90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 78 – I’m Triggered! Using Self-Reflection to Heal My Energy

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 78: I’m triggered! Using Self-Reflection to Heal My Energy

Dear Self,

I had an exchange with a woman where I felt completely triggered. I felt attacked and like the person was saying that my perspective was wrong and unhealthy. Now, this person doesn’t live the kind of life that I want to be living, so why am I taking what she said personally. That’s her perspective according to how she chooses to live her life. If I REALLY could fully embrace that, I wouldn’t be having a reaction right now. I wouldn’t choose to feel victimized by her words. I really need to go deeper to figure out what this exchange has triggered in me.

Maybe the part in me that isn’t fully healed from being a people pleaser—I wanted her to agree, like, and respect me and she doesn’t. It also may be that she reminds me of my childhood when I was talked down to like I didn’t know what I was talking about and that my view was treated with disrespect. I remember feeling small and inferior during those times. I felt unheard and unimportant. I felt unworthy. Ok, this definitely doesn’t have anything to do with the woman I was just interacting with because her opinion of me is encompassed by her own darkness. I’m really okay with her not agreeing with me.

Now that I know I’m not dealing with this woman’s opinion being the problem, I can dig deeper to the parts of me that are still working through feeling unworthy. The perspectives of truth I’m choosing to believe are making me feel weak and inferior. I’m not that little girl anymore. I’m a woman of strength, courage, love, and hope. The way I’m feeling in this moment isn’t reflecting the beliefs I live by now. My perspectives of truth bring my life peace and joy. I don’t see any reason to continue to believe that I’m a victim of other people’s opinions. I know my worth! I don’t need anyone else to know it.

Ok, I’m feeling a little calmer, but I’m still not sure I can 100% promise that I’m going to be able to communicate with this woman from a loving place, so I will sit, meditate, pray, and remain silent until I feel that my communication will be worthy of the energy I want to project out into the world. I definitely don’t want someone’s darkness to affect my light. If I’m meant to have another exchange with her, I trust that the opportunity will arise.

I just need to keep in mind what it is I stand for. I need to focus on how best to communicate without taking on the energy of people who are out there showing their darkness. The question I need to ask myself is… How do I shine my light here? If I feel clear about the answer, if the answer brings me peace, I know I’m in a healthy place.People can only trigger me if I let them. I only let them if I’m facing some darkness within me. When I’m honest with myself—I get better! My energy now is aligned with the energy I want to project out into the world.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful I ALWAYS have a choice in how I view a situation.
  2. I’m grateful for the power of self-reflection to get me out of my own dark energy.
  3. I’m grateful for other people giving me the chance to learn more about myself.
  4. I’m grateful that I’ve learned how to love myself, so that I know my worth.
  5. I’m SO grateful for my ability to change and be better.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Need more inspiration? Read 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 78 – Using Self-Reflection When We Are Triggered

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 74 -Who Am I Inviting Into My Internal Home

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 74: Who Am I Inviting Into My Internal Home?

Dear Self,

I’m responsible for who I invite into my internal home, so it is my job to look at who I am inviting in. Just because I have an exchange with someone in the physical world, it doesn’t mean I HAVE to invite her/him in. I don’t have to let them have control over my feelings, thoughts, perspectives of truth, actions, and reactions. I MAKE MY OWN CHOICES.

I commit to be conscious of how my feelings, thoughts, and beliefs about a person are inviting them into my internal home. I’m choosing for them to have an affect on my inner world. I’m allowing them to alter and move things not because of who they are in my physical world, but who I’m creating them to be inside of me.

I need to look at if my thoughts about this person are contributing to my feelings of abundance or lack, love or fear, compassion or judgment.  Is their presence in my home brightening my light or dulling it. Is it creating open door or locking doors? I’m I creating more walls in my home by having them there or am I creating an open concept where the energy just flows?

These are all questions I need to ask myself when I consider who I’m inviting into my internal home.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful for the choice of who I allow into my internal home.
  2. I’m grateful for the awareness I have to see my responsibility and power.
  3. I’m grateful for the opportunity to investigate who I’m allowing in.
  4. I’m grateful for my ability to create light in any dark room in my home.
  5. I’m grateful for my consciousness.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 74 – Inviting Visitors Into Our Internal Homes

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 70 – Doing What I Love

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 70: Doing What I Love

Dear Self,

You are just as important as all of the people I serve, so I’m honoring our journey by committing to do things I love daily. I want move through life with the energy of doing what I love to do. I know that by doing this, I will manifest more of what I love and will attract others around me who share my passions. There is no good reason not to spend time doing what I love to do daily. I know I might not be able to everything I love in one day, but I will commit to doing something I love EVERYDAY!

