Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #212

I’m grateful for EASY shifts in perspective. Sometimes shifting a perspective aligned with the energy of fear, lack, and separation to love, abundance, and peace can happen in an instant. I can see a quote, read a passage, hear someone speak, or just get a moment of clarity from being in the present moment. I love those shifts. The energy shift is often palpable. I love the shifts where I actually laugh out loud because it hits me so fast. It’s like a little soul cleansing.

Today, I commit to enjoying easy perspective shifts. These shifts can happen multiple times throughout the day. I catch myself in a moment of thinking that is aligned with fear, lack, and separation. Then, I consciously re-direct myself to go from a thought that is not healthy for me to one that is. The more conscious I become of the easy shifts, the more open I am for the bigger ones. I’ve started making it more like a game LOL, because why not? We can’t take ourselves too seriously. I find laughter helps me shift faster.

If you are interested on joining me on this journey make sure you are clear on how you see the energy of fear, lack, and separation. You can go back to Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #210 (Link in the title) to help you determine what perspectives are coming from a place of fear, lack, and separation. Try looking at something small, and laughing at the thought while you see a a perspective that is obviously healthier and aligned with love, abundance, and peace. Try to catch yourself in the thoughts throughout the day. Don’t beat yourself up if you notice that you are catching yourself a lot or that you look back later and see you missed some. Use this as an exercise in awareness. It is meant to be fun. Only take on perspectives that are easy shifts.

The beautiful thing about this exercise is that the more often we do it perspective shifts that didn’t even seem possible start shifting. These are the old beliefs that were passed down from generations keeping us in the energy of fear, lack, and separation. Doing this work is like building a muscle. It takes time, work, and persistence, but if we keep up with it, we get the results that we want. Don’t forget to laugh!

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World (click title for more information, formats, and purchasing options)

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #202

I’m grateful for the choice to CHOOSE my story. Today is a special day for me. It’s the year anniversary of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World (Link for more information, purchasing, formats, and previews is in the title) being released in the United States. This was the journey of me figuring out how to re-write my own story through letters. Not all the letters are mine, because I wanted to help women also look at things from a different angle at times. Some of the angles are from friends, family, and strangers who have struggled through stories I didn’t have playing in my head. Once we become conscious of the stories we are telling ourselves, we give ourselves the power to change the story. Some stories are so embedded that they take a lot of work to unravel. It’s like the necklace that gets knotted up—time and patience are essential.

I’ve found that some of my most damaging stories have a multitude of layers. The blessing is learning the tools to spot the story and then the ability to start re-writing a new one. Some take a lot more physical work. Others will be a quick switch in perspective that will start the re-writing process. The beauty of it all is seeing MY CHOICES! Seeing my choices also helps me to see others are making choices in how they are representing their own stories. Anyway someone else judges me is about their story, not mine. Anyway I judge someone else’s is about my story, not theirs. I have the choice not to take someone else’s story personally.

A healthy mind has healthy stories. I can see when my mind is not healthy by the stories I’m weaving, broken records playing in my head, and hamster wheel of thoughts spinning until exhaustion. I can choose at any moment to sit and listen to whatever stories that are playing and I can do the work and re-write the stories that aren’t benefiting me. This is part of the work I have to do to stay aligned with the energy of love, abundance, and peace. I know if my stories are reflecting fear, lack, and separation my body, mind, and soul pay a price. I love having the choice to re-write my story. Facts don’t change, but mindsets, feelings, thoughts, beliefs, actions, and reactions can.

Today, I commit to re-writing the parts of my story that aren’t serving a healthy mindset. Sometimes it’s important for me to put my focus on the stories playing in my head. I know whatever stories I’m telling myself will project out to the world in some shape or form. My stories have changed A LOT over the last twelve years. I think back and it truly reminds me of how far I have come. Some of the stories still make me squirm with discomfort due to the pain they inflicted. Our stories that are aligned with fear, lack, and separation can be devastating to ourselves and the people we love. The revenge stories were some of my darkest places. I did so much damage to myself and my humanity in those stories. Re-writing those stories in a forgiveness mindset changed the trajectory of my life.

