Letters From A Better Me
90-Day A Better Me Letters Series
Part I: A Journey of Awareness
What Holds Us Back: The Unstable Foundation
Day 22: Becoming Aware of My Hate
I’m ready to start becoming aware of my hate. I realize now that I’ve been letting hate unconsciously guide me in a direction that I don’t want to be going. I’ve been acting in a way that is contributing to the cycle of violence that I’ve feared for so long. I know that my hate has been creating only more hate and I’ve been watching it build up inside of me.
I can see it on the roads when I’m driving in traffic. I can see it in my judgments of people who dismiss other human beings in front of them in the stores I shop in. I can see it when I think of words being used that make my skin crawl. I even see it when I think of textures of food. That’s just everyday ways I let hate seep into my life.
I haven’t even begun to cover my feelings about narcissists, sociopaths, child molesters, rapists, oppressors, chauvinistic leaders, murderers, and hate groups. I feel my body shift and stir as the thoughts of violent and hateful individuals work their way into my thoughts.
What I realize now is that I’m responsible for the energy that I’m letting into my internal world. I can’t make these individuals different than they are. My negativity isn’t going to change something in them, all it will do is change something in me and it won’t be for the better. I’m giving them the power over my thoughts and energy and that is the last thing that I want to do.
I’m committed to focus my energy on what I want to be feeling and spreading. I have to really become aware of when I’m not paying attention to the hate-filled energy building up inside of me. I will work to re-frame my thoughts to be more constructive. I will search out different perspectives that will help me stay in a loving energy.
With Love and Gratitude,
A Better Me
Rachael Wolff ©2019
Read today’s installment 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 22 – The Toxic Foundation of Hate