90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 67 – Celebrating What Hasn’t Worked in My Life

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 67: Celebrating What Hasn’t Worked In My Life

Dear Universe,

I’m celebrating what hasn’t worked in my life. There are so many times I thought I knew what was best for me, and found out I knew nothing. My life is so much better because of all the things that didn’t work, which paved the way for things that have and are working.

  • When I was in high school, I got into my dream college only to find out that I couldn’t cover the financial end of things with no other option than not to go. No other schools had the program I wanted. A marriage, divorce, and two kids later, I found a college that had a similar program. I loved going to school with on-line libraries so that I could spend so much time doing research in the comfort of my own home. I had life experiences that helped me understand the material so much better than I could have as an eighteen year old. The women and men I met at school were awesome because the program I attended was for advanced learners.
  • When I didn’t get to go to college, I thought my life was over. I got a customer service job that turned into a career of being a national sales trainer. I got to travel all over the country doing seminars and training individuals to run thriving businesses. I loved my career and the perks were incredible getting to travel to see family and friends on my weekends off.
  • I was in a relationship that I thought was forever. We thought we would move away together and NOTHING worked out. It ended up being an incredible blessing because as I grew healthier by staying where I was, I realized how toxic the relationship was and got out of it without being tied down to a house away from all my positive support. I also picked what I thought would be the perfect time to leave him, and things blew up at what I thought was the ABSOLUTE WORST time, but it wasn’t the case at all. The timing ended up being perfect in the long run!
  • I wrote a book that no publisher wanted to buy. When I went back to re-read it a couple years later, I was able to use the foundation of it start this series, but I saw how weak the book actually was overall. I also got to see the difference when publishers thought the material was weak, and when the material was strong. Great lessons! I’ve had many opportunities to strengthen my writing and my message.
  • I thought my life would look one way when I decided to have kids and it has looked NOTHING like the picture in my head. I’ve had to readjust, learn, and grow with each stage of development. I’ve learned to fully celebrate all that raising them brings up because it keeps me striving to be the best me possible, so that I can love them in the best way possible. I love growing with them.
  • I remember thinking I knew the exact way my romantic life would look. I was wrong. My romantic life is so much different than what I thought it would be at my age, but it is so much better than I could have imagined, because I’m able to enjoy the man I’m with for the person he is and for the life we have together. It isn’t the traditional set-up, but it is perfect for us right in this moment.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful for my past for leading me to where I am now.
  2. I’m grateful for my failed relationships that helped me to appreciate the amazing partner I have now.
  3. I’m grateful that all my prayers don’t have the answers I expect.
  4. I’m grateful for the surprises in life.
  5. I’m grateful for Divine timing.

So much good has come from the things that haven’t worked out in my life.

With Love and Gratitude,

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

 

Check out 10 ways you can really celebrate what doesn’t work:90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 67 – Celebrating What Doesn’t Work

 

 

90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 62 – Clearing Space to Re-Create Our Lives

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 62: Clearing Space to Re-Create Our Lives

“The most important choice you make is what you choose to make important.”

-Michael Neill

We make room for what is important. Our priorities are how we dictate the time we are willing to commit to something. We have to decide how much this journey means to us. How important is living a quality life? Our words don’t mean anything, and our actions mean EVERYTHING when it comes to what we are willing to give to our journeys. There is no room for excuses. If you can’t make the time, you are saying creating the time not your priority.

“Telling yourself that you don’t have enough time for something is a lousy excuse because you NEVER ‘have’ time, you MAKE time!”

-James Malinchak

No more excuses! We have to be willing to MAKE the time re-create our lives or else we are saying, it’s not our priority. For me writing this 90-Day A Better Me Series has been an amazing experience about creating the time for my writing. I used to make excuses that I didn’t have the time to write EVERYDAY. Well, I’ve been writing two pieces or more for 62 days now. This series was important to me, so I made the time. I know how much focusing on this material does to improve my life. I’ve noticed huge differences in how quick I process through different challenges. I’ve also noticed all the blessings that have come with focusing my energy here. Since the gratitude section in Part Two, I’ve even implemented using the gratitude in my daily Letters from A Better Me portion of the series. Making the time to implement that has created so much more space for more things to be grateful for and it has been an AMAZING process even when I’ve had some interesting challenges in the midst of it all.

“Don’t waste your breath proclaiming what’s really important to you. How you spend your time says it all.”