Today, I will get out my notebook, sit in silence, and listen:

  • What messages are repeating themselves?
  • What stories am I listening to about myself?
  • What stories do I tell myself when I look in the mirror?
  • What stories am I telling myself about other people?
  • What stories am I hearing in my head when I scroll social media?
  • What stories am I hearing in my head when I watch shows?
  • What stories am I hearing in my head when I watch the news?

The first thing I need to make sure to do after observing is to take responsibility for my stories and be accountable for how they are affecting my energy. If I blame my stories on anybody else, I won’t be able to change them. Blame makes it VERY easy to slip into revenge stories, and I know how ugly those stories get. Blaming myself took me into the stories that made me want to end my life to get revenge on myself. Revenge stories are NEVER healthy no matter who they are aimed at. Revenge is a story that keeps us aligned with fear, lack, and separation. It’s important to pay attention to any stories that make us want to seek revenge on ourselves or others.

The goal for me is to take any stories I have that are aligning me with the energy of fear, lack, and separation and create stories that align with the energy with love, abundance, and peace. No facts of the situations change. The story playing about the facts is what changes, meaning my thoughts, beliefs, actions, and reactions to the facts. My stories don’t change what other people do, they change how I respond to what others do. I’m the heroine of my own story. I’m in charge of making her the person I want her to be. All the materials I need to make her the best version of herself are already within her. I just have to take charge and write her story.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me

Click on the link below to see a preview in Kindle or Audiobook! I hope you will choose to re-write your story with me!

Get your copy today on e-book or audiobook to start re-writing your story right now!

When you get a copy of your copy of the book, send me a message in the comments or on my author page on Facebook (Facebook.com/Lettersfromabetterme) and I will give you a special gift to go with your purchase (For purchases made in February 2021 make sure to include your proof of purchase). If you already read and/or purchased the book and loved it, review it on Amazon and send me the link to the review. You will get a special gift too.

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #199

I’m grateful there is no ONE right way. When I opened myself up to see in perspectives. I discovered my way is not the ONLY way. Some of you might be thinking, well duh. For me, I needed to REALLY look at this one and not just when it was comfortable to do so. I used to beat myself up for not doing things RIGHT. I realized that sometimes what is more important than doing things RIGHT is making sure my energy is aligned with love, abundance, and peace over fear, lack, and separation. When I remind myself there is no ONE right way, I feel at peace. It takes the pressure off and reminds me to focus on what does matter—Aligning with the energy I want to see more of in the world.

Today, I commit to seeing opportunities to grow in my perspectives. Being aligned with love, abundance, and peace helps me live in the faith that no matter how things turn out, If I’m aligned I do what is RIGHT for the moment I am in. Some other people are going to look at things differently than I do. They need to do what is right for them in the moment they are in. That is not my business to judge that. I can get curious to try to understand where someone else is coming from. If I find myself judging someone, I need to ask myself: Where is my energy aligning? Being open gives me opportunities to grow.

When I’m aligning with fear, lack, and separation I don’t ever feel secure that I’m doing what is RIGHT. I live in a constant questioning and I get very wishy-washy. My thoughts can go towards a revenge mentality, which feels AWEFUL! My stomach gets all tied in knots and I often leave the situation wishing I did or said something other than what I did.

When I’m aligning with love, abundance, and peace I have this inner knowing that the decision I’m making is right in this moment. Here’s the thing though, as long as I’m aligned with love, abundance, and peace I can make a variety of different decisions and the the people around me can make decisions and I still stay centered knowing it will all work out and be okay. The situation can be a challenging one and even if I’m working to figure out what to do, I feel calm and peaceful while taking big breaths to gain clarity.

A game I like to play with myself is to find other ways people handle specific challenges. Instead of thinking of people as right and wrong, I will simply see things in the perspective of they are doing what is right for them in this moment. Then I watch how just thinking that thought affects me. I’m happy to say, every time I do it, I feel fully aligned with the energy of love, abundance and peace.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World (Click title for more information, formats, and purchasing options)

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #165

I’m grateful for my consideration of other perspectives. I honestly never knew how much of a gift this was until now. I keep watching people not willing to listen to each other and insist on their own way, which by my definition of love, is not love. So when we are not willing to listen, we are just feeding our own fear of the other. Just another way to feed the energy of fear, lack, and separation. We can do this in our relationships and our judgments of whoever we determine the OTHER is. If we think we are better or less than that OTHER, we disempower ourselves.

