90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 81 – Protecting Our Internal Homes from Vandals

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 81: Protecting Our Internal Homes from Vandals

“Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoner.”

-Lao Tzu

Protecting our internal homes from vandals is an essential piece to us becoming the best versions of ourselves. We can’t protect our inner homes without the awareness of why we invited individuals into our homes in the first place. A person can’t come into our internal homes unless he/she is invited. Our thoughts about people give them entry into our homes. How we choose to view them in our homes determines if they will be pleasant guests, teachers, students, entertainers, and/or vandals. We also determine what these individuals leave behind. Did they give us seeds for our garden? Did they give us art for our walls? Did they give us helpful tools to help maintain our homes and gardens? Did they rip of flowers? Did they give us seeds for strangling weeds? Did they mark our homes with graffiti? We become prisoners of the vandals by allowing fear-filled feelings, thoughts, and perspectives of truth of who we interpret them to be, how we perceive their actions, and/or what we perceive that they think into our internal worlds.

They become vandals when we make ourselves their victim in our internal home. We allow them to destroy our homes and turn them into dilapidated shacks by allowing them to have power over our internal space and peace. We give them power by choosing perspectives of fear. The more power we give them, the more destruction we allow them to do. Now, this is not the person in the physical world causing this damage, it’s how we interpret them in our internal world. We can create kind people to be vandals, just as easily as we can turn a sociopath into a vandal. It’s all in how we choose to interpret their words and behavior inside our own heads that creates our internal view of them.

Even I have been a vandal in others internal homes, but remember I have nothing to do with that. If someone doesn’t like my perspective, they can create me to be a vandal. If someone takes something I said as mean or cruel, which could have been me having healthy boundaries, it doesn’t matter, a person can still make me a vandal in his/her head. We see how people do this all the time on social media when they attack other people. In order to attack someone else, the attacker first made the other person a vandal in their own internal world. This other person may be helping millions of people in the world, but if they have a perspective that is different from an unconscious person’s (attacker) perspective and that person decides to ignore the good and embrace the fear of the differences, the image the attacker created in his/her dilapidated shack makes the other good natured person a vandal.

We need to know and understand that no other person can be a vandal in our internal homes without our permission. Narcissists can be very good at charming their way into people’s internal homes, but they still have to be invited in. Not every person who crosses paths with narcissists invites them in. How we protect ourselves from vandals works the same way if we are dealing with narcissists and/or good Samaritans that we choose to view through eyes of fear, because protecting ourselves has NOTHING to do with what these people do in the physical world or who they are in the physical world. Protecting our internal homes has EVERYTHING to do with us taking responsibility for our own perspectives of truth.

Here’s the best part about this process, when we protect our internal homes from narcissists, they have less chance of affecting our lives in the physical world. Narcissists need to be invited into our internal homes to have the power they desire over us in the physical world. Once we stop inviting them in, they lose interest, because if they can’t affect our nature in the physical world, they get bored and go on the hunt for another victim. It may be awhile before they stop attempting to get in. Eventually if we stay consistent, and we FULLY close and lock our door to them, they stop trying. They may even stay in our physical lives in some way (i.e. family members), but we don’t allow them space to vandalize our internal homes. We can choose to them even without inviting them in. To love someone means we are spreading our light to her/him. A person can stay in their darkness without affecting our light.

When we learn how to protect our internal home from vandals, we also will start to see AMAZING shifts and changes in who is attracted into and/or repelled from our physical worlds. I love watching how this process unfolds. I’ve found it fascinating that the healthier I get, the people who are stuck in their darkness have less and less interest in me or they will make me a vandal to their dilapidated shacks. If they choose to make me a vandal, they will attempt to have an altercation with me, and if I don’t allow them into my internal home to vandalize it, I will not respond like they want me too, so they will distance themselves from me. I take this as an ABSOLUTE BLESSING! I trust a person who is stuck in their darkness is on their own journey. If I’m meant to give them a seed from my garden, I do. It’s up to them what they choose to do with it. They may have so many weeds destroying their internal gardens that even if they try to plant my seed it won’t have space to grow. They first have to clean up the weeds before they can see the beauty that lies under them. If deep down a person wants a path out of their own darkness, I imagine them walking just outside of my internal property waiting to know when they are ready.

