The Writer in Me

Middle school was where I truly began to appreciate the power of the pen. I honestly thought I was stupid until essay questions became more standard on tests. The biggest complaint I would get is there were too many details, but little did they know that was just my divergent brain taking in the limitless possibilities.  Language Arts was the one class I could count on to disappear in a piece of paper. 

Freshman year in high school, I just got out of a treatment program.  I loved it there. I felt like I was in the safest place in the world. I knew what was expected out of me. I was given more responsibilities and privileges the harder I worked, and I got consequences when I broke the rules. I knew what to expect from the time the morning alarm sounded until lights out. To me, it felt like I was wrapped in a cocoon protected from the outside world. 

Leaving the safety of the program was overwhelming. I was used to sitting in my little cubicle quietly doing my schoolwork—No opinions, no discussions, just reading and answering questions. There were no judgments from other students because none of us were on the same material. Even then, I loved learning. There was a safety buried somewhere within the knowledge. 

My freshman Language Arts teacher assigned us a poem about a flower. I wish I had kept that poem. It must have been dark because somehow he could see how I was feeling through what I wrote. He pulled me aside and told me that poetry was like a secret language I could use to get out how I was really feeling. That’s when I started writing poem after poem. 

Poetry helped me find the rhythm in my words. That skill would pay off in many ways through school and through out my multitude of careers. I much prefer to write out what I’m thinking and take people on a journey through the words.

My senior year of high school, I had all my necessary credits to graduate, so I took an independent study of poetry. Many people thought I would pick this one L.A. teacher whom everyone loved. I picked the one that most people dreaded and feared. She was tough, and I knew she wouldn’t let me get away with anything. I wanted to be pushed beyond my comfort zone.

By the time my senior year ended, I had written over one hundred poems. They went to some of my darkest places and helped me to process some of the traumas that tore up my soul. Poetry was the safest place for me to explore my darkest corners. 

By the time I was twenty, I was writing training programs. By twenty-four, I wrote a monthly sales column in an indoor tanning magazine, and by twenty-five I was writing business proposals for more money than I could imagine at the time. Yet, the writing didn’t ever touch me like the dance I had with poetry.

Then just like that, the darkness crept in and I somehow I forgot how to expose it to the light. I forgot how to dance. The dark period would last for years. Then through a series of traumatic events, I picked up my pen and began to write and write, but instead of poetry it was letters. I would write and burn letters to process all my pain. 

With my writing came more healing than I ever knew I needed. I wrote my way into and through college loving every minute of it. I learned so much about technical writing. I thought it would be fun to take a creative non-fiction course. Little did I know it would be one of my most challenging courses, but I was bound and determined to do my best. I sat in a room full of the most talented CREATIVE WRITING MAJORS— I a Human Development major. Let’s just say, I had to REALLY learn to be more flexible with my writing fast. I felt so over my head. They didn’t let me drown, and I’m so grateful for each and every critique. I felt honored to hear, see, and feel the talent in that room. With that, I learned how to dance a different dance of words. 

FromALovingPlace.com was born from deep inside of me; a calling from my soul that has allowed me to continue my dance with words. The writer in me calls me to write letters, gratitude lists, blogs, sayings, articles, and now books.  My dance begins the second my fingers touch the keys. I started today’s post not having any idea what was going to come out, I just started to dance and my fingers took over. 

I allow my passion to take me on this journey daily and I feel full and abundant.

Thank you to all the teachers and professors who taught me how to turn on my light and dance with words. 

With Love and Gratitude, 

Rachael Wolff ©2020

40 MORE DAYS TO THE RELEASE OF LETTERS FROM A BETTER ME!

Rachael Wolff: Here’s My Why

MY WHY

I believe that the healthier our thinking is the more good we can do in the world. When we become more conscious of what is going on inside of us, we are empowered to make better choices for ourselves and the world around us. 

I didn’t come up with this belief. It’s been written about for as long as people have been passing down stories. It’s been studied over and over again. Yet, for some reason, the majority of us resist it out of fear. With that, we keep trying to use fear and accept fear-based thinking to guide us. You see this in our social media, news, politics, and daily interactions with others. 

Even though this has been written about time and time again, the way some people try to get us there is through fear.

Since many individuals are stimulated to move and change through fear, why wouldn’t this method work? 