I choose to live in the energy of love, abundance, and peace as much as possible. That is where my perspectives of belief come from. I’ve read, heard, and listened to countless people express their perspectives from a place of fear, lack, and separation and love, abundance, and peace. The one thing that can feed both energy groups is feeling HEARD and understood. This DOES NOT mean we will agree. Once I’ve listened to someone, I get the opportunity to ask questions and insight critical thinking. I get the opportunity to share my perspectives. If they choose to attack me for my perspectives, I have the opportunity to call on my healthy boundaries. Healthy boundaries and considering other perspectives go hand in hand for me.

By considering other people’s perspectives, I will look at where they are getting their information. Is it media (perspectives, agenda, facts), courts (facts), public records (facts), conspiracy theorists (perspectives), politicians (perspectives & agenda), direct source (perspective), gossip (misinformation-just imagine the childhood game telephone), religious beliefs (personal perspective that differs from person to person even in the same organizations/groups), science (facts in the moment, agenda, and ever-changing with new information), etc.? I have to use critical thinking. I have to stay current with new science, because the field moves fast. This is why in school we weren’t allowed to use any research that was beyond five years old. I also learned that in some research, results can be skewed due to agenda and method. If we are aligned with fear, lack, and separation, our beliefs are often pigeon-holed to specific sources. I have to remember there is always a human and a human’s perspective coming from a place of love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation behind any information being spread, bought into, and absorbed. In order for me to stay aligned, I HAVE to listen to the information that I’m taking in.

Aligning with love, abundance, and peace allows me to keep my mind open, but it is not a veil of la la and everything is beautiful all the time. Aligning with love, abundance, and peace means keeping a clear head by making sure my energy field can’t be manipulated by people spewing hate agenda, fear agenda, divide agenda, and victim agenda. These agendas keep me prisoner. I want to make sure I remain free from the evil people in this world who use innocent people to do their bidding. There are plenty of social science experiments that show how good people will do bad things. Staying aligned with love, abundance, and peace keeps me protected from going along with agendas that expand the energy of fear, lack, and separation in the world. This is why I have to consider individual’s perspectives carefully.

Side note: Please, don’t misunderstand me, I’m not talking about someone who is unleashing their energy out on me as a form of abuse or harassment. Healthy boundaries are important to be able to know when my listening will benefit the greater good. I will be talking about healthy boundaries on day #166.

Today, I commit to considering other people’s perspectives. Here is some of the things I ask myself when I’m considering other people’s perspectives:

  • Is the person speaking wanting me to align with love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation?
  • Does the person speaking have an agenda to have power over the way I think?
  • How is my body reacting to what I’m hearing?
  • How many people or institutions do I have to believe or not to believe to go along with their perspective?
  • Is the person I’m listening to take accountability and responsibility for what is theirs or do they shift blame?
  • Does the person want me to put them on a pedestal (RED FLAG)?
  • Do they have public record, court, or scientific proof to go along with their perspective (shown, not spoken)?
  • Is this person engaging in gossip to spread their information?
  • Am I feeling aligned with love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation while engaging with this person? WHY?
  • What are other perspectives within their group saying (the one’s that don’t agree)?
  • Does the person have compassion, empathy, and forgiveness or do they push victim mentality, revenge, and us against them mindsets?
  • Is the person open or close-minded?
  • Is the person willing to listen and/or consider other perspectives of thought?
  • Does this person want me to hate a group of people? How does me hating the group of people give them power and create me to feel separate, divided, or victimized?
  • Is the person wanting me to focus on problems (fear, lack, and/or separation) or solutions (abundance- considering choices and options)?

If you are going to do this for yourself, make sure you have your definitions of fear, lack, and separation and love, abundance, and peace in front of you, but if your perspective of these definitions is skewed, so will how you perceive anything you hear. It’s important to be in a peaceful place and see how your body reacts to the definitions. If you’ve been following along on this journey, I’ve already given you tools to do this.