If we protect our internal homes, it doesn’t matter what others do in their own darkness, we won’t let them destroy our internal homes and the gardens we’ve created around them. Once we realize we can shut our doors to the uninvited and say goodbye to those visitors we invited in who turned into vandals, we are truly empowered to be the BEST versions of ourselves. Our awareness and dedication to do the work to keep us in our light opens us up to lives beyond what we could have ever imagined. When we protect our internal homes, we allow our beacon of light to shine brighter. Our homes stay filled with the love and light that spreads out into the world.

 

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Over the next few days you will get the tools to keep your internal homes protected. Just like everything else in this 90-Day A Better Me Series, these are seeds. You have to decide if you want to plant them. You have to make sure your land is ready. If you struggle with making these seeds grow into strong beautiful additions to your garden, go back to Part I of the series and work it from the beginning. Whatever you do, remember you have the power to change the trajectory of your life by how you choose take care of your internal world. We project out what we create inside. That manifests the reality we live in and attracts back to us what we’ve projected out. We have to make sure we are projecting out the best inner life we can to create an outer life we love and appreciate.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Check-out today’s Letter from A Better Me: 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 81 – Protecting My Internal Home from Vandals

 

90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 79 – Healthy Communication Tools

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 79: Healthy Communication Tools

Before I ask you to sit with me,

I must be able to sit with myself.

Before I ask you to accept my pain,

I have to accept the pain myself.

Before I ask you to love me,

I have to be MADLY in love with myself.

-C.Thoth

In order to keep our internal homes clean for visitors (Day 74), healthy communication is key. We learn so much about ourselves by how we communicate with others. Our communication skills show us if we are in-line with our intentions of love and light, or if we are connected to our own darkness. If we are coming from a place of darkness (fear, blame, shame, hate, vengeance, ignorance, prejudice, AGAINST, name-calling, yelling, etc.), we are incapable of having healthy communication with others. We will bring toxic energy into the communication. Our intentions will be aligned with fear (darkness) instead of love (light). Having healthy communication with others is about us staying in our light and sharing it with others. We have the choice to bring light or submit to darkness.

When the person we are communicating with brings their light, and we bring our light, even in the disagreements there will be light. Both parties can connect even with differing perspectives of truth. The connection is through love, peace, and joy. When we stand for love and light, we are attracted to people who also stand for the spreading of love and light. Communication becomes so much more interesting when people start enjoying learning about different perspectives of truth, instead of condemning them. We can do this in our intimate relationships as much as we do it with individuals from across the world who are strangers to us. Our openness to gain understanding of where others are coming from spreads light in our homes and in the world around us.

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.”