Here is a list of things I love doing:

  • Dancing to music with positive messages
  • Writing
  • Walking around the lake to look at the birds gathering at the island at the center of the lake
  • Nature walks and hiking off-trail
  • Going to the dog beach with my dog
  • Laughing
  • Yoga
  • Quality time with my family
  • Quality time with my friends
  • Quiet time to meditate and quiet my brain
  • Helping others discover their best selves
  • Eating flavorful foods
  • Spending Time Communicating with the Divine

With this list there is no excuses!  I can even add more things I love, because as I engage in this energy, more space will open up. I know if I don’t make time for doing the things I love, it’s because I’m not on my priority list and when I’m not on my priority list, things fall through the cracks. So, why not? I deserve my own time! The people I love deserve me to be operating as the best version of myself too.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful that I can MAKE time to do the things I love.
  2. I’m grateful for the energy I feel when I’m doing the things I love.
  3. I’m grateful for the joy that I feel when get to share my love with others.
  4. I’m grateful for today as an opportunity to do what I love to do.
  5. I’m grateful when I notice when it’s a good time to do what I love.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Are you doing what you love? 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 70 – Doing What We Love

 

 

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 67 – Celebrating What Hasn’t Worked in My Life

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 67: Celebrating What Hasn’t Worked In My Life

Dear Universe,

I’m celebrating what hasn’t worked in my life. There are so many times I thought I knew what was best for me, and found out I knew nothing. My life is so much better because of all the things that didn’t work, which paved the way for things that have and are working.

  • When I was in high school, I got into my dream college only to find out that I couldn’t cover the financial end of things with no other option than not to go. No other schools had the program I wanted. A marriage, divorce, and two kids later, I found a college that had a similar program. I loved going to school with on-line libraries so that I could spend so much time doing research in the comfort of my own home. I had life experiences that helped me understand the material so much better than I could have as an eighteen year old. The women and men I met at school were awesome because the program I attended was for advanced learners.
  • When I didn’t get to go to college, I thought my life was over. I got a customer service job that turned into a career of being a national sales trainer. I got to travel all over the country doing seminars and training individuals to run thriving businesses. I loved my career and the perks were incredible getting to travel to see family and friends on my weekends off.
  • I was in a relationship that I thought was forever. We thought we would move away together and NOTHING worked out. It ended up being an incredible blessing because as I grew healthier by staying where I was, I realized how toxic the relationship was and got out of it without being tied down to a house away from all my positive support. I also picked what I thought would be the perfect time to leave him, and things blew up at what I thought was the ABSOLUTE WORST time, but it wasn’t the case at all. The timing ended up being perfect in the long run!
  • I wrote a book that no publisher wanted to buy. When I went back to re-read it a couple years later, I was able to use the foundation of it start this series, but I saw how weak the book actually was overall. I also got to see the difference when publishers thought the material was weak, and when the material was strong. Great lessons! I’ve had many opportunities to strengthen my writing and my message.
  • I thought my life would look one way when I decided to have kids and it has looked NOTHING like the picture in my head. I’ve had to readjust, learn, and grow with each stage of development. I’ve learned to fully celebrate all that raising them brings up because it keeps me striving to be the best me possible, so that I can love them in the best way possible. I love growing with them.
  • I remember thinking I knew the exact way my romantic life would look. I was wrong. My romantic life is so much different than what I thought it would be at my age, but it is so much better than I could have imagined, because I’m able to enjoy the man I’m with for the person he is and for the life we have together. It isn’t the traditional set-up, but it is perfect for us right in this moment.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful for my past for leading me to where I am now.
  2. I’m grateful for my failed relationships that helped me to appreciate the amazing partner I have now.
  3. I’m grateful that all my prayers don’t have the answers I expect.
  4. I’m grateful for the surprises in life.
  5. I’m grateful for Divine timing.

So much good has come from the things that haven’t worked out in my life.

With Love and Gratitude,

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

 

Check out 10 ways you can really celebrate what doesn’t work:90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 67 – Celebrating What Doesn’t Work

 

 

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 66 – Quieting My Mind

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 66: Quieting My Mind

Dear Self,

I’m committing a minimum of 30 minutes a day to quieting my mind. I’m making the conscious choice to MAKE the time to de-clutter my thoughts to MAKE space for conscious creation of the things I want more of in my life. I’m choosing to free write, doodle, and consciously drink my water for 45 days straight (See list of items to choose from by clicking here).

Each day I’m committing to sit down and TAKE the time to SLOW DOWN. I want to consciously create my life like it is a work of art. I can’t do that with all the clutter. Otherwise it will just be scribble over scribble with no color except for black and white. I’m choosing to make the effort to re-train my brain to work for me and the life I’m creating.

This time I’m making is essential for my well-being. There is so much going on in my head and in the world that I’m feeling overloaded trying to process it all. I feel like it’s beginning to fry my circuits and creating a numbing effect on my life. I want and deserve better and I’m going to treat myself that way. I want to create consciously. I want to live consciously.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful for the moments my mind is quiet.
  2. I’m grateful for the opportunity to make time to focus on quieting my mind.
  3. I’m grateful at the art I create with a quiet mind.
  4. I’m grateful for my clarity of thought with my quiet mind.
  5. I’m grateful for so many choices of methods to quiet my mind.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 66 – Quieting the Mind for Conscious Creation

 

 

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 62 -I’m MAKING the Time to CREATE the Life I WANT Today!

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part III: Living the Journey

Making the Now Count: Rebuilding our Lives

Day 62: I’m MAKING the Time to CREATE the Life I WANT Today!