These questions may seem like a lot in the beginning, but they all become very natural. I use these practices every day. Considering perspectives keeps my critical thinking mind working. Some of the places beyond my personal relationships, I started realizing doing this was so important in considering politics, media, and religion. The group itself isn’t bad or good. The people within the group can be aligned with love, abundance, and peace or fear, lack, and separation. Knowing the difference is essential for me to know if I align with a person’s energy or not. A person who is aligned with fear, lack, and separation to the point of a psychosis like Narcissistic Personality Disorder or Antisocial Personality disorder—that person can use any venue to manipulate, abuse, and harass people because their personal agenda of power and control.

Example: If I believe that all media, politicians, or religion is bad, I’m living in the energy of fear, lack, and separation, because I refuse to see the humanity in the people within the group/field. I just need to use my critical thinking. I know that I’m looking for specific characteristics, which is one of the many reasons that I like studying people, because I don’t want to give my power away like I have before. In religion, I would see how some of the leaders would use shame tactics (fear, lack, and separation) and others would use love and compassion (love, abundance, and peace) to get their congregation to follow them. They could be from the same overall group, but the person leading took different approaches to how they interpreted and preached.

Years ago in the US, political parties and power grabs for position within a party became so based in fear, lack, and separation that I had a very hard time understanding where candidates actually stood. I didn’t understand how they could say such hateful things, then say, okay now let’s come together. To me, that is like my best friend telling me that she is being abused by her partner, then making up and telling me that I can trust him again…REALLY?! This is how adults leading our country are behaving. There are a lot of people behind a campaign, it is not just the candidate. So, I learned to dig deeper. I know the other side has an agenda for me not to like the other candidate, so I’m not going to go to them to determine what I believe about them. I dig into public records, court records, and voting history. I look for words that came out of their own mouths, and what people who have worked, lived, or been in close contact with them say about them. What I found is that individuals on both sides lie and/or choose perspectives of fear, lack, and separation. If a campaign is trying to get me to HATE a person, group, or side…I have to look at the agenda behind why they want me to hate them. My experiences of being abused by a narcissist and studying the disorder is that it has made me believe in actions over words for trust, and when words are used to hate, demean, belittle, abuse, hurt, incite violence, separate, or create victimization, I know that person is wanting me to align with fear, lack, and separation over me to gain control over may thoughts and actions. Many campaigns on both sides have used fear-based tactics.

Side note: For full transparency, I’m an independent voter who votes for the person I feel is most willing to work with the other party, because I believe in “United we stand, divided we fall.” These are my perspectives based on how I choose to live my life. When I sided with a particular party, I noticed that I narrowed my view on what I was willing to look at and hear. I felt like I got swayed too easy when I did that. So for me, it was right for me to take the stance that I did. I actually enjoy researching both sides. This election more than usual. Because of the political climate, there were tons of different very interesting perspectives out there. There were more people looking for more bipartisan politics (i.e. country over party perspectives). For someone who studies people and how their minds work, it was very eye-opening for me to see how people got to where they did. Some of the testimonials from these groups came from thoughtful critical thinking based on a unity perspective. Some came from fear/revenge mindsets, which is a given in today’s climate. Some were people really struggling to prioritize character vs. policy. Many people in these groups fell into this grey area of perspectives that I hadn’t heard much of especially since politics had become so polarized.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2021

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #75

I’m grateful my perspective is my choice. I used to give my power away by when I would forget that I had the power to interpret a situation whatever way I wanted to. I feel, think, believe, and act according to the perspectives I’m buying into. If I want to live from a loving place and align my energy with love, abundance, and peace, I choose perspectives to keep me in that place. When I fall short, I question the story that is playing in my mind. The beautiful thing is I can change the story I’m telling myself at any point. When I focus on the fact that my perspective is my choice, I feel empowered to change what isn’t working and celebrate what is. I get sent helpers who show me how to do it better, and I keep growing. I absolutely love the power of perspective!

Today, I choose perspectives that align with life I want. If you don’t like where your mind is taking you, write a new story. I love doing this. I actually write out the story I want to be working through my mind instead of the one that is causing me stress, pain, or anxiety. I’m a mom of two teens. You better believe I can get myself caught up in stories that don’t align with love, abundance, and peace sometimes. I can catch myself sometimes right before, during, or after a story starts playing in my head. Then I remember, my perspective is my choice. I can keep telling myself a story that is painful and aligns me with fear, lack, and separation, or I can CHOOSE differently. Sometimes I need to really work at finding a healthier perspective, and other times just reminding myself that I’m creating the story is enough to shift my thinking. What once may have caused me months or years or painful thoughts is now minutes, hours, or days. When we take our power back, we re-write our story.