-Tony Robbins

10 Healthy Communication Tools

  1. Be aware of where your energy is. Are you communicating from a loving place or a fear-filled one? It can’t be both. If your thoughts are confused, slow down and sit in your awareness before you speak.
  2. Speak from a loving place. If you want the best communication, make sure you are speaking in terms of solutions (love/light), not problems (fear/darkness). With fear we get stuck in our own darkness and others are more likely to engage in theirs if that is where we are.
  3. Know your intentions. Be clear of what your intentions are with the person your communicating with. If you’re not clear, they won’t receive you clearly.
  4. Express your feelings. Speak in terms of I feel ____________ when you did _______________ or do ________________. This communicates your feelings without BLAMING and or making someone responsible for your feelings positive and/or negative. Another person isn’t responsible for making you feel anything, but that doesn’t mean that it’s not healthy to let them know that particular actions and/or words bring up specific feelings in you. Unless the person is unhealthy and sick, most likely they didn’t intentionally mean to cause you pain. Only when we are in our own darkness do we intentionally cause other people pain and suffering (we will be discussing that in the days to come).
  5. Listen from a loving place. When we listen from a loving place, we are adding our light to the exchange. This doesn’t mean the other person won’t stay in their darkness if that is where they are, but we don’t add to it. When we add to the darkness, we put ourselves into the darkness. Our light is dimmed and we no longer see clearly.
  6. Speak in perspectives of truth. Each individual has his or her own perspectives of truth (Days 42-46). When we can communicate clearly from this place, we don’t have the expectations of others being exactly where we are and to understanding our point of view. We don’t communicate in terms of I’m right and you’re wrong. Instead, we say this is where I’m coming from
  7. Listen in terms of perspectives of truth. The goal is to understand where the other person is coming from. Remember they are writing their own story. Listen for what their story about themselves is saying. Is what they are saying coming from perspectives of love or fear? How are those perspectives making them feel? How are their perspectives effecting communication with you?
  8. Take a break when needed. If communications gets challenging, take a minute to re-center yourself if needed. Go to the bathroom and take some deep breaths, align with your light and intentions, and pray for the words to help you communicate clearly.
  9. Agree to disagree when needed. Remember you are each speaking and listening from your own perspectives of truth. You can simply let the other person know if their perspectives are bringing peace to his or her life, you are happy for him/her. If you are aligned with your own energy and intentions, your perspectives are bringing you a sense of calm no matter where the other person is.
  10. End communications on a note of gratitude. It doesn’t matter how the communication went—You learned something! You may have learned beautiful things about a person where light connected to light, even if some of the perspectives were different. You may have learned where you still have work to do on your own dark corners, which awareness is a thing to definitely be grateful for. You may have learned about perspectives of truth led by fear that you can be grateful that you don’t believe because you see the negative effects they have on a person’s thinking. There is ALWAYS a place for gratitude.

Remember to enjoy the journey! We aren’t going to do this perfectly. We are all learning to be the best we can. We can only do this journey one step at a time.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff  ©2019

Need more inspiration? Read 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 79 – Committing to Healthy Communication

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 73 – Constructing My Self-Care Regimen

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 73: Constructing My Self-Care Regimen

Dear Self,

I’m taking the time to construct my self-care regimen by going through what I use to help me in different areas of my life. Once I’ve done this, I will figure out how to make time for the tools on a daily basis to continuously help me appreciate and improve my life and my relationships with others.

  1. How am I taking care of my connection to my spiritual life and beliefs? I take time to connect everyday with my gratitude with prayer, gratitude lists, free writing, letter writing, meditation, listening to music, and/or embracing nature. I also connect to other’s in my spiritual community.
  2. How am I taking care of quieting my mind? I use meditation, yoga, nature, breathing exercises, mindfulness meditations, get enough sleep, listen to instrumental or chanting music, and/or practicing presence
  3. How am I taking care of accepting myself in the mirror? I use positive self-talk, affirmations, letter writing, and/or gratitude for what my body does for me.
  4. How am I taking care of my body and organs? I get enough sleep, yoga, dance, walking, drinking lemon water in the morning, water throughout the day, drinking fruit/vegetable smoothies, eating nutritious foods, occasional cleanses, and/or quieting my mind to listen to what my body needs. I also write love letters to my body for loving me and taking care of me on my journey.
  5. How am I checking in with my perspectives of truth (Days 42-46) to make sure they are working in my life? If a perspectives cause me pain, worry, anxiety, depression, fight or flight response, rage, and/or vengefulness, I question what I believe and come up with different ways I can think about the situation. I write letters to help me write new stories. Then I practice applying new perspectives of truth that bring me more peace.
  6. How am I showing myself love? I practice self-care regularly, do things I love to do, get enough sleep, practice positive self-talk, give myself quality time, write myself letters, and take care of my body, mind, and soul.
  7. How am I showing myself respect? I take care of my mind, body, and spiritual self. I have healthy boundaries with others. I honor the person I am. I do the best I can in each moment. I put the oxygen mask on myself first, then I assist others.I take time to breathe. I write myself letters.
  8. How am I investing in my quality time with myself? I go for walks in nature, watch sunsets, write from my heart, do yoga, read, and/or dance.
  9. How do I feed my mind? I read, research, solve puzzles, come up with creative solutions, talk to people who believe differently than I do, and/or try to understand something I didn’t before.
  10. How do I practice presence? I meditate, focus on spots in nature, actively listen to the people I’m with, enjoy what I’m doing, practice mindfulness, or live gratitude.
  11. How do I live gratitude? Write gratitude lists, practice seeing gratitude in day-to-day activities, use gratitude in challenging situations, look to nature with gratitude, look at the love in my life,nd/or meditate with a guided meditation focused on gratitude.
  12. How do I take care of myself in the presence of other’s darkness (fear, anger, rage, resentment, jealousy, envy)? I remind myself, I don’t have to engage in the energy that they are. I take space to strengthen my own energy. I pray for protection from their dark energy. I pray for them to find some light. I pray for guidance in how I communicate with the person if I have to. I take deep breaths to stay calm and peaceful. I laugh with friends. I write letters that I don’t send to properly process what is going on inside of me.
  13. How do I take care of myself in the presence of my own darkness (fear, anger, rage, resentment, jealousy, envy)? I pray, write in my gratitude journal, take deep breaths, practice mindfulness to quiet my mind, write letters of encouragement to myself,  walk, and/or DANCE.
  14. How do I take care of myself when I’m feeling depleted? I get rest, quiet my mind, do yoga, write something inspirational, write letters, sit outside, make time to play, and/or spend time laughing with friends.
  15. How do I take care of myself when I’m feeling a lack (loss, grief, disappointment)? Write down as many things I can be grateful for as possible! I question the perspectives of truth I’m engaging in and I write out as many positive perspectives I can look at instead. I write letters about how I’m abundant in my life. I focus on love instead of grief, opening doors instead of closing ones, and change instead of stagnation. I also pray and work to connect with Source energy.