-Eric Zorn

Clearing space to re-create our lives is a choice. A choice only we can make. Only we know whether or not we are ready to make the choice towards love or fear. If you are like me and you’re working on creating a peaceful inner world to contribute to a more peaceful outer world or you have been trying the same thing over and over and nothing is working to help you to find joy in the life your living, well clearing the space is an essential step.

We have to make room for the changes we want to see. This means we have to commit daily time to living our journey and doing the work required to transform our lives.

  • Where can you fit you into your schedule?
  • How important is it for you to be in your schedule?

If you want to change anything in your life, then you better move yourself to the top of your priority list. I’m always amazed how I am able to clear space for the things that matter to me and how much I can get done when I stop telling myself I don’t have the time. Being in our heads sucks up our energy to do the work that needs to be done in order to create the lives we want for ourselves.

If living our journeys is important, we MAKE the time!

The miracle that comes with this practice is once we put ourselves on the top of the priority list, things start shifting opening up space. This can be a little strange, because it may mean someone you spend regular time on moves out of your life, or plans change and get cancelled, or something like an accident on the highway slows us down, but these are all opportunities to make the time to our own journeys. What are you going to do with that time? Our energy can create miracles or blocks. Make sure the energy you are putting out is going to the right place.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 62 -I’m MAKING the Time to CREATE the Life I WANT Today!

 

 

 

 

 

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 61 – I’m Ready to Rebuild My Life

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 61: I’m Ready to Rebuild My Life

Dear Self,

The time is now and I’m ready to take my journey a step further and start living it. I’m committing to do the work that it will take to rebuild my life from the place I am now. I’m ready to commit to the work it will take to get me live this journey with love, gratitude, hope and faith. I know that every step I take is an important step on this journey and I don’t want to miss it.

I’m choosing to work smart. I need to be conscious of my priorities so that I may honor them and shift them as necessary to live the life of my choosing. I’M CHOOSING! I’m responsible for the energy I put into my journey. I’m not going to blame anybody else for the energy I’m putting into it. I can choose to let fear-based energy grow and fester, or I can choose to release it and replace it with the energy I want to be going into this day, this moment. I know the energy I choose right now will affect how the lessons on my journey play out. I’m committed to choosing wisely.

I know in order to choose wisely, I have to do the work to maintain this new way of looking at life. I have to make I engage in regular practices using the new thought processes. Otherwise those fear-based ones will creep back in. I’m ready!

I’m committing to be more loving, compassionate and empathetic to myself as I transition out of fear-based actions. I will simply do the best I can and learn from the times that I choose fear over love. There will be no more creating of toxic muck by contributing to self-abuse. I’m ready to transform my life by making the choice to live it!

Let the work begin!

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful for my right to choose my energy that I’m letting lead me
  2. I’m grateful for the ability shift from moment to moment .
  3. I’m grateful for making the choice to invest time into the work I need to do in order for my life to be better.
  4. I’m grateful for this journey with all it’s growing and learning.
  5. I’m grateful to feel ready to live my life from a loving place.

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 61 – Rebuilding Our Lives on a Stable Foundation

 

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 60 -Right Here and Now I’m Free

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part II: A Journey of Perspective

What Launches Us Forward: The Stable Foundation

Day 60: Right Here and Now I’m Free

Dear Self,

Right in this moment I’m feeling my toes tingle under the wind from the fan above me. I’m hearing the roar of the air coming on and the coolness touch my toes. My thoughts are with my fingers as the words are coming out on the page. Right hear and now I’m free. My mind is a blanket canvas to create whatever reality I choose with each story I decide to believe and follow. I can choose to be conscious and or unconscious with each thought and step I take. I can choose to put my feelings about my spirituality in a container, or I can be in awe of how expansive Divine energy is. I can choose to see each moment as a loving gift from my Creator or a hell on Earth. I’m FREE to choose whatever perspective of truth I want to believe in this very moment and whatever I choose will move me to the actions that go with that.

Right here and now I’m free to be silent, pray, listen, receive, give, and to move in a way that will contribute to the way I tell myself is right for the moment. I’m responsible for the choices I make. The more I listen to the moment, the clearer of an understanding I get for what I need to step into my next moment. Thinking about this process in slow motion is pretty amazing. Right here and now I’m free and I have an abundance of choices, but the choices aren’t overwhelming, because I have peace knowing I’m free.