With Love, Abundance, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2020

Author of Letters from a Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Woman Transforms the World

Find out about The Power of One Virtual Conference: You Create Reality Conference I will be speaking at on Oct 23-24, 2020. Use the promo code #UCreateReality/Rachael and get a 10% discount, and if you use that code and let me know you are coming, I will have a special gift for you after the conference. Go to: https://www.icreateleadership.org for details.

Daily Aligning with Love, Abundance, and Peace #19

In order to align ourselves with love, abundance, and peace we have to stop taking what other people say and do personally. If their energy is aligned with fear, lack, and separation, that is what they will project onto whoever will listen and/or align with their energy. My mom has been telling me, “It’s none of your business what other people think of you” since I was thirteen years old. What people think of us and others is based on what beliefs (perspectives of truth) they are attaching to within themselves and the SAME is true for us. We have choices in how we respond to others through acquiring new ways to look at things and that is something to be VERY grateful for.

I have a choice to internalize what someone says, or I can be grateful that I can come up with other ways to look at it that trigger my compassion. The things I choose don’t have to be true for someone else, I’m only responsible and accountable for how my thoughts make me feel and what energy I project out. If it helps me feel better by not taking it personally and seeing other possibilities that help me to align me with love, abundance, and peace—I’m okay with that. I’m grateful for my choice Not to take others personally by seeing seeing these options in perspectives instead:

  • Others are only every projecting what is inside them.
  • Someone who says hurtful things to others is really saying those things to themselves (They are their own mirror).
  • Some people who are supporting abusive people or are abusive see abuse as normal, so they don’t even see what they or another person are doing doing as abusive. Possibly because they have been abusing themselves on an unconscious level or they have suppressed verbal, mental, emotional or physical abuse from someone else it’s not my job to CHANGE them, just be aware that I don’t have to align or agree with any energy I don’t want to be apart of and make the healthiest choice for me and my energy.

Today’s challenge is one I love doing as I scroll social media looking at posts and comments. I choose to see what anyone is saying and doing as a projection of what is going on inside of them.I love figuring out if a person is coming from a place of love, abundance, and peace OR fear, lack, and separation. Focusing my energy on seeing through this lens also helps me to look at what I’m saying and doing more clearly.

If someone in my family or any of my other relationships interacts with me in any other way than loving, respectful, and considerate, I take my ego out of it (making how they are acting about me), and try to ask questions that help me to see what is going on inside of them. I find questions are so much more productive than any statements I make, not saying I don’t do it sometimes (LOL). I find that making statements doesn’t tend to get me to the heart of the issue, and it also doesn’t help the person I care about figure out why they are projecting their energy of fear, lack, and separation onto me. I really hope you will try today’s challenge and see what a difference it makes in your energy. I get a natural high when I do it, which is how I know my energy is aligned with love, abundance, and peace.

With Love, Gratitude, and Peace,

©Rachael Wolff 2020

Find out more about Letters from A Better Me here:

Available in audiobook, cd, ebook, and paperback

#PerspectiveChallenge: I Can’t Stand When People Use the Word…

PERSPECTIVE: I CAN’T STAND WHEN PEOPLE USE THE WORD…

Our attachment to words can create a lot of conflict in our lives, and often times when other people use the words that we HATE they aren’t using them in the same way as we are interpreting them. I’m amazed at the amount of verbal attacks that happen over the use of words, and it gets even more complicated when we think about some of the words that people hate, empower others. This can make communication quite the challenge. 

What words get under your skin?

What words have a negative impact on you but a positive impact on someone else? 

If a word has a negative impact on the way you feel, what you think, how you act, and or react towards others, you are giving the word power over you. Do you really want a word that someone else uses to create stress in your world? The words others use reflect their reality. Knowing our own trigger words can help us to not give them power over us. When we hold ourselves accountable and responsible for the energy we exude, we start changing how we let things get to us.

There are ways we can communicate with others without creating a war with words. If we tell people how a word makes us feel, they may explain to us how they actually meant it. We can also simply ask them, “Why did you chose to use that word?” When we approach a situation with curiosity instead of judgment, we diffuse the situation and the power it has over us. If you don’t like their perspective of truth, you don’t have to live by it, but creating more negativity around a word, will affect YOUR energy, so be conscious of what you want to put out into the world. You have to ask yourself— Is another person’s use of words worth you losing your peace?

