterns of abuse, whether it be self-abuse or abuse from others, because self-abuse tends to lead to abuse (mental, emotional, or physical) from either bosses, partners, children, etc. We can accept from others the level of abuse that we give to ourselves.Some unhealthy patterns were passed down so unconsciously that we have to dig down to see them.

The book deals with what belief systems got us into the patterns that get us to act against ourselves in our lives and how to change them. There are so many reasons a person can choose to pick up the book, but if I can help that one person see their value and give them the tools to lift themselves out of living a life they are not passionately in love with, I’ve helped to make the world better.

When we help others see their best selves, it creates an unstoppable ripple effect. I would have never been able to write this book, if I didn’t have every experience I did, read every book that I did, and believe everything that I did. I’m continuously learning how to better myself, and I will until my journey here is done. With that, I’m able to continually give others seeds to help lift them as I get lifted.

At the time of this post, March 3, 2020, it’s been two weeks since Letters from a Better Me has been out and a little over that for the audiobook, and the audiobook is still in the Top 100 for Domestic Partner Abuse (link). My heart feels full knowing that people are getting the seeds I’m giving. I hope they choose to plant them and that they flourish into beautiful flowers. Life is precious, we each deserve to live lives we love.

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff

You can choose from one of your favorite book retailers here: http://FromALovingPlace.com/Book/

Amazon has the book on sale at the time of this post, and it’s the only place to get the audiobook (Audible).You can see a preview of the book and a sample of the audiobook when you click on the link below.

Audible Release Day of Letters from A Better Me

Today is a very exciting day for me. I love audiobooks, and today mine comes out. It feels surreal. The narrator is the wonderful, Kate Mulligan. Her voice is the perfect fit for this book. You can hear a sample when you click on the link.

3 MORE DAYS UNTIL THE PAPERBACK AND EBOOK RELEASE OF LETTERS FROM A BETTER ME!!!

Other purchasing options are Apple Books, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Million, Indiebound.org, Target.com, Walmart.com, and more.