With this list, I will take the items that can be used to handle multiple areas and work them into my daily self-care regimen. I will look at where I use some of the tools to take care other items on the list and be conscious of where my head is to see how I can best serve myself in the moment. I know I have the tools to live my best life.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful that I have the tools to live my best life.
  2. I’m grateful for my realization of how to better manage my self-care.
  3. I’m grateful for having the time to invest in my own care.
  4. I’m grateful for my ability to help others when I’m taking care of myself.
  5. I’m grateful for how I feel when I take care of myself.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Side note: This letter is not edited intentionally. This list isn’t about being grammatically correct; it’s about just writing out tools however they come out. You can add to sections, delete, and add some more. You want to see the overlap in what you can do on a daily basis to handle multiple items of self-care. Those are the ones you want to implement first.

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 73 – Constructing A Self-Care Regimen

90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 63 – Practicing Mindfulness

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 63: Practicing Mindfulness

“The spirit in which you do something is often as important as the act itself.”

-Mark Williams and Danny Penman, Mindfulness: An Eight-Week Plan for Finding Peace in a Frantic World, pg. 114

In preparation for today, I pulled out my copy of Mindfulness: An Eight-Week Plan for Finding Peace in a Frantic Worldby Mark Williams and Danny Penman. I haven’t touched this book since I read it in school. I opened the book to the page above and read the quote. The energy we put into whatever we are doing affects us. It also affects the energy of the situation we are going into. Then our energy moves with us coming out of the moment and moves into the next. Mindfulness helps us to be conscious of what we are bringing in and what we are taking out of any situation.

Now, there are tons of books, articles, YouTube videos, seminars, and practitioners who teach mindfulness techniques. We are just scratching the surface with today’s topic. My hope is that you will take the seed and find ways to make it grow into something amazing in your life. Mindfulness is an essential step in the path to inner peace.

Today, I’m focusing on mindfulness practices you can do as a part of your daily life. The more we can stay in the moment we are in, the more we will be able to come in and out of situations while staying conscious and in-tune with what is going on inside and around us.

We do many things operating in autopilot, which is like fast-forwarding life. Our minds aren’t where we are. We open ourselves up to being hurt physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually by moving too fast for our feet. Slowing down to be where are feet are is a way we can practice mindfulness. I will give examples of exercises throughout the day to help you add more mindfulness practices to your life. Like I said, these are just a jumping off point. Let these exercises be the spark for more.

Morning Mindfulness Practices

  • The moment you wake-up, take a deep long breath in through your nose for ten seconds. Hold your breath for three seconds. Then release the breath for ten seconds. Do this three times. Make sure you are counting the seconds. This will help you from getting distracted by those thoughts waiting to come in.
  • When you get out of bed, feel the sensations running through your body. Enjoy the feeling of a stretch as you get out of bed. What does that feel like? Take your time to greet the day. If your mind starts going into your to-do list, slow down and just focus on connecting to the way your body feels after being in a resting state.
  • While you are in the shower, focus your energy on what the water feels like as it touches your skin. Feel the pressure of the water and when you are lather up the soap and putting it on your head, enjoy the sensations of the head message. I like to use shampoo and conditioner with mint in it because it makes the sensations very apparent. That is my reminder to stay in the moment. Make sure you like what your products smell like. It will help you want to connect to the moment.
  • As you get dressed, pay attention to the way you put each item of clothing on your body. What arm do you put your shirt in first? Do you put the shirt over your head before you put your arms in? What foot goes in your underwear first? What shoe do you put on first? What does it feel like as you move to get ready?
  • While you are drinking your morning beverage, take your time with each sip that goes into your mouth. Smell the beverage as it goes under your nose. Feel the fluid move around your mouth, to the back of your throat, and through the swallowing process. Be conscious of all the sensations.
  • Take time to savor your breakfast. Before the food even touches your mouth—Smell it. Enjoy the different smells as they interact together. Then feel how the utensils you have to use feel against your hands. Pay attention to the way your body moves to get the food to your mouth. Then as you put the food in your mouth take time to chew it and feel the sensations as the food sits on your taste buds.

Transportation

Stay away from your distracting electronics!
  • While walking outside, look around to take notice of your surroundings. Pay close attention to what is on your path. Look up and see what is around you. Pay attention to nature as you walk. Be right where you are. Enjoy the moment you are in. Acknowledge the life that is around you. If a person walks by, look them in the eye and greet them. If you see an animal, watch them as they watch you.
  • If you are riding bikes, motorcycles, golf carts, etc., feel the sensation of the breeze. Pay attention to how your legs and arms feel. Feel your heart pumping. Keep focused on whatever you are seeing, smelling, feeling, hearing, and if applicable tasting. Use every sense you can.
  • In the car, pay attention to what you hear inside and outside of the car. What does the seat feel like against your skin? What does your foot feel like as you touch the gas and/or brake? What is going through you if someone cuts you off? Did you give yourself enough space? Are you letting another person’s energy affect yours while you are driving? What is keeping you present driving? What is distracting? What does the weather look like? How is the weather affecting the sensations you are feeling in the car?
  • You get a lot of opportunities if you are in a train, taxi, subway, Uber, Lyft, etc.  Take it all in! Use all your senses to stay in the moment and be aware of everything you are seeing outside of you and feeling inside of you. Take the time to look around and see the nature around you. Pay attention to the buildings, sidewalks, people, cars, etc. See if you can get through the whole ride being in the moment. Even if that moment is talking to others, be with them in the conversation. Pay attention to their voices, body language, words, and practice active listening.

Daily Duties

  • At work, practice using all your senses to get you from one point in the day to the next. If you use a computer and your mind starts getting overwhelmed. Pay attention to what your fingers feel like on the keys. If you are constantly interacting with people make sure to take deep breaths and be in the conversation with them. Listen, many times people are telling us important details that we miss if we are thinking about what we are going to say or trying to find ways to end the conversation. You can find mindfulness anytime you engage your senses.
  • Shopping is a fun way to explore your mindfulness. Use your senses as you go through the store. Look up and smile at individuals. Enjoy the experience of smelling, tastings, hearing, seeing, and feeling. Be conscious of what you feel inside as you interact with people and/or things. Acknowledge to yourself what you are feeling. If you don’t like the way you feel, ask yourself what are other feelings you could feel by interpreting the situation differently. Give yourself space to explore other perspectives. If you have a thought that feels better, sit with it for a few seconds. Notice that shift as you move into the next moment.
  • When you going to the bathroom, slow down! Enjoy this break from all the doing and just enjoy the being. Take this time to practice breathing slowly. Bathrooms can be a very peaceful place if we take advantage of the space to just breath and do what our body needs us to do to release what doesn’t belong there anymore.
  • As you’re cooking or being cooked for, smell, taste, touch, and look at each item you are putting into your dish. Pay close attention to the colors, texture, and sensations that move through you as you clean, cut, chop, drop, each item into the master plan. If you are at a restaurant, pay attention to each bite of food.
  • When you are washing dishes feel the water running over your hands. Feel the softness of the soapy bubbles touching your skin. Listen to the noise of the water moving and the dishes clanging. See the how each item comes in and out of your path.