TODAY’S PERSPECTIVE CHALLENGE

Take a word you have a negative attachment to and come up with three different thoughts about the word that take away the power it has over you. You will be amazed at how well this works the next time the word comes up in conversation.

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Great News!

Letters from A Better Me: How Becoming an Empowered Transforms the World is now available on Audiobook (click for link).

90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 84 -Keeping the Toxic Energy Out of Our Internal Homes

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 84: Keeping the Toxic Energy Out of Our Internal Homes

“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.”

-Anais Nin

Once we bring awareness to our darkness and take responsibility for it, we can shine light on any toxic energy hidden within the walls of our internal homes. On Day 83, I gave “6 Steps to Transforming the Darkness within Our Internal Homes”.    Darkness will show up, because we all have dark corners and shadows there to teach us on our journeys. We learn so much from the darkness within us. Yesterday, I talked about cleaning up the toxic energy and build-up that the darkness exposes when we decide to turn our lights on in the dark rooms. Today, we are expanding on that concept to focus on how to keep the toxic energy out of Internal homes. This isn’t a boot camp, 90-day, 6-month, and/or yearlong submersion program. There is no short-term fix for a lifelong learning process.

10 Steps to Keeping Toxic Energy Out of Your Internal Home

  1. STAY PRESENT! The toxic seed can only be planted, grow, and spread if you get stuck in your dark stories of the past and a fear-filled unknown future. When you get out of your fear-based stories, you don’t germinate the seed. You can stop it at the source when it gets handed to you.
  2. Stay AWARE! If you spot darkness within yourself, work through it. Do NOT run away or numb (addiction) it. Those methods turn darkness into toxic energy. Instead of learning and expanding, you avoid and shrink. If you are blaming, shaming, or judging someone else for your darkness—You still have work to do! That toxic energy will spread if you don’t shine light on it.
  3. CHECK-IN WITH YOUR PERSPECTIVES OF TRUTH. Make sure they are aligned with the light within you. A great intention is to shine your light on any darkness inside of you.
  4. KEEP DOING THE WORK! Your self-care regimen (Day 73) is an essential piece for ensuring that you don’t allow toxic energy into your internal home to fester, grow, and spread.
  5. KEEP YOUR LIGHT ON! Like mold, toxic energy grows in the dark hidden walls within your home. Keeping your light on means you are using the tools and techniques you’ve learned along the way to spot sources where there are leaks that can cause a build-up. Make sure you know which tools to use to help you keep your light on (i.e. prayer, tapping, meditation, worship, yoga, dance, writing, swimming, nature exploration, etc.). Only you can know which tools work best for you to help you keep your light on at all times. You have to truly connect and align with your actions or your light dims.
  6. SHINE BRIGHT! Keep your light in the energy of gratitude. Gratitude’s light energy is vast and expansive. It is the light of abundance. When you operate from a place of gratitude, you are running on a full tank. Your light will guide you and keep you focused on the best you have to offer the world.
  7. LIVE FROM A LOVING PLACE. When you live your life from a loving place both internally and externally your darkness will stay your teacher, but it won’t grow into toxic energy. Your love will simply dry out the toxic seed so that it’s purified.
  8. DO YOUR BEST! You are here to learn. You will be the teacher and/or the student many times over in this life. You will be given some lessons that were inspired by the light and others that have to be learned through your darkness. If you learn the lesson, you don’t have to repeat it. If there are deeper lessons to hit, just keep going and doing your best. The blessings that come from learning are beautiful. No one is meant to do this life perfectly. You need to stop expecting it from others and yourself. If you do the best you can WITHOUT excuses or copouts: your life will be better; your contributions to your family, friend, and community will be better; and the world will be better. A Better you equals a better world to live in.
  9. REPEAT! If you want to keep the toxic energy out of your internal home you will have to repeat these steps over and over. It won’t come out the same way every time, so don’t expect a specific result. Just know when you take care of yourself and stay present, you have the ability to do the best you can in every moment. Trust your journey!
  10. MAKE SPACE FOR CHANGE, GROWTH, AND EXPANSION! When you are on the journey of A BETTER ME, you will change, grow, and expand. Some people will fall off your path and others will come onto to it. Don’t try to hold onto anyone or anything that is not meant to go with you on this path because that can create toxic energy when you are holding on too tight to what you’ve outgrown. Trust your path! Don’t try to force people to walk through doors that they aren’t ready for. They might not be meant to come with you. If they are tied into their own darkness and/or toxic energy and you don’t give them a toxic hand to hold onto, their energy won’t match yours anymore. They become that flip side of the magnet. That goes the same way for jobs and lifestyles. Make the space for your new inner world to show through so that toxic energy has no space to grab onto.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Today’s Letter from A Better Me: 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 84 – Keeping the Toxic Energy Out of My Internal Home