I still feel my toes tingling. I’m conscious of the noises that are coming from tapping the keys on the keyboard. I feel my dog’s presence up against the side of my leg as she peacefully sleeps. The words are coming out of me as I hear them and I can hear no background clutter in my mind at this very moment. I can feel the sensations in my nose as oxygen comes into my body. I can feel the moisture on the tips of my fingers as they move across the keys. In this moment I feel AWE of all I’m experiencing without the distractions and clutter that come with the stories of the past and the future. I’m free.

Today I’m grateful

  1. I’m so grateful to experience this present moment
  2. I’m grateful for the freedom to choose where my mind goes in this moment
  3. I’m grateful to be free of story in this moment
  4. I’m grateful for all the sensations I can feel to keep me in this moment
  5. I’m grateful for the feeling of AWE that brings tears to my eyes and fills my soul with love

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

Side note: I’ve chosen to not edit this letter because I want it to be authentic to the moment I was in writing it. When we write letters to ourselves they don’t have to be perfect. My letter writing in this series is to allow you to see vulnerable parts of me. How you judge them reflects your perspectives of truth inside of you. Be present to what goes through you. Our responses to other’s vulnerability have so much to teach us about where we are in the moment whether it is in love or fear-based thinking. It also helps us to see where we do and don’t want to be. When we consciously see that, we can choose our next step wisely.

Rachael Wolff © 2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 60 – Right Here and NOW

90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 60 – Right Here and NOW

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part II: A Journey of Perspective

What Launches Us Forward: The Stable Foundation

Day 60: Right Here and NOW

“Enjoy the moment, not the end result.”

-Lee Ann Womack

Today is the day to redefine our lives. Nothing before today or after today is real—It’s a story. Everything is how we define it to be. It doesn’t matter what the story of our past is or what the dreams of our future are if we are not living in today. We actively destroy the good stuff from coming into our lives by focusing on anywhere but RIGHT HERE AND RIGHT NOW.

Take the lessons from the past, but leave the story behind. Have goals for the future but leave the attachment to your happiness behind. What we feel, what we think, what we believe, how we act, and how we respond and/or react in this moment will dictate each step that falls after that. This is not the time to be going into autopilot.

What are you going to choose to do today to contribute to you living your best life right now?

Most of us (including me) aren’t going to do this perfectly, so don’t put that expectation on yourself. What will make the most difference is doing the best we can in each moment we are conscious. The more we practice to bring ourselves back to the moment, the longer we will be able to stay in the moment.

What are the things that connect you to the present moment?

We want to have touchstones that remind us to pay attention to what is going on right now, such as spotting things in nature, a specific daily time to read, meditate, pray, exercise, walk, etc. It’s not about what I do to get me into my present moment; it’s about picking the things that touch your life.

I know I’ve talked about this before, but this is so important that it is worth mentioning again, especially knowing that even if you have read this entire series, you will probably retain about 10% of the material, and it will be the parts that you associate most with right now. That 10% is the seeds you decide to plant. You will have some seeds you hold onto for later that will all the sudden pop up in your mind out of nowhere. They usually will come up in a moment of presence. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been out walking and all the sudden remember something I saw, read, or listened to that is the perfect tool to use in my current situation. When we are quite, we leave space for our prayers to be answered—Seeds appear. There will also be plenty of seeds in my work that don’t fit into the beautiful foundation that you are creating for yourself. You may give them to someone else or toss them aside. This is your life. The more we can live in right here and right now, the more connected we will be to the choices we make.

We want to make sure we are putting our energy where we want it to be. We can only do that if we stay present. If we don’t work on our practices in presence, which we will talk more about in Part III, we will continue to be swept away by fear-based ways of thinking. When we practice presence, we start to see things as they are building up inside. We may start noticing when we are triggered after we already yelled back in a fear-based way. Then with practice, we might catch ourselves mid-scream. With more practice, we start catching it the moment before a scream is about to leave our mouths. With even more practice, we start spotting it as the feelings start stirring inside us. Here’s where the practice gets really awesome! We will start noticing another person’s energy as they begin to engage with us. We will be able to see if they are coming from a place of love or fear. We’ve slowed down enough to start asking them questions to see their own perspective clearly, then we can respond to them from a loving place to allow them the opportunity to see our perspective without telling them we are right and they are wrong. This may take years for some especially if we come from a childhood where screaming was a normal occurrence.

The more we connect to the present moment, the less attached we become to the stories that keep us hostage to our pasts and prisoners of our unknown future. We begin to authentically interact with the people in front of us. There is a reason I have chosen each day of this journey to represent what it does in this 90-Day series. This is a process and not one we will get fully the first time we read through and start practicing. We have a lot of undoing in order to start re-building. Presence makes it clear what in us we need to work through to be in the best place to create the lives we actually want.