Bedtime

  • Writing in a gratitude journal is a practice in appreciating your mindfulness throughout the day. As we are more mindful throughout the day we appreciate each of our moments in a fuller way. We begin projecting, manifesting, and attracting abundance by hearing, seeing, touching, tasting, and smelling more consciously throughout our day. We become more mindful of our interactions with others as we write about our experiences through the context of gratitude.
  • Put on your nightwear being fully conscious of every decision you are making. Just like putting your clothes on in the morning, be conscious of what limb is going where. Pay attention to your motions and the inner sensations as each item touches your skin.
  • Turn off all electronics and just sit, listen, feel, smell, and breath. Give yourself time to actively release your day before you shut your eyes.

 

Mindfulness is a practice. The more we practice, the better we get. Be patient with yourself. The people who feel our lack of mindfulness most are the people we are closest to. We not only serve ourselves with our mindfulness, we serve all the lives we touch.

Peace on the inside will create peace on the outside. We will benefit from our mindfulness practices as we proceed with the rest of Part III.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 63 – Benefits of Practicing Mindfulness in My Daily Life

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 62 – Clearing Space to Re-Create Our Lives

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 62: Clearing Space to Re-Create Our Lives

“The most important choice you make is what you choose to make important.”

-Michael Neill

We make room for what is important. Our priorities are how we dictate the time we are willing to commit to something. We have to decide how much this journey means to us. How important is living a quality life? Our words don’t mean anything, and our actions mean EVERYTHING when it comes to what we are willing to give to our journeys. There is no room for excuses. If you can’t make the time, you are saying creating the time not your priority.

“Telling yourself that you don’t have enough time for something is a lousy excuse because you NEVER ‘have’ time, you MAKE time!”

-James Malinchak

No more excuses! We have to be willing to MAKE the time re-create our lives or else we are saying, it’s not our priority. For me writing this 90-Day A Better Me Series has been an amazing experience about creating the time for my writing. I used to make excuses that I didn’t have the time to write EVERYDAY. Well, I’ve been writing two pieces or more for 62 days now. This series was important to me, so I made the time. I know how much focusing on this material does to improve my life. I’ve noticed huge differences in how quick I process through different challenges. I’ve also noticed all the blessings that have come with focusing my energy here. Since the gratitude section in Part Two, I’ve even implemented using the gratitude in my daily Letters from A Better Me portion of the series. Making the time to implement that has created so much more space for more things to be grateful for and it has been an AMAZING process even when I’ve had some interesting challenges in the midst of it all.

“Don’t waste your breath proclaiming what’s really important to you. How you spend your time says it all.”

-Eric Zorn

Clearing space to re-create our lives is a choice. A choice only we can make. Only we know whether or not we are ready to make the choice towards love or fear. If you are like me and you’re working on creating a peaceful inner world to contribute to a more peaceful outer world or you have been trying the same thing over and over and nothing is working to help you to find joy in the life your living, well clearing the space is an essential step.

We have to make room for the changes we want to see. This means we have to commit daily time to living our journey and doing the work required to transform our lives.

  • Where can you fit you into your schedule?
  • How important is it for you to be in your schedule?

If you want to change anything in your life, then you better move yourself to the top of your priority list. I’m always amazed how I am able to clear space for the things that matter to me and how much I can get done when I stop telling myself I don’t have the time. Being in our heads sucks up our energy to do the work that needs to be done in order to create the lives we want for ourselves.

If living our journeys is important, we MAKE the time!

The miracle that comes with this practice is once we put ourselves on the top of the priority list, things start shifting opening up space. This can be a little strange, because it may mean someone you spend regular time on moves out of your life, or plans change and get cancelled, or something like an accident on the highway slows us down, but these are all opportunities to make the time to our own journeys. What are you going to do with that time? Our energy can create miracles or blocks. Make sure the energy you are putting out is going to the right place.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 62 -I’m MAKING the Time to CREATE the Life I WANT Today!

 

 

 

 

 

90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 61 – Rebuilding Our Lives on a Stable Foundation

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 61: Rebuilding Our Lives on a Stable Foundation

 “If the house is crooked and crumbling, and the land on which it sits uneven, is it possible to make anything lie straight?”

–Katherine Boo, Behind the Beautiful Foreversp. 254

This quote is where we began on Day 2: Understanding the Journey of Awareness. We spent Part One looking at all our blocks that kept our inner foundation unstable and kept us from being satisfied with the houses we created on the unstable land. Then in Part Two: The Journey of Perspective, we worked on fixing our foundations to make them stable and worthy of building on. We sifted through the fear-based perspectives and replaced them with the energy of love coming from the inside out. Now, we are ready for Part Three: Living the Journey. This is where we take action steps to build on this new foundation and create a house and garden that make us shine. The foundation we are building on now will grow and expand with us. Our houses no longer deteriorate because now we are AWARE of what creates the problems so we are able to fix them at the source before it takes down our house. We can choose to re-model our houses and/or re-frame them as time goes on. We are choosing our changes consciously.

Let’s check some boxes:

  • Awareness our fear-based thinking holding us back
  • Acceptance of our pasts
  • Acceptance of the unknown future
  • Consciousness about the perspectives of truth we are choosing to live by
  • Commitment to live in the energy of love
  • Commitment to live in gratitude
  • Ready to take action

Let’s start the process of rebuilding from our new foundation. Is our land going to be perfect? Not a chance! What we do have is tools to keep it maintained and get rid of any left over toxic muck as is comes up to the surface. Some of our fear-based perspectives of truth are buried deep down and they take longer to surface, but once they do we are ready for it. We are able to process the feelings, work through them and replace the old pattern with something that works better in our lives. Just remember this all takes time. Be patient! Our canvas won’t be complete until we have taken our last breath.

Rebuilding takes work. The more you want to change and shift, the more work you have to put in. No one is forcing you to build your house or create your garden on any time line, but here is the truth of it all. If you don’t do the work and keep up with it, the foundation will become unstable again and anything you try to create on top of toxic land will crumble, fall, and die. Now, when I say work there are instant perspectives of truth that will relate to what work means to you. I’m a believer in working smart. In my perspective working hard has a connotation of fear to it. If I don’t work hard, “I will fail” come into my mind the thought creates stress in my feelings, thoughts, and choices. In this mindset people can become workaholics and can neglect their well-being for the sake of working hard. My method is to work smart. For me, that feels better and causes me less anxiety and stress. It’s good to check-in with yourself on words and concepts to see how they make you feel, because it will affect the energy you put out into the world. If working hard fuels you with the right type of energy to go for it and doesn’t fill you with expectations and attachments related to fear, then use it. Whatever you need to do for you.

During this month we will be building on our foundations built on the energies of faith, hope, gratitude, and love. We will be creating beautiful gardens in our mind and committing to keep working on being the best we can be in each moment we are given.

Living the journey is about letting go of the thinking that keeps us from being present.  We start engaging in the energy that puts us where our feet are. This journey is about embracing the moment we are in, learning to slow down, and taking the steps we need to in order to create a reality that we want to be living in. We can find joy in a single step, hope in the shape of clouds, faith in the energy of Divine love, and gratitude for each breath we are able to take, step we are able to walk, sunset we are see, fruit we are able to taste, and feeling we are able to have. This is a journey about appreciating the moments we are given and letting that energy of gratitude take us into a reality better than we could ever imagine.

Since this section is all about the work, there will be no “Just for Today” section. You choose how much you want a better life and do the work you need to do to get it. If you do the work, your life will change. No one can do it for you. You have to decide.

So, let me ask you—Are you in?

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 61 – I’m Ready to Rebuild My Life