When we do things from a place of fear, we are NOT focusing on the energy we want. We are focused on what we don’t want. Here’s an example, a God-fearing individual might do things because they don’t want to go to hell. That is a fear-driven way to live and when we fail, get lazy, resist, or make a poor choice, our fear kicks in to high swing and we belittle ourselves and start a shame cycle.  We are not worthy of God’s love. We are not worthy of getting into heaven. 

Not all religious practices are driven by fear, and some have changed it’s messages over time. Even with the changes, individuals still will take the route of shame and fear-based living because they are unconsciously living with beliefs that have been passed down from generations even if the belief has been proven unhealthy or false—The beliefs are embedded. This isn’t just tied to religion. This can be tied to ANY belief system we hold. 

WHY FROM A LOVING PLACE?

This is WHY I do what I do, write what I write, practice what I practice, read what I read, etc. This is WHY I named this blog, From A Loving Place and named my book, Letters from A Better Me. My Why represents the work of thinking from a loving place, believing from a loving place, and doing from a loving place. My goal is to help others open themselves up to live from a loving place too. The larger the community we have living from a loving place, the more our conversations will change on social media, in the news, in politics, with each other, and in the world. This is not a fluff or woo-woo conversation. We can choose to live in fear or love at any minute of the day.

What is wrong with our thinking that living in fear has become an acceptable norm and living in love is woo-woo? 

I know I’m not alone in my why. I see it in the social media I focus on. I see it  in the stories and research I spend my time reading. I see it in  many of the people I choose to have in my life. When I feel better about me, understand where my shadows come from, and see the power my light creates—I soar. I then connect to the energy and people who feel this too. It’s amazing how many amazing people have come into my life since I started connecting to my why.

MY JOURNEY

I’m on a transformative journey. I’m open to learn and grow, so I can pass on what works for me. It doesn’t have to work for you. Our whys don’t have to be the same. I have plenty of friends and loved ones who don’t have the same why. What we do have is some of the same joys, laughter, experiences, triumphs, lessons, fears, sadness, humor, sarcasm, love, happiness and sorrows. Those are the things that connect me to others. When I choose to connect and live my why, I feel free within all those connections. I don’t take our differences personally. I know how I want to live, and I know that I’m making my choices consciously. The healthier I am, the healthier my relationships with others are.  I also am clear on healthy boundaries and trusting my gut when I don’t feel comfortable around particular people. It all works together. 

My happiness in my life comes in large part to figuring out my why. My why is what guides me in my daily choices of how I want to be living. It helps me to learn from my fears, and to change what doesn’t work in my life. This doesn’t mean I ALWAYS choose to live in my why.

WHEN I DISCONNECT FROM MY WHY

I learned important warning signs for when and how I would fall out of living my why in a 12-Step program called AL-ANON.

H.A.L.T.

  • Hungry
  • Angry
  • Lonely
  • Tired

H.A.L.T. is a reminder to check-in with ourselves when we are feeling emotionally triggered. It’s the reminder to stop, take a breath, and reflect. When I’m experiencing one or all of these things, it’s a struggle for me to live my why, because I’m irritable. I take other people’s actions personally. I also, play fear-based messages in my mind because my lack of focus is guiding me to unconscious living. I’m not perfect by any means. I’ve screamed at my kids, I’ve blamed others, I’ve held personal pity-parties more times than I can count, but I do all of this when I’m lost somewhere in the hungry, angry, lonely, and/or tired. I don’t want to take care of myself when I’m there, so I’m not present. I’m defensive and lost somewhere in my unhealed past or the unknown future. My head is definitely not where my feet are. 

When I realize that I don’t like the space where I am, I have HALT to help me find my way out: 

  • If I’m hungry—I eat.
  • If I’m angry—I write, exercise, dance, or talk to someone I trust not to commiserate with me but to help me be responsible and accountable.
  • If I’m lonely—I write a gratitude list, call a friend, hug one of my kids, write a letter to myself, or go do something I love to do.
  • If I’m tired—I sleep and if I can’t sleep, I meditate, get on my Simply Fit Exercise Board, or go outside and walk. 

These are just a few of the tools I use to get me back to living my life from a loving place and showing myself the love that I deserve. This is how I get my thinking to a healthy place, so that I can make the best choices for myself and with that—the world I live in. 

DEFINE YOUR WHY

Take the time to define your why. The how, what, where, when, and who hold more meaning when we allow our why to lead us on our journeys. We start understanding that we have to stumble to learn. We don’t have to let our stumbles define who we are, we can let the lessons we learned be our driving force to make better and wiser choices.

WHAT’S NEXT?