Just for Today

  • What choices are you making right now to live better than you did yesterday? Be conscious of your feelings, thoughts, beliefs, stories, actions, reactions, responses, and where your feet literally are in this moment.
  • How is what you are doing right now working for or against you? Now, decide to do something better in this moment.  Anytime you catch yourself, just slow down and make a choice to do something right now that will make things better for the moment you are in.

NO BEATING YOURSELF UP for not doing things perfect. We talked about the detriments of that in Part I.

The more we can focus on the person we are being in this very moment, the more successful we will be at achieving abundance in our lives.

Tomorrow, we are moving into Part III: Living the Journey. I hope you will continue to transform with me. Enjoy today!

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 60 -Right Here and Now I’m Free

 

 

 

90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 52 – Seeing Our Own Value

90-Day A Better Me Series

Part II: A Journey of Perspective

What Launches Us Forward: The Stable Foundation

Day 52: Seeing Our Own Value

“Self respect, self worth and self love, all start with self. Stop looking outside of yourself for value.”

– Rob Liano

When we expect others, careers, skills, and/or circumstances to define our value, we are looking outside of ourselves. We start believing perspectives of truth that tells us:

  • Having this relationship makes me valuable
  • Having this career makes me valuable
  • Having this skill makes me valuable
  • Having this circumstance makes me valuable

We can enjoy having those things in our life when we are there, but if we strap our identities and value to having them, we become unstable. This is why so many people have the feeling of losing themselves after losing a job. This is why people struggle to fine meaning after they can’t perform a skill that they felt defined them. These outside things can bring out our darkness when we attach to them. We FEAR the death of who we are if we lose them. We don’t know who to be without them. Dark energies like fear, shame, guilt, hate, revenge, rage, entitlement, jealousy, etc. come from attaching to what’s outside of us.

We are 100% worthy and valuable of the air we breathe right here and now exactly as we are. We are 100% worthy and valuable even at the height of our challenges to find our way in the world. We are 100% worthy and valuable no matter what darkness and/or light we carry within us. Nobody outside of us needs to see our value and worth to live an AMAZING life—Only we do.

I may have a meaningful relationship fail. I may be in an abusive relationship. I may get fired/laid off from a job unexpectedly. I may be a surgeon then break my hand. I may be wealthy then lose all my money. My lesson is what does the journey have to teach me about who I am. How am I able to see myself being reflected back to me, and how can I fix any darkness I’m feeling within me. This doesn’t mean that we won’t grieve the losses of the people/things we care about. The more we are connected to our positive self-worth, the clearer the lines are of the grief. If we put our identity into a loss, we are grieving the loss of the illusion of an identity. That takes a lot more work to sort through than the loss of something or someone we know is outside of us. Many people have confused this to the point of taking their own lives because they didn’t see their inner value and worth.

We can get so attached to what is outside of us that we give no time to looking inside us. We avoid looking through all the things I talked about in Part I of the 90-Day A Better Me Series. It’s time to change that!

  • What qualities do you have that make your soul shine?
  • What light do you bring to the world?
  • What is your capacity to love?
  • How can you expand that?

“The frequency of your Light depends upon your consciousness. When you shift the level of your consciousness, you shift the frequency of your light.”

-Gary Zukav

We project out the amount of light (love-fueled energy) we have inside of us. Think of a room with a dimmer switch. The greatest amount of love is the light shining at full capacity using the full amount of energy, but this light doesn’t drain energy, it creates more energy. How we value ourselves is controlling that dimmer switch. I’m going to project this much light, so that is the amount that will come back…Law of Attraction. When we raise our value switch, our light get brighter, it makes the room brighter. It then attracts people who are attracted to that brightness and it deters people who can’t handle that level of bright. I’ve been watching how this works in my life and the lives of others around me. It always fascinates me how increasing our light shifts what is going on around us. The brighter we shine from the inside the less attachments we get to things outside of us. The “stuff” just doesn’t have the same effect on our lives like it did before.

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Our value is already within us. We just have to open our eyes to see it. We may need to change the lens we are looking through to get a better view, but it’s there, waiting to be discovered.  We have to stop denying ourselves the time, so that we give ourselves the attention we need. We have to question why we put other people’s value above our own. No one is more or less worthy and valuable than we are. We can learn from those who are driven by their darkness, which gives their life value and worth. They are actually great teachers in the importance of seeing our value own value and not putting value in the outside stuff that in the end doesn’t matter. Those outside people and circumstances can teach us the value in being present instead of attaching to some unknown future. The more we can see that our pain and struggles are a part of our growth, not a hindrance to it—WE THRIVE!