Dear Universe,

I’m making the time to create the life I want today. I trust you Universe to provide the space to help me take care of my energy and give me the time to do the things I need to do in order to work on me. I will commit specific times to do something to contribute to practices that will help me keep my energy in the best place possible. I will trust that if I need more time than what I’m giving myself that you will create the space for me.

I know that I can make the most of each moment I have or use up my energy complaining about not having time. That moment is time I have to do something different. I can choose to be grateful in that moment in time instead of being in a place of lack of time. I’m making more space as my mind is open to be creative with the energy I’m putting out there.

I’m choosing to the twists and turns of life as opportunities for me to commit my time to making the most out of the moment by seeing what I can learn and how I can grow. I’m making the time to create the life I want. Even right now, I’m choosing to write this letter to help me stay in the space of my growth and expansion. I could be choosing to watch TV or be on social media, but in this moment, this is what I made the time to do. I feel great about my decision.

Today I’m Grateful

  1. I’m grateful for the miracle of space and time.
  2. I’m grateful for the choices I can make to give me more time.
  3. I’m grateful to the Universe that helps find me the time I need.
  4. I’m grateful to my perspectives of truth for allowing me to grow and expand.
  5. I’m grateful for the people who are brought into my life who inspire me to live my best life.

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

 

Rachael Wolff ©2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 62 – Clearing Space to Re-Create Our Lives

 

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series: Day 60 -Right Here and Now I’m Free

Letters from A Better Me

90-Day A Better Me Letters Series

Part II: A Journey of Perspective

What Launches Us Forward: The Stable Foundation

Day 60: Right Here and Now I’m Free

Dear Self,

Right in this moment I’m feeling my toes tingle under the wind from the fan above me. I’m hearing the roar of the air coming on and the coolness touch my toes. My thoughts are with my fingers as the words are coming out on the page. Right hear and now I’m free. My mind is a blanket canvas to create whatever reality I choose with each story I decide to believe and follow. I can choose to be conscious and or unconscious with each thought and step I take. I can choose to put my feelings about my spirituality in a container, or I can be in awe of how expansive Divine energy is. I can choose to see each moment as a loving gift from my Creator or a hell on Earth. I’m FREE to choose whatever perspective of truth I want to believe in this very moment and whatever I choose will move me to the actions that go with that.

Right here and now I’m free to be silent, pray, listen, receive, give, and to move in a way that will contribute to the way I tell myself is right for the moment. I’m responsible for the choices I make. The more I listen to the moment, the clearer of an understanding I get for what I need to step into my next moment. Thinking about this process in slow motion is pretty amazing. Right here and now I’m free and I have an abundance of choices, but the choices aren’t overwhelming, because I have peace knowing I’m free.

I still feel my toes tingling. I’m conscious of the noises that are coming from tapping the keys on the keyboard. I feel my dog’s presence up against the side of my leg as she peacefully sleeps. The words are coming out of me as I hear them and I can hear no background clutter in my mind at this very moment. I can feel the sensations in my nose as oxygen comes into my body. I can feel the moisture on the tips of my fingers as they move across the keys. In this moment I feel AWE of all I’m experiencing without the distractions and clutter that come with the stories of the past and the future. I’m free.

Today I’m grateful

  1. I’m so grateful to experience this present moment
  2. I’m grateful for the freedom to choose where my mind goes in this moment
  3. I’m grateful to be free of story in this moment
  4. I’m grateful for all the sensations I can feel to keep me in this moment
  5. I’m grateful for the feeling of AWE that brings tears to my eyes and fills my soul with love

 

With Love and Gratitude,

 

A Better Me

Side note: I’ve chosen to not edit this letter because I want it to be authentic to the moment I was in writing it. When we write letters to ourselves they don’t have to be perfect. My letter writing in this series is to allow you to see vulnerable parts of me. How you judge them reflects your perspectives of truth inside of you. Be present to what goes through you. Our responses to other’s vulnerability have so much to teach us about where we are in the moment whether it is in love or fear-based thinking. It also helps us to see where we do and don’t want to be. When we consciously see that, we can choose our next step wisely.

Rachael Wolff © 2019

Don’t forget to read today’s companion piece: 90-Day A Better Me Series: Day 60 – Right Here and NOW

Letters From A Better Me

Dear Readers,

One of my greatest tools for getting me out of my own way has been letter writing. There is something about getting my true voice out there when I’m writing letters. I’ve used letter writing to stop disruptive behaviors and thoughts to getting exactly what I want. I’m often asked about how I found my way out of the dark times. I finally decided it was time to have a blog dedicated to letters from a better me (click here to take you to the link).

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The major inspiration for this blog came from a piece I wrote called An Open Letter to Those I Have Judged… .  Over the past few years I’ve come across multiple letters and seeing how they have affected my life. Letters helped me take my personal power back.

I hope you will enjoy the blog. If you do like it, remember to follow it in order to get notifications when new letters are posted. Thank you for all your love and support. I will continue to write pieces for this site too. Each one has a very special meaning to me.

With Love and Gratitude,

Rachael Wolff ©2017