 If you feel connected to what I’m saying, make sure to follow the From A Loving Place blog. You can also follow me on Facebook.com/FromALovingPlace for daily inspiration to help you stay connected to your WHY.

I’m also very excited because I will be speaking in St. Petersburg, Florida at Dream Con on February 29, 2020. This will be my first event after my book, Letters from A Better Me launches in 45 days (Feb.18, 2020).  You will also be able to find me in Atlanta, GA at Phoenix & Dragon Bookstore from 4-6PM on March 15, 2020 for a book-signing event. If you can’t make it to see me in person, the 35-Day A Better Me Boot Camp’s next session will be available in March 2020. 

With Love and Gratitude, 

Rachael Wolff ©2020

Please feel welcome to connect with my on my author Facebook page (click on link to be connected). 

Dreams Coming True: Becoming the Butterfly

Dear Dreamers, 

I’m writing this today simply because I am beyond excited for what is going on in my life right now. As I reflect on my journey so far, I’m simply amazed at how each and every event in my life has played such an important role in where I am right now. If you follow my writing, you understand that I use nature a lot to make sense of the journey. I want to bring you into my mind’s garden.

My Internal Garden

As a child, my garden was filled with weeds, smuggling vines, and invasive species that tried to kill off any of the beautiful life I would try to plant. So much so that it almost smuggled the life right out of me. It was in 1996 when I realized that I could clear out some of these weeds. That’s when I was launched into a career of public speaking. I planted flower after flower and tree after tree, but what I didn’t realize is that because I didn’t fix the foundation my garden was on, one day I would sabotage this dream come true. 

Those smuggling vines took over my garden once again and I went on a downward spiral. I had so much to learn. Looking back I’m so grateful for all my lessons in my time of darkness. I was living life as a caterpillar that spewed toxic venom because of the environment I created. There were still trees of life and wisdom trying to survive which would lead me to seek help when I was desperate enough to realize that I didn’t like the person I had become. Looking back I was given so many amazing seeds during this time, and it was a message from a pastor that finally led me to really invest myself in not only cleaning up the invasive species from my garden, but to clean up my foundation so that my trees could grow and provide the food that the caterpillar needs to transform into the butterfly. 

His message was that we only allow ourselves as much happiness that we believe we deserve. If we exceed that level of happiness, we will sabotage it. 

You better believe I started getting really dirty in my garden to figure out why I didn’t believe I deserved happiness in my life. As I dug deeper, and got dirtier, the work brought me peace. The more peace I found digging in my garden, the healthier my soil became. I started taking care of those seeds that were given to me. My caterpillar self, started to build a chrysalis. 

I sat for a long time in my chrysalis gaining strength, reflecting, and transforming. In the chrysalis is where I learned the power of letting go and forgiveness. The person I needed to forgive the most was myself. From there, I found away to learn from all the traumas in my life.

What I learned gave me power to plant more amazing trees and let them flourish. I absorbed lesson after lesson of on perspectives to understand how powerful each and every person is at creating their own gardens, and that what others chose to plant was not my business. All I can ever do for someone is to offer seeds in the way that I know best. I also have to take responsibility if I learn that the seeds I’m passing aren’t healthy.

In my chrysalis I found stillness, presence, and mindfulness to keep me in the mindset of maintaining my garden. I realized that any belief that causes me pain doesn’t HAVE to be in my garden, that is a choice I’m making. I have the power to choose my feelings, thoughts, beliefs/perspectives, actions, and reactions. I will learn from each decision I make and I will allow this choice to set me free­— with that, I became the butterfly. My garden now healthy and well maintained provides me with all that I need to keep me nourished, energized, rested, and able to soar. 

This doesn’t mean I won’t need to go back on a caterpillar’s journey again, because each time I do go back, I learn more. I no longer resent the journey, I embrace it, because I know it leads to breakthrough. I gain more perspective, and I become a better version of myself. I just don’t stay in the caterpillar state as long. I move into my chrysalis absorb my lessons and come out more empowered and colorful each time. 

Why Am I Sharing this Journey with You?

I created a program called, “Becoming the Butterfly” that I’m launching at a Dreamer’s Paradise *Now or Never event in St. Petersburg, FL, Oct. 26, 2019. As I’ve been preparing for this moment, I’m flooded with emotion because this will be my first event since 2002. I started my public speaking career in the Tampa Bay Area and now I’m going back there to re-launch my career with so much more to offer. I’m coming home. I’ve been standing up in front of crowds since I was 14-years old. I went on to earn awards in high school for public speaking, English, and guidance, yet back then never knew that it would lead to a path that I loved being on. My garden is exactly how I want it right now. I’m ready to share the seeds that helped me to create it.