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 83 – Taking Responsibility for Inviting the Dark Energy into My Internal Home

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 83: Taking Responsibility for Inviting the Dark Energy into My Internal Home

Dear Self,

I’m the only one who can invite dark energy into my internal home. I trust that if I attach to a person’s darkness in the physical world and invite that darkness to stir inside of me, I’ve invited the darkness in. I’m responsible for anything the darkness does inside of my internal home. If I’m attaching to the darkness, there is a reason for it. I have something to learn from it. I have a piece of me to heal if I’ve invited darkness in to teach me what I need to learn. I am resisting learning, which is why the darkness came to my door.

I have options when I see that I’ve invited the darkness into my home. The darkness stimulates fear, judgment, guilt, shame, hate, vengeance, greed, and/or ego—Just to name a few. I can see options in my thinking that will stimulate love, compassion, empathy, peace, joy, connection, and hope. I can find reasons to look at the situation from different perspectives to see that the only thing that is trapping me in my darkness are my thoughts. I am choosing my thoughts, so I have the key to get out of the darkness when I’m ready.

I can turn on the light. My first step towards turning on the light is prayer. I pray for the courage to face myself in my darkness. I know that the person, thing, or event in my physical world only triggered me to see my darkness. Now by choosing to shine the light on it, I’m willing to look deeper to see what my dark corner has hidden. For that, I need courage. Once I pray, I like giving myself space to mediate. When I’m quiet and my breath is steady, I hear the Divine whisper to me. If I don’t hear the answer consciously yet, my next step is to go out in nature and focus on what I see, hear, smell, touch, and/or taste. This opens my senses up to receiving answers. Most times nature offers me some insight. I go and stretch through my thoughts and center myself with the Earth through the practice of yoga. I don’t usually have to go any further, but sometimes if the dark energy is just lodged down deep, I shake it out and dance. My light switch clicks on.

This is where I can spot any toxic waste and build-up that is hidden in the dark. These are my old perspectives of truth that I may have thought I got rid of but they are still lingering and spreading like mold. These are those old beliefs that say things like, People have to like me so that I have value, I’m small, I’m unlovable, I’m a victim, I’m more important than another person, I’m less important than another person, I’m nothing, I’m entitled to more, I don’t deserve more, etc. I have to look at my toxic energy that is causing toxic patterns in my life. Those toxic patterns are what I attach to in other people’s darkness. If I’m being triggered by darkness, I’m in a great space to see the secrets that are being hidden in those dark corners.

Now, I can clean it out. My self-care regimen can help me to work through these old beliefs that I’m attaching to. I don’t have space for them anymore. It’s time to replace them with perspectives of truth that make my internal home warm, cozy, safe, comfortable, beautiful, loving, and inspiring. I pray for assistance to help me transform any toxic energy into light producing energy so that I’m able to project more love out into the world. The more clarity I get, the better the job I do at cleaning up the mess. I’m responsible for the upkeep, maintenance, growth, development, and expansion of my internal home.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m so grateful for the dark energy that I invited in because it showed me what areas of my internal home that still need work.
  2. I’m grateful that I’m empowered to make the changes I need to in order to shine my light.
  3. I’m grateful to God for helping me find my courage and strength to face my darkness and take responsibility for it.
  4. I’m grateful to the people who trigger my darkness because they help me to become a better version of me.
  5. I’m grateful for all the unlimited choices I have on perspectives. I love that I ALWAYS have options of how I want to look at things.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 83 – Taking Responsibility for Inviting Dark Energy into Our Internal Homes

 

90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 76 – Using Perspective Tools to Navigate Our Relationships

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 76: Using Perspective Tools to Navigate Our Relationships

“Each time you are tempted to become angry, or jealous, or fearful and you challenge that feeling, you empower yourself.”

