Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #211

I’m grateful for the people who show up and the ones that don’t. I used to hold grudges against people who didn’t show up when I thought they should. I would get so angry and feel let down on a regular basis. Living with these resentments kept me aligned with fear, lack, and separation. I chased away good people in my life because my focus was on the people who WEREN’T there, instead of focusing on the ones who were. I’m so thankful that many of those people came back into my life when I aligned with the energy of love, abundance, and peace.

Here’s what I’ve learned: the people who are supposed to be there, always are. Not always in the way of future sense. I mean, the person or people who are there for us in a moment in time are the ones who are supposed to be there. If that wasn’t the case, the reality of the situation would be different than it was. If someone doesn’t show up that I thought “SHOULD” be there, that is my ego. Who am I to say they should be there? They were meant to be exactly where they were because that is a part of their journey. They weren’t meant to be there for me because they weren’t there—THAT’s the reality!

So many amazing blessings have occurred in my life because of a person not being there, because it made space in my life for the people who were. I trust that when I speak at virtual event, everyone who is supposed to be in that room is who is meant to be there. If a friend tells me that they got tickets and they don’t go or something comes up…it’s because they weren’t supposed to be there, otherwise they would have been there.

People have asked me if I get mad at friends who haven’t read my book. The answer is no. The people who read my book are the people it’s for. If people don’t read my book, the book wasn’t for them, at least right now. If they pick up the book years down the road, well than the book was meant to be a part of their journeys.

I love how it feels to put my energy on the people who do show up, and be grateful for the ones that don’t because if it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t have the space to appreciate the people who are there. People can pop in and out of our lives. I trust if someone is meant to pop in, they will. If they are meant to pop out, they will.

Another beautiful lesson I’ve learned is when I think someone “should” show up and they don’t, I have to look at my expectations of that person. If someone’s actions aren’t aligning with their words or I don’t feel aligned with love, abundance, and peace when I’m with them, I need to ask myself: Do I really want this person to be there? When the answer is no, them not showing up is a blessing that led to self-discovery. That leaves an opening for more people to show up that ARE meant to be there.

Right now my life is filled with all kinds of people who bring different gifts to it. I truly believe they are Godsends. If I get a call from someone who needs a friend and I haven’t talked to them for months or years, I believe if they reach out to me, it’s because I’m the one who is supposed to be there. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be available or they wouldn’t have even thought to reach out to me. There are no grudges—only what is. That is reality.

I’ve discovered that I don’t have to create stories about people showing up or not. I just sit in gratitude for both. I’ve learned from both. I’ve been challenged by both. But through it all, I’m blessed by both.

Today, I commit to appreciating the people who do and don’t show up. Just writing this piece makes me grateful for both. The pandemic created some distance between some friends and brought me closer to others. I’ve met so many new people since this pandemic began, and if other people didn’t go on their own journeys, I wouldn’t have had the space in my life for the ones who are here right now. The people who are in my life right now are EXACTLY the ones I need to be there, until they aren’t. I have regular calls with people and I have people who pop in from time to time.

Here’s something really cool about being in this energy…Just as I was typing the words above, a notification came on my screen. One of my friends who I was thinking of in the very moment, responded to a comment I made on social media. She showed up in perfect timing to deepen my appreciation. I stopped to text her and we shared a moment of connection. This is such an amazing journey. The reason I love being in this energy of appreciating both is because right now my heart is overwhelmed with the energy of love, abundance, and peace. Tears are filling my eyes because I feel so blessed. It’s that beautiful reminder that everything happens in perfect timing.

I love knowing when I’m meant to be there for someone else, because I will be the one who is there. I don’t have to feel bad or guilty for the times I’m not there, because I know the people who were meant to be there were. If the person was alone, I know that was a part of their journey too. I’ve had a lot of beautiful lessons that came when nobody showed up. I take that as a sign I needed the space to connect spiritually. I feel very strongly that if a another person or I don’t show up, it’s because my journey is taking me somewhere else and so is theirs. Why spend time in the energy of fear, lack, and separation over that? I rather stay in the energy of love, abundance, and peace.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World (click title for more information, formats, and purchasing options)

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #96

I’m grateful for my ability to face reality. Here’s where the power of our perspectives really comes into play. How we look at what is in front of us, can make us or break us. Our perspectives on the reality we are facing will make us a victim, or it will empower us to be our best selves. Byron Katies says, “When we we fight reality, we lose 100% of the time.” If we want to live empowered lives aligned with love, abundance, and peace, we have to face the reality in front of us. I’m grateful I have the tools to do that. What happens outside of us doesn’t matter as much as what happens inside of us. Whatever the reality is in this moment, I will face it head on and find ways to shine my light. When I face reality, I empower myself to do the best I can in the moment. If I need to meditate, I meditate. If I need to write perspectives out until one brings me peace, that is what I do. I can only be the change if I’m living the change within me. Everything I’ve ever experienced has helped to mold me into the person I am in this moment. There was a lot of ugliness in my past. It taught me to embrace my reality whatever it looks like in the moment and learn as much as I can from the experience. I’m not going to say it was easy, or that I wasn’t praying on regular basis for guidance on what to do. I stopped fighting reality, because it just doesn’t serve me or anyone else when I resist what is.

Today, I commit to navigating the reality I’m faced with in this moment. We can wonder why things happen the way they do all day long, but where does that get us? We can make up story after story resisting the reality we are faced with, but how does that help us? No matter what we expect to happen in life, what is IS what is. The questions I ask myself are:

  • What can I do with what is now?
  • How can I serve from the place I’m in now?
  • How can I be a better me now?
  • How can I contribute to the energy of love, abundance, and peace now?
  • How do I take care of myself body, mind, and soul now?
  • How do I support my fellow humans now?

We can’t control what is happening in the world around us, but we can decide how we want to contribute to it from a a place of love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation. Our thoughts and stories we spin in our minds (perspectives) will create our feelings. Our feelings will create the energy we project. The energy we project will come back to us amplified. Choose wisely. If you don’t like the stories you are weaving, write down some new ones that feel better. Stop yourself in your thinking and ask yourself, HOW IS THIS THINKING SERVING ME? If your thinking is depleting you, who is that serving? You are the only one that can change what is going on between your own ears.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2020

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms World

Get Rid of that Committee Spreading Lies

You are AWESOME!

We become what we tell ourselves we are, and then we shape how we view our reality around our perception of ourselves. We have to stop letting that negative committee up there tell us how to see our reality. Our perception is everything!

We can’t just say and spread positive messages to the outside world and expect things to be good. What is happening inside our minds is what matters. We train our brains to see what we are focusing on. Make sure you are fixing the messages you have programmed in there if you want to see real positive change in your life.

Are You Wondering How?

The fastest method I used to retrain my brain to focus on what I wanted was through gratitude and writing three things I liked/loved about myself daily. Doing the combination of these two things (consistently) for a period of at least 35 days or more can reshape your reality. If you haven’t stopped hearing the committee, it means you’r not ready to stop.

If that committee is really strong, you will have to be smart and use your creativity to shine light on them. This may mean digging in deep. Be open to hear where you are being led. If you really want to change, you will get signs showing you the way.

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff ©2020

29 DAYS UNTIL THE RELEASE OF LETTERS FROM A BETTER ME!

#PerspectiveChallenge: I, We, He, She, They, or It Should Have

PERSPECTIVE: I, WE, HE, SHE, THEY, OR IT SHOULD HAVE

We can give should a lot of power over our lives if we are not careful. I don’t care who we are shoulding. When we should a person or situation, we are fighting the reality of what is. Shoulding is a form of shaming ourselves and others. I used to use should haves to beat myself up in ways way beyond what anyone else could ever do to me. I used should to keep me prisoner of my self-proclaimed pity party. I also used should haves against other people and situations to keep me prisoner of my past and to punish them.  The should haves create toxic energy. The question is, do you really want to be carrying that around? If we carry that energy around with us, it will unconsciously seep into what we feel, think, and do. 

What should have been is an illusion and a toxic one at that. It is NOT reality. What happened is what should have happened, because it is what happened—that is reality. What are we going to do with what happened? No reason to waste time and energy on on should haves. Empower yourself and your energy to move you to make the changes you can make right now.

If we didn’t do something:

  • What did we learn from not doing it?
  • Are we committed to doing better next time?
  • What can we do right now to help us to move past our learning experience (let it go, forgive ourselves, pray, express gratitude for the lesson, etc.)?

If someone else or others didn’t do something:

  • What did it teach us about the person and/or group?
  • What choices do we have in the present to change the affect of their actions on our lives? 
  • How will be proceed with this person and/or people (accept, forgive, walk away, stand up to, report, etc)?

If we believe something should have been different:

  • What lessons can we take from the situation? 
  • What positives came from the situation?
  • How can we shift our energy to accept the reality of the situation?

TODAY’S PERSPECTIVE CHALLENGE

Challenge yourself to shift your perspective from should have to a more productive energy booster for you. Anytime you hear should have pop into your thoughts—challenge it. Ask yourself questions like the ones up above. See how your energy shifts. Be conscious of how you feel when you think should have

  • Where do you feel it? 
  • How does that feeling move through your body? 

After you have gained perspective, check in again. 

  • How does the thought feel? 
  • Where do you feel it? 
  • How is it affecting your mood to think about learning instead of fighting the reality of what already happened?

Have a perspective-filled day!

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff ©2019

What We Tell Ourselves is Our Reality: Time to Take Our Power Back

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We create the world we live in. Yes, we are that powerful. It all starts with a stream of thought and where our focus is. How is it that twins who grew up in the same household can go off to lead such different lives? How is it possible for some in poverty to break down the barriers and rise up, while others fall? How is possible for some people to find the love, careers, and lifestyle they want and others struggle? How do some people feel like victims of the world and other feel like participants in the journey?

It all begins with the messages we feed ourselves.

  • How do I use my words?
  • Do I speak in the positive or negative more?
  • Do I focus my attention on stories of successes or stories about tragedies?
  • Do I see possibilities or obstacles?
  • Do I question my reactions to others?
  • How do I judge myself?
  • How do I judge others?
  • How do I participate in life?
  • Do I work hard or smart?
  • Do I try to lose weight or create a healthier lifestyle?
  • How do I treat myself?
  • Do I put more values in others than I do myself?

These questions only tap the surface, but how we answer each one dictates the life we are creating. Old patterns of thinking take time to break. Some of these may have come from the generations before you. Investigate your current beliefs and break free from the past ones that hold you back.  Here are a few ideas on how to improve the life you are creating:

  1. Make  lists to change your thinking to a more possibility focused outlook. I have used it for love, work, family, spirituality, self, money, and school. I am amazed in the changes  every time. When I can make a list of all the positive things I want my life, I know what I am working towards.
  2. Write a Letter the God of your understanding,  a friend, or a family member like you already have what you are wanting in your life. Pick on area to focus on so that you can give it your full attention and energy. Go through the feelings of having it in your life. Use ALL your senses. This will help ignite every part of you in the process. Make sure to write about the details of how things look, smell, taste, sound, and feel. Create scenes where you can use each sense. If you can’t see the life you want, you are giving away your power to create it. Remember to leave it open to be better than you can even imagine. This will give it space to grow above and beyond.
  3. STAY AWAY from focusing on what you don’t want. If you know there are certain qualities that aren’t appeasing to you, focus on the ones that are their opposite. Instead of focusing on losing weight, quitting smoking, or ending toxic relationships focus on the actions of a healthier lifestyle. You don’t want to see the excess weight, the smoking, or the unhealthy relationship. What does the opposite look like to you.
  4. Expand your tool box. How do you plan on staying in this positive mindset? What books will help you focus on the life you want? What exercises will benefit this life the most? How do you need to change your eating habits? What videos would you like to see on-line (If you haven’t been introduced to the world of Ted Talks check them out). We don’t have excuses anymore, it doesn’t matter how our life looks to anyone else. It only matters what you want your life to look like.
  5. FEEL! Covering pain with outside substances will only accentuate the problem and keep you farther from the solution. When we allow ourselves to fully feel the joy and the pain it will help move us to a better place. When we use things like drugs, alcohol, or other people to cover up what is going on. It lays stuck creating diseases, illnesses, and despair. It steals our hope, joy, and power. I’m not saying not to enjoy a cocktail or a companion. Just don’t use them as a tool to cover up what you are really feeling.
  6. Allow yourself to grieve the losses of the old life. This is the life you have lived for a very long time. It will take time to release it. It will happen in stages and you may feel the loss of the walls of protection you put up around that life. Be gentle with yourself. What I have noticed is I will create a situation with another person, where I find myself facing that part of me. Patterns keep repeating until we are able to fully release what is keeping them there. See the opportunity to learn and the progress you have made.

    “If we do not suffer a loss all the way to the end, it will wait for us. It won’t just dissipate and disappear. Rather, it will fester, and we will experience its sorrow later, in stranger forms” -Elizabeth Lesser, Broken Open p. 99

  7. Record your progress. Even when you have a bad day, which you will, find something in it to contribute to the life you want for yourself. Notice as much as you can to be grateful for in each day. Take charge and put your energy into where you want to go while being grateful for what is already here.

Photo Credit: Rachael Wolff