This comes in perfect timing as my first book is coming out on February 18, 2020. Make no mistake; there is a reason the butterfly is on the cover. You can read more about it and *pre-order your copy today. 

If you want to start getting dirty right now, you can go to my *90-Day A Better Me Series

Just remember we are the ones who create our gardens.  We have to provide ourselves with the right food to nurture us to become the butterfly. Watching butterflies soar above us, won’t give us our wings. If we want to live the life of our dreams, we can’t just admire the butterflies around us. We have to do the work it takes to become the butterfly. Only then will we soar.

Thank you for being on this journey with me by reading my work. I started writing this blog in 2016 as way to help me maintain my garden. Focusing on perspectives that keep my energy in a loving place has been such an empowering tool. It keeps my foundation filled with love, which is what encourages all the seeds I want in my garden to grow. I am beyond grateful to each individual who has told me how my seeds have helped her/him. I can’t make anyone plant seeds in their gardens and nobody can make me plant seeds I don’t want in mine, so when I know that a person made the conscious decision to do it, I’m truly honored. 

I hope you will join me in spreading the love on social media. The *Facebook.com/FromALovingPlace page offers lots and lots of daily encouragement from pages who have a like-minded visions of  raising our collective energy. You will find all my social media links at on the main page to the left. I hope you decide to work on your garden so that you can be living the life of your dreams. 

With Love and Gratitude, 

Rachael Wolff 

*Links for more information

Read more about my perspectives on cleaning up our internal gardens here.

3 Ways to Remove the Clutter that Self-Abuse Creates

3 Ways to Remove the Clutter that Self-Abuse Creates

Self-abuse is one of the many ways our self-hate, low self-esteem, lack of worth, and negative self-image manifest themselves. We create clutter both inwardly and outwardly when we don’t become self-aware of how we are treating ourselves. This doesn’t help us lead productive lives. This doesn’t help us stay away from the chaos and drama that surrounds us. The more we hate ourselves and treat ourselves with disrespect, the more chaos and drama we will attract to our lives. The clutter in our minds is fuel for the fear, hate, shame, guilt, and violence that is spreading in and around us.

If we want things to get better around us, we have to start within us. Our energy that we put into the world comes from the energy we are feeding ourselves daily. If we want to stop the abuse, we have to stop creating a space where we are apart of the problem. Self-abuse is not helping us or anyone else! When we self-abuse we are showing others that it’s okay to disrespect us, walk on us, and treat us as if we have no value. Many times people don’t even know that that is the way we feel, because our own behaviors have led them to believe that what they are doing is acceptable.

For years, I wanted to be the victim of my own thinking. I found a sick pleasure in being the doormat, but what I didn’t want to see is that I laid down in front of the person who chose to walk across my back. I was trying to find my value because I hated myself so much that I just gave myself away over and over expecting someone to see what I couldn’t. Our lack of value clutters our minds and distorts our realities into believing that we are trapped and that we can’t stop what is happening to us. Just the thought is self-sabotaging and attracts more of what we don’t want.

When my mind is cluttered, it spreads into my personal spaces. I’ve had my bed so covered in stuff that I have barely been able to fit on it to sleep. That’s when I know I have some real cleaning to do. The last time my bed was like that I dove head-first into figuring out how and why I kept sabotaging myself. It was time for me to look at how I was treating myself.

Here are three ways you can help yourself:

1. Become Aware of the Clutter —INVENTORY NEGATIVE MESSAGES

  • How do you talk to yourself when you are looking in the mirror?
  • What do you think about all your features?
  • What do you think about the person you are?
  • How do you feel about how your life looks to you when you look in the mirror?
  • How do you talk to yourself when you make a mistake for the first time?
  • How do you talk to yourself when you’ve repeated a mistake?

This inventory won’t be done in one sitting. As life situations come up, see how you are talking to yourself:

  • Are you calling yourself names?
  • Are you criticizing yourself?
  • Are you beating yourself with an emotional 2×4?

Just to give you an idea, life situations can still hit me off-guard from time to time and I go back through these steps in order to keep my headspace clean and clutter free.