In the end, our value lies in one simple statement—I AM! That is the complete statement of value. We are here. We are living. We are experiencing this journey of life. We are learning from our choices of feelings, thoughts, beliefs, actions, and reactions. We are ever changing and shifting being driven by the light and/or the darkness within us. Embrace the person you are! You are having the exact experiences you need in this life to fulfill your purpose in this life. We simply choose whether we will fulfill it through our light or through our dark. Our quality of the life we live is up to us. The VALUE of our life is there. The question is…

Are you ready to turn up your dimmer switch and bring more loving energy into yourself and into the world?

Just for Today

Make time to do something nurturing for yourself. Show yourself that you are valuable and worthy of your own time and attention! If you can’t think of things you can do: Imagine your ideal perfect relationship. What would you want someone to do to show you that you are valuable to him/her? Come up with a list. What on that list can you do for yourself to show you that you are valuable to yourself? Never expect anyone give more to you than you are willing to give to yourself. You are the example others are following.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Today’s Letter from A Better Me is 90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 52 – I See My Value. Thanks for reading!

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Month of Gratitude

A couple years ago I took a challenge on Facebook. EVERY day I wrote what I was grateful for in the month of November.This wasn’t the first time I dedicated a few minutes of my day to gratitude. I have used it as a tool for about seven years. When I can’t seem to get my head out of the vicious spin cycle, I go to gratitude. Now that I have a Facebook page: From A Loving Place (click on the red to take you to the page), I decided I wanted to share the gifts that come with focusing our energy in a more loving and appreciative place. If you have Facebook and would like to join in on the experience, please like the page, click “Following” then click on “See First” doing this will ensure that the daily dose of gratitude shows up in your News Feed.

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The state of gratitude raises our vibrational energy and we start attracting amazing people and adventures to our lives. We also help heal the world, because when our focus is there, we don’t get pulled down by other people’s drama. We also become clear enough to see solutions and alternative thought patterns. I hope you will join me in spreading gratitude.

If you don’t have Facebook, I hope you will commit to yourself to write down three things your grateful for each day. Here’s a trick to getting the most out of it: You have to completely engage the feeling of gratitude. Feel the awe of the moment that you are grateful for, and revel in the feeling for a second. I will warn you, some blessings might be disguised as chaos at first. STICK TO IT! Miracles come after the chaos. Our ego gets used to being in control and when we try to break free sometimes everything can look worse, but push through. The miracles are on the other side. If you are anything like me, they will be better than anything you could have imagined was possible.

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Keep your head in the gratitude. Don’t utter the words, “I can’t believe this is happening!” Don’t think or say any variation of it. Saying things like that actually sabotage the good in our life. We send a message out there that we don’t deserve the good that is happening to us, then we start looking for reasons it’s not as good as it seems. Our focus becomes stuck there instead of in the gratitude, so we start finding flaws. Before we know it, the great thing that happened is gone. I learned that lesson over and over again the hard way, I mean beat down with the emotional 2×4 hard way.

No matter what you decide to do today, I hope you have a grateful day!

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff

You can also find me on Twitter sharing daily gratitude @Wolffspirit9

A Better Life Begins With Gratitude Click this link to read more about the power of gratitude.

 

Prepared to Learn: Getting an Unexpected Lesson

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I recently attended the final Hay House I Can Do It conference in Ft. Lauderdale. I was amazed with all the speakers. I took tons of notes and listened to every detail that I could get to stick. I was surrounded by over 1,000 positive and loving people  in one room. The energy of the room lifted me up to amazing levels. I was in learning mode. I expected to get a lot from the speakers over this two-day event. Day One, I was overjoyed with all the powerful information and tools I was getting to take on my day. I was charged…

So, with all of that going on, how could I be attacked with such rage and anger? As my two friends and I were coming in from eating our awesome leftovers from Mellow Mushroom, I was excitedly engaged in a conversation about all the amazing information and inspiration. I had one eye in front of me and one focused on my friend. Our other friend was walking a few steps behind. All the sudden my foot hits a foot in front of me. Baffled and confused, I of course apologize to the usher I tripped on, but I had no idea how I had missed her. I was looking ahead. She instantly jumps into attack mode, got in my face, and started screaming at me at the top of her lungs. “Watch where you are going! Do you think you can just walk all over people?…” My friends and I were in total shock at this interaction. Fight-flight response took over. I went into feeling like a scared little girl being blamed for something I didn’t do and didn’t understand. My friend on the other hand went into fight mode, but luckily with all the great energy we had sucked in, knew it was best to talk to a supervisor and simply say, “Bless you!” Our other friend, who saw the whole thing, just kept repeating, “Do not engage, bless you, bless you, bless you.”