-Gary Zukav

In Part II, I covered the topic of perspective (Days 42-46). We can’t use the tools of perspective until we understand how our perspectives of truth affect our lives. Until we understand about perspectives we want to see us as right and them as wrong. This view is a dark path that leads to fear, anger, hate, resentment, jealousy, revenge, envy, and codependency. We ALL know the effects of these things on our relationships.

Using perspective tools to navigate our relationships opens us up to hear what our family members, romantic partners, friends, coworkers, bosses, clients, and others are saying and where they are coming from. The more we can use our perspective tools the healthier we will be in our relationships, because as we ALL know NOBODY is going to agree with the when, where, how and why of everything we do, say, and feel. Just like, we won’t ALWAYS agree with someone else’s choices.

Using perspective tools is away to reduce the stress of not seeing things from the same angle, because really, that is all it is. We will never have the same exact view of life as any other person. We ALL have the journey each of us are meant to have, no two will ever be exactly the same. If we plan on taking any kind of relationship path with a person, the best we can do is be open to try to understand. It doesn’t mean we have to agree or change our ways, but by understanding our perspectives of truth, then making the effort to understand theirs—There is peace. Communication will improve, but we will talk about that a little later in the series. For now, we will focus on how to use perspective tools to navigate our relationships.

5 Ways You Can Use Perspective Tools

  1. We are either interpreting the moment from a place of love (light) or fear (darkness). The first step is to look at what you and the person you’re communicating with are projecting, love or fear. If either party is projecting fear, question where the fear is coming from inside.
  2. We ALL have a story we are telling. No matter what happens there are lots of ways to write our stories. When we don’t like the way we feel, think, and/or act we can choose a different way. We give the power to our stories. We decide if our story is going to be led by love or fear. How do we want our character to treat the secondary character in front of us?
  3. Try to see from the perspective of the other person. This means you have to ask a lot of questions to figure it out. Don’t tell the person how they should feel, think, or act. Ask questions to uncover why they are feeling, thinking, and/or acting the way they are. If you take the time to understand where they are coming from it’s easier for them to hear you when you explain where you are coming from.
  4. Speak in terms of perspective. You need an understanding of your perspective of truth that works in your life. Their perspective of truth might work in their life. You can ask: Does thinking the way you do bring joy and peace to your life? If it doesn’t, and your perspective of truth does bring joy and peace to your life, you are now open to explain without telling them they HAVE to change. The choice is theirs. It all depends on the perspectives we choose to believe. If your perspective doesn’t bring you peace and joy, maybe the other person may have perspectives you may want to implement in your life.
  5. KEEP QUESTIONING YOUR THOUGHTS!!! Please, if you find yourself blaming, shaming, and judging others or yourself— Go back to Part I (Days 1-30) of the 90-Day A Better Me Seriesand work through what is keeping you from having healthy relationships with others. The more we question our thinking, the better we will be.

If we use these tools, we start getting real honest with ourselves about the people we are inviting into our lives. We start noticing the energy they are bringing with them and how we feel when we are around them. If they are large sources of darkness, the more we spot it, the more we can protect ourselves from it. We will get more into that later. Like we talked about yesterday, we first have to stay present with the person standing in front of us. Once we are present, we see perspectives of truth clearly.

Once we see that we are all just interpreting life through our own unique perspective, we stop taking it so personally when people don’t agree with ours. We can question our perspectives of truth without feeling violated. It becomes much easier to say, we just see things from a different perspective and that’s okay. This is why mine works for me… If yours works for you and brings you peace and joy believing what you do—GREAT!

After we learn to navigate our relationships through the use of perspective tools, it makes it much easier to see which relationships work and which ones don’t in our lives. The more peaceful we remain in someone else’s chaos, the more the energy shifts and changes. The other person will either find a place of calm with you, or they may start unconsciously trying to stir up more chaos to break the relationship. Either way, you will be blessed the calmer and more peaceful you stay. The Law of Attraction will work in your favor.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 76