2. Cleaning out the Clutter—INSIDE AND OUT

  • Start a self-love Journal —Pick a number of days you will commit 35, 45, and/or 90 days. Each day write a minimum of three things you like about yourself. Here’s a hint, if you spot certain positive qualities in others it’s usually because you have them yourself. Do your best not to repeat, especially in the beginning. As you see more and more things you like about yourself, then you can start reusing ones that you are really connecting to.
  • Clean up your physical clutter—Start with a drawer and just keep going. Throw away what you don’t need. Pitch, sell, or donate the things that are just taking up space in your life. Make space for what you want more of in your life. Remember, clear space is peaceful space.

3. Keep the Space Clean—STAY AWARE OF WHERE YOUR MIND GOES

  • Living in gratitude is the best way to keep your space clean. Anytime our minds go to lack, deprivation, fear, hate, blame, etc. we are creating more clutter.
  • Watch your reactions to people. I find this one entertaining. If  a person’s actions work you up: First question your own thinking about what is happening to see if you are fully aware of where your reaction is coming from. Second, I imagine the person saying or doing whatever it is to themselves. Our negative behaviors start from how we are treating ourselves, so we can gain clarity about the situation if we are not taking the person personally. This doesn’t mean we have to accept unacceptable behavior. We just don’t add our own clutter. How someone treats us shows us their love or fear that they are internally dealing with. How we respond to them shows us where we are.
  • Stop the Cycle of abuse. If you see, hear, or feel abusive thoughts about yourself come up, correct them and clean up your self-talk. Treat yourself with love, respect, loyalty, honesty, and compassion. We have to have it inside us before we have a chance of cleaning up what’s around us.
  • Give from a Loving Place. This means you are giving because you want to, not because you think it will make you worthy of someone else’s time, affection, love, respect, etc.

Side effects of these steps are: sleep better, eat healthier, enjoy self-care, kinder thoughts, less judgmental towards others, more compassionate, attract healthier people to our personal and professional lives, more opportunities to do good in the world, appreciate peace, and so many more. 

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff

Did what you just read resonate with you? I hope you will explore FromALovingPlace.com and keep reading. I’ll be bringing a new series to the blog starting September 1, 2019. If you are not following along, make sure to sign-up below.

For my female readers, I have EXCITING news! Letters from A Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World is available for pre-order! Click the link to order your copy today!

The Importance of Friends: The Journey to Becoming Our Best Selves

I woke up this morning with the overwhelming feeling of gratitude. As I wrote out my gratitude list, a stream of joy began to flow through me as I thought about the amazing people in my life. Tears are filling my eyes with how blessed I feel in this very moment. It got me thinking about the importance of friends. When we are on the journey of becoming our best selves, seeing the purpose of people in our lives is essential to our growth.

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This doesn’t always look pretty. I know there have been times on my journey where I look up, hands in the air and say, “Really?” Different people come into my life in the friendship and/or romantic role and show me so much about myself. I get to see where I still have work to do and where I shine.

Now that I’m a woman in my forties, I can tell you how EXTREMELY grateful I am to know that I’ve surrounded myself with friends who see me and know me well enough to know when something doesn’t feel right about the way I’m talking. If you are a woman going into your mid to late forties, you know exactly what I’m talking about. For those of you who don’t—HORMONES is the answer. I had NO IDEA the kind of things that would stir up in me so uncontrollably at this phase of life.

Recently, my hormones created a whirlwind of chaos in my feelings, thoughts, beliefs, and actions toward a particular relationship in my life. I tried all the tools I could wrap my head around to get out of the thought/feeling cycle running through my brain. When I opened up to a select group of friends about it, I really got to see how blessed I am. I didn’t have people jumping on my chaos driven bandwagon. I had friends who eased my fears helping me to question the toxic thoughts running through my mind. I had friends who reminded me of the tools that I share so many times. I had friends who reminded me of the person they knew in me and in the person I was creating the chaos around. I had friends sharing courage, strength, and hope from their own experiences. Five days from the start of hormone-driven hamster wheel going off in my mind, like hitting a stop button, the whirlwind ended—peace restored.

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I’m so incredibly grateful and blessed to know I’ve picked an amazing group of friends who can recognize when I’m engaged in a story in my mind that is not beneficial to me; A group of friends who doesn’t want to sink down into the muck, but who are willing to lend hands to help pull me up out of it.

Some people think that when you go on this journey, you shouldn’t have down periods, days, or seasons, and that’s simply not true. Sometimes there are days where a fearful story in our heads can take over for a brief time and as we learn and grow the power of the story lessens and the time periods it affects us shorten. When we attract the group and/or single friend to our lives who choose not to go down with us, we know we are on the right track to becoming the best versions of ourselves. The energy that we project out comes from deep inside us and it is reflected back to us in the relationships that we attract into our lives.

If we need a lesson in becoming strong, we may attract people who will teach us when and how to say no, and that is enough. If we see our own worth and we are dedicated to the journey of contributing to living as our best selves, we attract a team of people around us who will help us to see our light and encourage us to keep shining it. Whatever friends are brought to your life, be thankful. You have the opportunity to grow from every experience. There are friends who will be there for short periods and ones who will last a lifetime. Each one has their own unique value. Don’t try force any friendships to be something different than what they are. They are serving the purpose they need to serve. Embrace the journey!

This piece is dedicated to my AMAZING friends.  I love you and I’m so grateful for each and every one of you.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

90-Day Series Updates

Dear Readers,

I’m excited to inform you that I’ve been through each day of the FREE  90-Day A Better Me Series and the 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series and now BOTH series are fully available on FromALovingPlace.com. I provided links on each day for easy navigation through every piece of the series. Now that the series is complete, it makes it easier to read like you would a book. Whether you are reading the series again, like some of you have told me you are, or you are new to the 90-Day A Better Me journey, I hope you enjoy it. It was a pleasure to write it and an even greater pleasure to talk with the followers of both series.

Now, I need to go and focus on the editing my book coming out at the end of 2019. If you want to stay in the loop, make sure to subscribe to e-mails. Thank you for all the readers, followers, and commenters. I appreciate each and every one of you!!

Here at the direct links to both series:

90-Day A Better Me Series

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

 

Happy reading!

 

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff ©2019

FromALovingPlace.Com Followers

Dear From A Loving Place followers,

If you are following this blog, I’m sure you’ve noticed and abundance of e-mails coming in and/or Twitter posts. I’m sorry if the posts have been confusing. I’m moving the first part of the 90-A Better Me Letters Series over to FromALovingPlace.com.  I’m backdating all the posts so that they are aligned with the day the letter is companion to. I wanted to make sure readers have full access to both series here on FromALovingPlace.com. I’m also working on adding links to the corresponding installments on each day. This will take a little time, but I’ve noticed an increased amount of views so I want to make the transitions are as easy as possible for those picking up the series now that it is completed.

I apologize for any confusion and the flurry of notifications. There are twenty-six days to transfer. I’m sorry for any inconvenience during the transition. I’m so grateful to everyone following FromALovingPlace.com. I really appreciate your understanding and support.

 

Have a beautiful day!

 

With love and gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: THANK YOU

Letters From A Better Me

Dear Readers,

I want to take a moment to thank all the readers who came on the 90-Day A Better Me Series adventure with me. This series was such a joy to create and write everyday. It was very weird yesterday taking the day off knowing that the series was over. For three months I’ve committed myself to this project. In the beginning, all I knew was my three parts and that I wanted them for an equal number of days. I made a chart for Part I of all the topics I wanted to cover, then day by day wrote whatever came to me. I’m sure some days were full of grammatical errors, because my pure focus was on the message. When I get too into grammar, my head isn’t focused in the right place. As the month would come to the end I would start making the chart for the next month. I would have to rearrange and change some titles, but everything kept flowing together effortlessly. I felt so blessed that there wasn’t a moment of writer’s block.

My life and learning experiences took me on this journey, so it wasn’t me just asking others to do the work, I was doing it. As many times as I’ve done all this work, I find I have to continue to work on me daily. As a single mother of two teenagers I get tested, and if I’m not keeping up with my self-care, I can tell and they can definitely tell. The difference is now, I allow any dark energy I have to teach me right away so that it doesn’t build into toxic energy.

As you may have noticed along with the series being free there were no outside advertisements. I did this because I know sometimes all the outside messages can break the momentum of feelings and physical experiences that occur during the process. I  just know when I’m  into a message than by accident, I click on an  advertisement or read it, I’m taken out of the moment. I wanted to make sure that you could have the best experience possible.

To all the readers who left me comments, liked and/or shared posts that resinated with you, thank you for spreading the love and appreciation. I loved seeing the familiar faces and knowing when a message seemed to really hit. I love watching people grow within themselves, because I know how it feels and how freeing it is. It was such a blessing to have you all on this journey.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful for all my readers and followers.
  2. I’m grateful for the experience of writing the 90-Day series.
  3. I”m grateful to my family and friends who have supported me during this this process.
  4. I’m grateful for all the people who showed up with lessons for me to learn.
  5. I’m so incredibly grateful for having an amazing outlet to reach people across the world who want to unite in love and light.

With Love and Gratitude,

A Better Me

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Here’s a direct link to the 90-Day A Better Me Series Category. Feel free to go back, reread, start from the beginning, or pick and choose along the way. This is your journey now. Just know it’s here for you whenever you want to commit to being A BETTER ME.

https://fromalovingplace.com/category/90-day-a-better-me-series/

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 90 – Committing to Lead by Example

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 90: Committing to Lead by Example

Dear Universe,

Today, I commit to doing my best. I commit to being the change. I commit to leading by example. I commit to doing the work daily to shine my light. I commit to the life of a better me.

I choose perspectives of truth that open me to experiencing love. I choose to perceive my reality through gratitude/abundance. I choose self-care to ensure that I’m giving my best to myself and others. I choose presence to pull me out of my story and give me a path to peace.

I trust the Divine Energy that lives inside of me to lead me to where I’m supposed to be. I trust that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be with every breath that I take. In each moment the Divine gives me opportunity to see someone’s light and/or shine my own. In each moment the Divine gives me opportunity to shine my light or embrace the darkness inside of me in order to learn and grow. I get to choose. I choose to take responsibility for my darkness and turn on my light switch to expose any toxic build-up so that I can clean it up and keep my light on.

My soul’s purpose is to live life from a loving place. My strength comes from the love within me. My perseverance and courage come from being face to face with my own darkness. My empowerment comes from taking responsibility for what energy I CHOOSE to project to the word. My wisdom comes from my openness to learn and grow.  My beauty comes from shining my light.  I will lead by example. I will be the change that the world deserves.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful for the experience of writing the 90-Day A Better Me & A Better Me Letters Series.
  2. I’m grateful for the transformations and abundance that has come from staying committed to gratitude, love, light, and abundance.
  3. I’m grateful for all the people who encouraged me on this journey.
  4. I’m grateful to my amazing kids who allowed me to have space and quiet to write for these 90 days.
  5. I’m grateful to my AMAZING agent for believing in my LETTERS FROM A BETTER ME vision and giving me the opportunity to share my vision with the world by selling my book.
  6. I’m so grateful to Mango Publishing for seeing beyond the social media presence and allowing my vision to come alive.
  7. I’m grateful and honored to have the opportunity to lead by example.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Read Today’s Companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 90 – Leading by Example

This completes the 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series. I hope you have enjoyed the journey. Subscribe to follow FromALovingPlace.com for inspiration, book updates, new adventures, promotions on the 35-Day A Better Me Boot Camp, and so much more. Whatever you CHOOSE to do—I hope you keep choosing to live from a loving place.

 

90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 90 – Leading by Example

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 90: Leading by Example

“A leader is one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way.”

-John Maxwell

When I started this 90-Day A Better Me Series, one of my goals was not just to write about how to clean up our own foundation, re-build, then share our tools with others. It was to do the steps along with my readers. That is why I wrote the 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series to go with it. Before the 90-Day A Better Me Series, I had done a test-run of my 35-Day A Better Me Boot Camp, which I also did along with participants. I don’t just talk about these concepts, like I’ve said before these concepts of self-care aren’t new. What you are seeing in these pages is how I applied them to my life, how I combined them, and how I saw the connections between them. I made what sometimes people us to separate and disconnect each other into connections within me through loving feelings, thoughts, perspectives of truth, actions, reactions, and responses. I don’t believe in do as I say, not as I do thinking.

I don’t expect people to do more than I’m willing to do myself. I don’t expect people to do anything they are not ready to do, or don’t want to do. I know when someone is ready because they don’t talk about wanting to change, they step up and do the work. We have to want peace to the point where we are willing to step out of our own chaos. For some of us, we’ve been marinating in chaos from before we even could understand it. Chaos becomes comfortable. I get it, internal chaos was a comfort zone for me for a long time, I still attach to a little chaos here and there. I just keep taking steps and it becomes less and less. I had to live this in order to show the way for others.

“People may doubt what you say, but they will believe what you do.”

Lewis Cass

Being the change means we lead by example. I told you early on that if you stuck with me through the entire series and did the work things would start transforming in your life. I wrote, read, and did the work of the series for these last 90 days, and I have to report that once again, AMAZING shifts within me and in my external world keep happening. On Day 88, I signed a contract for my first book deal, Letters from A Better Me: The Empowered Woman. On Day 89, my passenger side window of my car broke; I kept a positive attitude about it. When I called to make an appointment to get it fixed, the woman on the phone told me anytime I need anything, please contact her directly because she considered me a pleasure to work with and she loved the energy that I put off. Those are just a couple examples of the kind of things that have been happening.

The energy we put out will come back to us, so if we truly want to stand up as a leaders, we have to be the example. If we expect others to do what we aren’t willing to do ourselves, we often will be led to live in lack. We won’t appreciate what others are doing, because we can’t see how challenging it can be to do what we are asking them to do. When we see people working through challenges, we are more likely to appreciate their efforts if we have been there ourselves. Leading by example keeps us in the energy of gratitude/abundance.

We ALL have the opportunity to learn from the mistakes, trips, slaps in the faces, trauma, drama, chaos, confusion, and losses we experience. How we get up is how we choose to lead others. Do we lead through the path of love or the path of fear? What we choose to do says it all. If we ourselves make a mistake, then we go attacking others by shaming, blaming, and judging to get the heat off ourselves, we are teaching others to do the same. If we make a mistake, take responsibility, and take actions to learn from and find solutions encouraging others to help get creative— The mistake can be avoided next time. We bring light into the darkness and let our mistakes teach us how to become better.

“What you do has far greater impact than what you say.”

-Stephen Covey

How people choose to live, choose to lead, choose to feel, choose to think, choose to believe, and choose to act will be different. The questions we want to be asking ourselves:

  • Are we making life choices from a place of love OR fear?
  • Are we choosing to lead from a place of love OR fear?
  • Are we choosing our feelings based on beliefs of love OR fear?
  • Are our perspectives of truth from a place of love OR fear?
  • Are we choosing to perceive events, conversations, self-reflection from a place of love OR fear?
  • Are we judging others from a place of love OR fear?

The energy we project will come from the love or the fear within us. What we manifest comes from the love or the fear we project. What we attract back to us comes from the love or the fear we manifested in the world. BE CLEAR on what you are putting out there for others to spread and expand upon. Lead by example!

5 Steps to Leading by Example

  1. Be AWARE of the ENERGY you are projecting (Days 2-30)! We all have light (love) and darkness (fear) within us. Be aware of which one you are letting be the dominant energy you are choosing to live by.
  2. Accept responsibility for your choices (Day31-60)! Others cannot make us feel, think, or do anything. You make choices in how you want to perceive what happens and how you interpret people, places, and things. Don’t give your power away by blaming, shaming, judging, and hating. Doing those things puts your energy in your darkness.
  3. Be solution minded (Day 61-90)! Staying in the energy of blame keeps us stuck (lack) in the darkness and blocks our minds from finding creative solutions (abundance). If you are open and willing to learn from the mistakes and missteps, you can make changes and improvements that turn out better than the solutions that come from the energy of fear and lack. Those solutions tend to cause more problems in the future, because lack breeds lack.
  4. Be the change (Day 89)! Represent the energy and the change that you want to see. Do whatever work necessary to keep you projecting light into the world.
  5. TAKE CARE OF YOUR ENERGY!!! SELF-CARE, SELF-CARE, SELF-CARE! Make sure you have an active self-care regimen (Day 73). Do the work to keep yourself in the energy you want to be creating your reality from. This is your life, LEAD IT!

When we are truly ready to take responsibility for our lives, we empower ourselves to BE THE CHANGE—No stories, no blaming, no shaming, and NO EXCUSES! We become the light and can lead ourselves through the darkness. If others choose to see our light, it will help them to see what was hidden in their own darkness. We then can give them tools to help keep their light on—Leading by example.

Thank you for joining me on this 90-Day adventure. I’ve loved all the interactions, comments, and places this journey has led me to. I’m so incredibly grateful for the time you’ve taken to read the words I’ve felt led to write. Three months, around 400 hundred pages, and whole lot of love has filled me with abundance and gratitude for this amazing life I’m choosing to live. Now, I’m in the best place possible to work on the trimming and editing of the Letters from A Better Me: The Empowered Women.

Subscribe to follow FromALovingPlace.com for inspiration, updates, new adventures, promotions on the 35-Day A Better Me Boot Camp, and so much more. Whatever you CHOOSE to do—I hope you keep choosing to live from a loving place.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Read today’s Letter from A Better Me 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 90 – Committing to Lead by Example