After we walked away,  I was told the woman had sped around me and was aimed at cutting around me but had to walk in my path to avoid the people sitting on the bench. The reason I never saw her is because she cut over into my walking space and I couldn’t catch her in my peripheral because my head was turned to the right. I was in such shock, my nerves were on edge. Every usher I passed made me feel like a scared little girl trying to avoid a dangerous stranger. I walked with complete tension and my heart wouldn’t stop pounding. I couldn’t understand how this could have happened here of all places. I needed this conference. I needed to be filled with the energy to get me out of the grief I’d been facing because of the recent passing of my “Gifted Mom”(my dad’s partner). I just had surgery on my face and needed to stop being so focused on that. How could this have happened here and now?  Haven’t I gone through enough in the last six weeks?

We went back to our seats, and I knew I wasn’t up for reporting the incident. I just needed to get myself out of the trauma and into a better head space so I could enjoy and absorb the rest of the event. I knew if I stayed where I was,  I wouldn’t get what I needed. So my friends went off to report the incident and I sat in silence.

Deep breaths and connect, deep breaths and connect. I know this happened for a reason, I started with a prayer: “Help me to figure out the reason for this lesson, so I can move on from it and stay connected to the energy of love and gratitude.” Deep breaths, deep breaths, I was so grateful I had just heard techniques to get me out of this. Davidji talked about the power of connection and mediation, “Connect to our guardian soul.” was one of the messages I wrote down. He also talked about the fight-flight response and what happens physically and emotionally to us when its happening. He quoted Pema Chodron, “The things you cling to make you unavailable to learn something new.” I knew I had to re-connect and get passed this. The situation with the usher happened after I just heard all this. My friends came back and told me the manager apologized and they would look into it. They were going to meet her again after the next break. My breathing steadied, but my adrenaline was still coming down and had a ways to go.

Kris Carr  was up next, somehow I knew I was going to get the answers I needed. She quoted Louise Hay who said, “It’s only a thought, and a thought can be changed.” My mantra, “Deep breaths, connect, deep breaths, connect.” Mastin Kipp followed Carr.  Kipp said, “Negative emotions are a call to awareness.” YES! YES! YES! My Aha moment arrived. One of my biggest challenges I’ve faced in my life is my connection to being blamed for something I didn’t do. It stemmed from when I was a little girl. This negative exchange took me right back to being that defenseless little girl. I have been dealing with this negative thought pattern for a long time. It had been so long since it was engaged, I buried it. When I was in high school, these thoughts made me suicidal. Luckily, or I should say I was protected because both times it happened I was in places where I could get help immediately. I needed to once again face this fear, but this time with fresh tools to get through it.  I once again was protected and in the perfect situation to get the help I needed.  I will tell you, nothing makes techniques stick better than applying them right away.

After the next break, we found out the woman thought that we were 19-20 year olds. I like to think I look young, but that is a little drastic. She didn’t see us at all. She was wrapped up in her own head feeling walked on by the younger generations. Her reaction had nothing at all to do with me. I knew that logically, but knowing she had no concept of the fact that we were all over double that age, I knew I was looking at a very hurt and wounded woman. I could see her with eyes of compassion and pray for her healing. I could also look at how far I had come from my younger self. I got exactly what I needed, which made me think of something Mastin Kipp said, “What’s the spiritual lesson in this?…This is happening for you, not to you.”

The rest of the day, I continued to get what I needed. Cheryl Richardson asked, “Are you willing to take your own heroes’ journey?” My reply, “YES!!” Gregg Braden was the final speaker. He showed us a technique to help the heart and the brain to work together. The coolest part is it was all based on science. Very interesting findings!! The event was over, I left better than I came and in a very short time, I grew.

How we look at things and deal with the people and events around us is so important. If we are responding negatively to our situation, we are putting that hurtful energy into ourselves then breathing it back into the world. We need to ask ourselves, is this what we want? Are we going to miss opportunities from being caught up in a fight-flight response? Are we getting caught up in negative thoughts that can change to more positive ones? What is my lesson? How can I be and do better to serve myself and humanity?

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff